[update] like a sunrise;

[mlina]

    
    


    
    


    
    

Be who you are and say what you feel,
because those who mind don’t matter,
and those who matter don’t mind.
     -- Dr. Seuss

I should really get back to sleep because I woke up at about 4am after falling asleep well before midnight last night and that is way too early since I have shift at three this afternoon.

I did, however, want to put this down:


But. That is not the point of this post. LMAO.'>

I don't really talk about my Tumblr that much, because one) I keep it strictly for a purpose other than stalking pictures and gifs for epic flail, I promise, other than the flail and that's to use it as a base of operations for my music; and two) because, in all brutal honesty -- Tumblr stresses me the hell out.

I don't know how to be myself over there and still juggle it well enough so that the highlight of the damn thing is me and my music and who I am. It never feels natural for me to post my selcas lol Mags badassbaby what is acquiring this term in my vocab or vanity shots because I don't want to look like I'm this conceited little girl with nothing better to do with her life than take gratuitous photos of herself. I mean, I like taking pictures of myself. But I like other things too. A lot of them hence my humongous backlog of THINGS TO DO.

Another is that, sometimes, I get really annoyed with the stuff I see. Not everything, of course. There are huge gems on Tumblr like that 9-piece gif set up there which is making me miss watching Doctor Who. Seriously. But sometimes, I see these "inspirational pictures" that are words stamped prettily over a 500x300 pixel-sized photo -- and they're not inspirational at all. They're actually very self-depracating and hipster and subvertly negative.

I don't need this kind of shenaniganry in my life. GOOD!FLAIL ONLY PLZ.

But. That is not the point of this post. LMAO.

It's kind of a trend, I think. This whole hiatus from my music thing.

I took a year off from a lot of things without even noticing that I actually did: doing lives, posting recorded music.

I've already talked about why that is, or why it feels that way for me, but what I always fail to address and just manage to skirt around is that -- there's a lot of fear inside of me.

I'm not very brave, I don't think so at least. At least not when venturing anywhere new. I can be as open or as pushy (I love that word, Em emothy) or adorably obnoxious to my friends -- but that's with my friends. With people I trust. Which, considering by the way I'm allowing myself to expand my social circle again, is a huge improvement over the last couple of years.

So when I go on Tumblr and share a cover of a song that I actually finished about two weeks ago. A cover I need Hiei and Em and Cyn vacivity to kick me (figuratively, we don't live in the same place enough for this to be real) in the bum so that I stop wibbling and just post--



--and then I get this amazing, beautiful, overwhelming response of love from not just friends but total strangers.

Well. Noey Waterworks are close enough to a meme now, really.



And I just really wanted to share that.

So yeah, happy Monday. :) Working only four days this week before I take Friday off to chill. It's the fourteenth today so that means YAY! MONIES! tomorrow. :)

P.S. For those of you in LJRPLand: Have a troll. Yeah, yeah. My life is eaten by Tokusatsu and I FREAKING. LOVE EEEET. /worships at the amazing altar of this brilliant, ridiculous, foppish privateer