stand, stand, stand so still that i can't take what's been spelled all over my face.
he called me again at 9:48.
seriously what do i have to do to prove that i don't like him and what else can he do to ruin every plain thought i used to produce inside my mind.
I am fed up and tired and through. A person works and works and works to be passed over for someone that doesn't work. I worked and worked 50-60 hour work weeks to go to school, all summer. This has been my whole life and so much more since highschool and i have been cheated. I have been cheated out of opportunities that i was entitled to. That i have worked for. I have worked so hard to be where i am right now, but when I add it all up it doesn't mean anything. I'm tired and drained and i can't believe the events that have taken place.
Chris is M.E. There is something seriously wrong with this statement. This would never happen in a real higher learning institution. The person with the experience and the knowledge and not to mention competence would be selected. Not the HIGHSCHOOL DROPOUT. This is insanity and i've been cheated and i can't help but think this surronds my gender and the fact that chris is about 3 miles up the instructors ass.
I've been pushed aside and i have never been filled with such resentment and spite. I have never honestly been able to say i hate someone, but i hate chris parker. I hate him and everything about him. I hate the simple fact that he exists in human society. I mean, what the fuck. He fucking knew that i wanted to do lights. Who does not know that the focus of my major surronds lighting. Everyone knows including him. However, he conveniently "forgot" that that is my major. LIAR and if i named all the times i have seen him lie i would be naming for the next three days. I hate him and i hate everything about him. He does nothing. nothing. he doesn't even fucking work and he gets by. I work and work and drain myself out to go to school and be a theatre major and sometimes i feel like i'm aging by the second. I work so hard and he slides by. He takes over everything i've been working, without doing anything. Does he have finance his car insurance, or even finance his school tuition. Does he have to sit there and try and figure out how he's going to pay for his education. NO. He's a thief and a liar and he's so fucking lazy. he does nothing and continues to do nothing and eventhough he doesn't even have a highschool education he still gets by. He still flys right by me and i can't stand it.
And now he's been casted in the show and i think i hate him even more. He's such a fake and i would love more then anything to expose him for who he really is. I won't work with him. I just won't. I don't even want to be within ten feet of him, let alone sit next to him in the light booth. I would rather live in a dumpster filled with rotting eggs then work with him in this show.
And what pisses me off more is he thinks nothing or anything he does. He shows no remorse for anything. Everything is fine and great and i can't be mad at him or anything. I'm mad and i'm done. This is my last semester as a theatre major. I'm done. Something died in me the day Chris was named M.E. I lost something and i don't think i'll ever get it back. I've lost hope in myself and this direction of life. It's over and i'm not going back. I'm going to major in English secondary education with a minor in general theatre.
I've lost all my ambition and dreams in theatre, but mostly i've lost all the faith and determination i had within myself.
stand, stand, stand so still that i can't take what's been spelled all over my face
she's not good enough and never will be
not for me
not for me
no lie, just a need
and hey, by the way let's spend the rest of our days under this warmth
where i only feel cold
No purpose
and i don't feel anything but the distance
vast distance between me and everything that came to be true in my tiny heart.
NO purpose
but such distance and i take, take, take this far into a pale discrepancy that can only seem true as long as i'm afraid of what's right inside.
seriously what do i have to do to prove that i don't like him and what else can he do to ruin every plain thought i used to produce inside my mind.
I am fed up and tired and through. A person works and works and works to be passed over for someone that doesn't work. I worked and worked 50-60 hour work weeks to go to school, all summer. This has been my whole life and so much more since highschool and i have been cheated. I have been cheated out of opportunities that i was entitled to. That i have worked for. I have worked so hard to be where i am right now, but when I add it all up it doesn't mean anything. I'm tired and drained and i can't believe the events that have taken place.
Chris is M.E. There is something seriously wrong with this statement. This would never happen in a real higher learning institution. The person with the experience and the knowledge and not to mention competence would be selected. Not the HIGHSCHOOL DROPOUT. This is insanity and i've been cheated and i can't help but think this surronds my gender and the fact that chris is about 3 miles up the instructors ass.
I've been pushed aside and i have never been filled with such resentment and spite. I have never honestly been able to say i hate someone, but i hate chris parker. I hate him and everything about him. I hate the simple fact that he exists in human society. I mean, what the fuck. He fucking knew that i wanted to do lights. Who does not know that the focus of my major surronds lighting. Everyone knows including him. However, he conveniently "forgot" that that is my major. LIAR and if i named all the times i have seen him lie i would be naming for the next three days. I hate him and i hate everything about him. He does nothing. nothing. he doesn't even fucking work and he gets by. I work and work and drain myself out to go to school and be a theatre major and sometimes i feel like i'm aging by the second. I work so hard and he slides by. He takes over everything i've been working, without doing anything. Does he have finance his car insurance, or even finance his school tuition. Does he have to sit there and try and figure out how he's going to pay for his education. NO. He's a thief and a liar and he's so fucking lazy. he does nothing and continues to do nothing and eventhough he doesn't even have a highschool education he still gets by. He still flys right by me and i can't stand it.
And now he's been casted in the show and i think i hate him even more. He's such a fake and i would love more then anything to expose him for who he really is. I won't work with him. I just won't. I don't even want to be within ten feet of him, let alone sit next to him in the light booth. I would rather live in a dumpster filled with rotting eggs then work with him in this show.
And what pisses me off more is he thinks nothing or anything he does. He shows no remorse for anything. Everything is fine and great and i can't be mad at him or anything. I'm mad and i'm done. This is my last semester as a theatre major. I'm done. Something died in me the day Chris was named M.E. I lost something and i don't think i'll ever get it back. I've lost hope in myself and this direction of life. It's over and i'm not going back. I'm going to major in English secondary education with a minor in general theatre.
I've lost all my ambition and dreams in theatre, but mostly i've lost all the faith and determination i had within myself.
stand, stand, stand so still that i can't take what's been spelled all over my face
she's not good enough and never will be
not for me
not for me
no lie, just a need
and hey, by the way let's spend the rest of our days under this warmth
where i only feel cold
No purpose
and i don't feel anything but the distance
vast distance between me and everything that came to be true in my tiny heart.
NO purpose
but such distance and i take, take, take this far into a pale discrepancy that can only seem true as long as i'm afraid of what's right inside.