Questions and Prayers
There's something important that I need to talk about. I'm going to talk about it here, because you all are my friends and I'm just really confused, frustrated and hurt right now.
For the past couple of weeks, I have been going to a Mormon church. I was invited by missionaries to attend a few church gatherings, and I saw no harm in doing so. About once a week, they would come over and talk to me and my mom. Then they started asking me if I wanted to get baptized. I kept saying no, I wasn't ready. They continue to ask, and I continue to refuse.
Today the missionaries came over again. My mom was not home at the time, and there is a rule that they aren't allowed inside the house unless there is an adult male present. My brother wasn't home, so I told them that we could go outside and talk.
They brought up the subject of baptism again. I said I wasn't ready, and that I didn't want to rush into anything. I said that even if I did want to be baptized, I didn't think I could because there are people that I really care about who wouldn't be able to make it. They kept insisting that I could take pictures. Then one of them said, "I really wish I could tell you that you could wait, Jasmine, but Satan is working overtime on you."
I felt for sure I hadn't heard him right. What was it, a sales pitch? "Satan is working OVERTIME on you"? How in the world would he know what Satan was doing? It hurt me at first, and then I started just getting angry. I listened patiently to what he said, not really knowing how to respond to that. How can someone even THINK about saying that to another person? Was I not going to church? Was I not doing what I thought was the right thing to do? Man, it hurt...
So, yeah, I guess I just wanted to say that I've decided not to talk to them for a good long while. You can't put a time limit on a person's faith. You can't say, "You'll go to hell if you're not baptized this Saturday." (That's pretty much what they were telling me). I realize now that it was a stupid idea to go to the church in the first place without checking things out. It was stupid and wrong and I am just really mad that I could have been that naive. I should have looked into it. I should have listened to my intuition. I was so stupid...
I'm sorry. I realize that the last two entries have been nothing but ranting and raving and self-pity, but I promise that I will shape up very soon. Thanks for listening. I appreciate it. Until next time,
JAZZY
For the past couple of weeks, I have been going to a Mormon church. I was invited by missionaries to attend a few church gatherings, and I saw no harm in doing so. About once a week, they would come over and talk to me and my mom. Then they started asking me if I wanted to get baptized. I kept saying no, I wasn't ready. They continue to ask, and I continue to refuse.
Today the missionaries came over again. My mom was not home at the time, and there is a rule that they aren't allowed inside the house unless there is an adult male present. My brother wasn't home, so I told them that we could go outside and talk.
They brought up the subject of baptism again. I said I wasn't ready, and that I didn't want to rush into anything. I said that even if I did want to be baptized, I didn't think I could because there are people that I really care about who wouldn't be able to make it. They kept insisting that I could take pictures. Then one of them said, "I really wish I could tell you that you could wait, Jasmine, but Satan is working overtime on you."
I felt for sure I hadn't heard him right. What was it, a sales pitch? "Satan is working OVERTIME on you"? How in the world would he know what Satan was doing? It hurt me at first, and then I started just getting angry. I listened patiently to what he said, not really knowing how to respond to that. How can someone even THINK about saying that to another person? Was I not going to church? Was I not doing what I thought was the right thing to do? Man, it hurt...
So, yeah, I guess I just wanted to say that I've decided not to talk to them for a good long while. You can't put a time limit on a person's faith. You can't say, "You'll go to hell if you're not baptized this Saturday." (That's pretty much what they were telling me). I realize now that it was a stupid idea to go to the church in the first place without checking things out. It was stupid and wrong and I am just really mad that I could have been that naive. I should have looked into it. I should have listened to my intuition. I was so stupid...
I'm sorry. I realize that the last two entries have been nothing but ranting and raving and self-pity, but I promise that I will shape up very soon. Thanks for listening. I appreciate it. Until next time,
JAZZY