Welcome Back
So, after a loooong hiatus, I think I'm going to start journaling again. The reason I stopped was because Amy found it and she and I were not in a place at that point where I could have a journal that she didn't know about, and I couldn't have her reading what I was saying, either.
But, now things are different between us (yay) so the journal is back. I'm really only interested in writing about professional stuff and maybe gossip about people and stuff like that. My relationship with Amy will no longer be a central focus at all.
The reason I wanted to start writing again is mainly because I'm bored. Since Lent started, I've been trying to be more focused on my contribution to society. Amy and I have committed to going to church every Sunday between now and Easter, and I'm just trying to recommit myself to being a better person.
In large part that commitment starts with my performance at work. This is because at times I feel like I'm just taking money from my employer. I hesitate to use the word "robbing" because I don't want to be brought up on criminal charges from a stupid journal. But let's just say that lately my motivation hasn't really been there. So another Sunday evening came and I again attempted to change all that. I was to show up at work today and get it all together. Really try, because I am a good person, I have a solid work ethic, and I care about doing a good job.
But no. I show up this morning ready to try, ready to make a difference, but I kind of lost track of what exactly it is I'm supposed to be doing today. That's been the problem all along. I don't have a clear sense of what my goals are (which is kind of my fault, honestly), and that makes it really hard to actually work when it comes time to do so. I have been given broad over-arching goals, but I haven't been able to drill those down to actual day-to-day responsibilities. That's why I like trouble shooting so much better. It's like you just have an issue to work on, you resolve it, and you're done. There's a clear deadline, all that. All this stuff about trying to plan, work towards a goal way off in the future, it doesn't jive with my personality well, let me tell you. Anyway. Back to the salt mines.
But, now things are different between us (yay) so the journal is back. I'm really only interested in writing about professional stuff and maybe gossip about people and stuff like that. My relationship with Amy will no longer be a central focus at all.
The reason I wanted to start writing again is mainly because I'm bored. Since Lent started, I've been trying to be more focused on my contribution to society. Amy and I have committed to going to church every Sunday between now and Easter, and I'm just trying to recommit myself to being a better person.
In large part that commitment starts with my performance at work. This is because at times I feel like I'm just taking money from my employer. I hesitate to use the word "robbing" because I don't want to be brought up on criminal charges from a stupid journal. But let's just say that lately my motivation hasn't really been there. So another Sunday evening came and I again attempted to change all that. I was to show up at work today and get it all together. Really try, because I am a good person, I have a solid work ethic, and I care about doing a good job.
But no. I show up this morning ready to try, ready to make a difference, but I kind of lost track of what exactly it is I'm supposed to be doing today. That's been the problem all along. I don't have a clear sense of what my goals are (which is kind of my fault, honestly), and that makes it really hard to actually work when it comes time to do so. I have been given broad over-arching goals, but I haven't been able to drill those down to actual day-to-day responsibilities. That's why I like trouble shooting so much better. It's like you just have an issue to work on, you resolve it, and you're done. There's a clear deadline, all that. All this stuff about trying to plan, work towards a goal way off in the future, it doesn't jive with my personality well, let me tell you. Anyway. Back to the salt mines.