Grey's Anatomy Post 5x10 One-Shot: Part Two
Hey Everyone!
So here is part two to my post 5x10 one-shot. I didn't know if I wanted to make it into two parts, but I did. So I hope you enjoy!
Here's the link to Part One:
http://mizzougirl88.livejournal.com/8398.html
Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy.
I’m the one who makes you laugh when you know you’re about to cry
I know your favorite songs and you tell me about your dreams
I think I know where you belong, I think I know it’s with me
I was finally home.
After the day from hell, I was so glad to see the house on Queen Anne Hill.
I left the hospital feeling like a failure. I couldn’t save her. I just couldn’t save her.
She was only sixteen. Sixteen.
That age is just too young for me. Even though I have been a doctor, an attending for almost fifteen years the death still gets to me. I have never gotten over the fact that I cannot save every person that comes into my OR.
But I just don’t want to see or experience anymore death. I have had my fair share during my forty years of existence.
Death. The word has haunted me ever since I was seven years old. The age where not only did my world fall apart, but also my family’s. The day that I never really talk about. I still remember that day like it was yesterday….
I had woken to the sound of my mother’s voice coming from the foot of my bed. She was begging me to wake up so that I would be able to have breakfast before the bus arrived at my house. Even though I was annoyed that I had to get up, I still listened to my mother.
I got dressed and went downstairs to have breakfast, but on the way down I heard the front door open. Mark Sloan’s booming voice followed the loud bang of the front door closing. “Derek! Derek! Where are you?” I heard him calling from our front foyer.
“I’m right here, Mark.” I said as I reached the bottom of the staircase.
“Are you excited for our super cool science experiment today? I bet that Emily will want to work with me today, since I’m the smartest in the class.”
I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, I bet she will.”
Even back then, Mark Sloan thought that he was God’s greatest gift to women.
“You know that she likes me. You were the one that told me you overheard her telling Julie the other day that she thought that I was cute.”
“I thought that she was joking.”
“You’re just jealous,” he said with a big grin.
I just ignored him and walked into the kitchen, since my stomach made a loud growl. I made my way over to the kitchen table, and sat next to my father, while Mark sat on the other side of me. My mom greeted me with a bowl of cereal, the same kind that my father ate everyday. “Thank you, Mom,” I said.
“Your welcome, sweetheart.” She replied.
I glanced over at my father, who was reading the local newspaper; a tradition, a habit that he did everyday.
“Hey Dad, what are you doing today?”
My father glanced up from the page that he was currently looking at. “I’m going to head over to the hospital, and hopefully save a few lives.”
“That sounds awesome! I hope to become a doctor like you someday.” I said with a big grin.
My father reached over and ruffled my dark hair. “I’m sure you’ll get there someday, son.”
As soon as he turned back to his paper, the phone rang. My mother stopped what she was doing, and answered it after the second ring.
“Shepherd residence.”
I looked over at my mom as she was listening to the person on the other line. She glanced up at my father and said, “Of course. He’s right here.”
She had a curious look on her face as she spoke to my father. “It’s the hospital. They said that it’s urgent.”
My father got up from his chair and went over to the phone, taking it from my mother.
“Dr. Shepherd, speaking.”
I turned back to my cereal after looking at Mark. He had a weird look on his face, because rarely did my father get a call from the hospital. When they did call him, it was usually just to see if he could fill in for a doctor that couldn’t make it into work that day.
Mark whispered to me, “What do you think happened?”
“I don’t know. It must be bad if they are calling Dad.”
I looked at my father again, watching his facial expressions. His face never changed, but I could tell that something was wrong by the way he was talking to the other person on the line. “Ok. I’m leaving now. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”
Once he hung up the phone, my mother asked, “Michael, what’s wrong?”
He turned and looked at her and replied, “There was a major pile-up on the road close to town. They said that there were multiple injuries, and a lot of head traumas. Carmichael is swamped, and he needs another neurosurgeon to take some of the load off of his hands.”
“So are you leaving now?”
“Yeah. I should be back by dinner time. It not, then I will give you a call.”
“Ok,” my mom went over and kissed my dad’s cheek.
I looked over at Mark again, and he was staring at my father. He always looked to my father as his own father, and my mother as his own mother. In all the years that he had been over at my house, he had never seen my dad as stressed as he was now.
That’s why Mark said in a very soft whisper, “Mr. Shepherd, I hope that you get to save those people.”
My dad turned to Mark and I and said, “I’m hoping to. You boys be good today, and take care of Mom and your sisters.”
After he said that, he headed out the door.
That was the last time that I had talked to my father.
I didn’t realize what had happened to him, until my grandmother came and picked up Mark, my sisters and I from school.
After the accident, my family grew closer together. Mark and I took over the duties as the men of the house, and made sure that my two younger sisters were looked after. We were the ones who interviewed potential boyfriends. We were the ones who walked my sisters down the isles when they were married. We became adults before we needed to be.
I snapped out of the memory when I heard the front door open. I realized that I had been crying, and quickly wiped away the tears so that the person who had come in wouldn’t see them. I cleared my already tight throat, and looked around the room.
I heard footsteps reaching the staircase, and quickly wiped the few tears that had fallen a little too late. I sat up in the bed that I shared with Meredith, and grabbed for a magazine. I didn’t want to look suspicious if Izzie or Alex had come home; because I figured since I wasn’t downstairs they would come and tell me that they were home.
I heard the person climb the stairs and realized that it wasn’t Alex, since the steps were light in sound. The second stair from the top creaked and I knew that the person was almost to my door.
I glanced down at my magazine, and flipped a few pages to look at. I heard the person outside of my door, and then heard them open it.
I glanced up not expecting her, but there she was.
Meredith gently closed the door behind her. I could tell by her defeated look that she had had a hellish day too.
“Hey,” she said as she made her way over to our bed.
“Hey,” I replied. My voice sounded a little choked up, which earned me a glance from my girlfriend.
“Are you ok?” She asked while she quickly shed her clothes and put on her pajamas.
“Yeah…Yeah, I’m fine.”
“Derek.”
“What?”
“You don’t seem fine.”
“Mer, believe me. I’m fine.”
“Ok.” By the worried tone in her voice I could tell that she didn’t believe me. She quietly slipped beside me in bed, and laid her head on my shoulder.
“What are you reading?” she whispered.
“It’s an article about a new procedure that they are trying to perfect in treating brain aneurisms.”
“Sounds interesting.”
I laughed, “It is.”
“Derek?”
“Yeah?”
“Are you sure you are ok?”
“Oh,” I sighed. “Yeah, Mer.”
“You know you can talk about it.”
This is what I love my new and improved girlfriend. She isn’t afraid to tell me that she is ready to talk, and I know for a fact that she will listen when I want to tell her.
“I know, Mer.” I said as I placed a kiss to her forehead.
Meredith closed her eyes as she snuggled closer to me. She wrapped her arms around me, and hugged me close.
“You know I’m here for you whenever you want to talk about it.”
“I know.”
“Good.”
“So, how did it go with Cristina?”
I felt Meredith tense next to me. “Uh, we are still not speaking to each other.”
“Did you talk to her earlier?”
“Yeah, but the problem is that she didn’t want to talk to me.”
“How come?”
“I don’t know.”
“Well, if you need me to rant to at the hospital, I’m all ears.”
She giggled. “Thanks, Der.”
“No problem,” I said as I leaned down and kissed her softly.
“Mmmm…” she mumbled against my lips. “So, did you have a good day?”
“Other than the surgery, I guess it was a pretty good day.”
“That’s good.”
“How was your little party at Joe’s?”
She snorted.”Funny you should ask that.”
“Mer, what happened?” I asked, concerned.
“Cristina showed up right after I got there. She sat at the opposite side of the bar and ignored me the whole night. Alex and Izzie knew something was wrong, so they asked us. Cristina told them that nothing was wrong with us. She kept sending daggers at me with her eyes, Derek.”
“I’m sure she wasn’t, Mer.”
“But she was! She kept on staring at me, and the look that she gave me made me feel like I was suffocating. So that’s why I’m here earlier than the others, because I couldn’t stand being there anymore.”
“I’m sorry, Mer. I’m sure it will all be ok.”
“But what if it isn’t? What if we can’t be friends anymore?”
“You will always have Izzie, Alex, George, Mark and Lexie. Oh, and of course you will always have me.”
I looked at her, and she was smiling at me.
“Thanks, Der.”
“Just always remember that I am always going to be there for you, no matter what.”
She giggled. “You are so cheesy sometimes.”
“You love it.”
“I do.”
We sat in a comfortable silence, Mer laying her head back on my chest. I wrapped an arm around her, and buried my face in her hair; the scent relaxing me. After a moment, she spoke again.
“Are you ever going to tell me what’s wrong?”
I sighed. I knew that Meredith wasn’t going to go to sleep or leave the room until I told her what was bothering me.
“You know, earlier, when I said that I was sick of all the death?”
“Yeah?”
I started to feel the tears building up behind my eyes. I didn’t want to cry again, but now Meredith was looking at me with a curious expression on her face.
“What I am about to tell you, I never really share with anyone. Addison didn’t even know what I am going to tell you.”
“Derek, you are really starting to scare me.” She looked at me with big eyes, and a look of worry and concern flashed across her green eyes.
“Mer, I promise it’s not scary. It’s…It’s just a really personal story, which has to do with my dad.”
She was quiet for a moment, and I thought that she was going to cry. Meredith knew that my dad died when I was little, but she didn’t know how or why he died. I felt her grab for my hand and she gave it a gentile squeeze.
“My dad passed away when I was seven.”
“I’m so sorry, Derek.”
I looked at her and gave her a half-hearted smile. “Thanks, Mer.”
She shifted next to me, getting even closer. She kissed my cheek, and I felt a little of the tension release from my chest at her simple, yet affectionate gesture.
“I woke up one day, and everything was normal. Mark came over for breakfast, mom got breakfast ready, and dad was reading his newspaper. Everything was normal. But then my dad got called to the hospital, and…and…”
“What Der? What happened?” She whispered.
“He…he got in a car wreck on the way to the hospital. The guy who hit him was asleep at the wheel, and crossed the line.”
Meredith wrapped her arms around me and gave me a gentile hug. I started to feel my hot, fresh tears making their way down my cheeks. Meredith looked up at me and wiped them away, but as I glanced at her I could see that she had tears in her eyes too.
“My whole world changed in an instant. I didn’t believe that he had died at first; I thought that it was just a dream. But the reality hit me, and one night I knew that he was never going to come home. He was never going to see me accomplish anything.”
“I’m really sorry, Derek.” Meredith whispered.
“Mark and I had to become the adults. The last thing that my dad said to me was that Mark and I were to take care of my mom and my sisters. It was almost like he knew that he wasn’t going to make it home that night. Mark and I made sure that we listened to my dad. We became the men of the house at the age of seven. We were the ones who made sure all of the boyfriends passed the test, and we were the ones to walk my sisters down the isle. We made sure that our family was taken care of.”
“So you and Mark took care of your mom and your sisters?”
“Yeah, we wanted to make dad proud.”
“That’s amazing, Derek.”
I laughed; well what I thought was a laugh. “I guess it is a little amazing.”
We both became silent again. Meredith kept her arms wrapped around me, and I hugged her close.
“Mer?”
“Hmm?”
“Dad….Dad would have liked you.”
“What?”
“When my dad was alive he wanted the best for his kids. He wanted us to be successful in life, but he also wanted us to be happy. And you make me happy. You make me so happy, Mer. More than you ever know.”
She looked at me, and I could see that she understood.
“I make you happy.”
“You make me insanely happy. I didn’t know I could be this happy, Mer. You…you are amazing.” I swear I saw a small blush creep up my girlfriend’s cheeks.
“Thank…thank you, Derek,” she said through a smile.
“I think that my dad would tell me that you are the one. You…you are amazing in so many ways, Meredith. I can’t begin to tell you how lucky I am to have met you. You, you complete me.”
“You complete me too, Derek.”
I smiled at her. The urgent need to kiss her came over my senses. I kissed her softly on the lips.
“I love you, Mer,” I said against her lips.
“I love you too, Derek.”
We curled up under the covers, Meredith’s back against my chest. I thought that Mer was asleep at first, but then I heard her ask, “Is your dad passing away what you meant by ‘I’m sick of all the death’?”
“It is part of the reason why.”
“What are the other reasons?”
I had to chuckle. “You are particularly chatty tonight.”
“I’m not chatty. You’re the chatty one.”
“I am not chatty.”
“Yes…Yes you are Derek Shepherd.”
“Am not”
“Are too.”
“Mer…”
“Yeah?”
“The other part is losing all of the patients. It’s hard…it’s so hard to lose a patient; especially one on your own table.”
“I know.”
“And there is one more part, but we don’t have to talk about it now.”
Meredith rolled over and looked me in the eye. “Why don’t you want to talk about it?”
“It’s…It’s going to be hard for us to both to talk about it,” I whispered.
“Oh.” I could tell by her response that she knew exactly what it was. The moment…the moment where I almost lost the love of my life forever.
“But, we don’t have to talk about it tonight.”
“Ok.”
“Sleep?”
“Sleep sounds good.” She said as she turned over and placed her back against my chest again.
“I love you, Mer,” I whispered in her hair.
“I love you too, Der.”
“Sleep,” I said as I kissed her neck.
I’m the one who makes you laugh when you know you’re about to cry
I know your favorite songs and you tell me about your dreams
I think I know where you belong, I think I know it’s with me
A/N: I wanted to extend the scene from Joe's, and see what happened after Mer went home. I hope you all enjoyed this!
Comments are appreciated!