Napolean Dynomite
Oh wow, this movie sucked soooo bad but these qoutes cracked me up!
Kid on Bus: What are you gonna do today, Napoleon?
Napoleon Dynamite: Whatever I feel like I wanna do, gosh! Napoleon Dynamite: Grandma just called... she said you can leave now.
Uncle Rico: I didn't hear anything from her.
Napoleon Dynamite: She said you should leave because you're ruining everyone's life and eating all our steak.
Uncle Rico: I'm not going anywhere. It's a free country.
Napoleon Dynamite: Get off my property!
Uncle Rico: Why don't you go call the cops?
Napoleon Dynamite: Maybe I will, GOSH!
Napoleon Dynamite: Stay home and eat all the freakin' chips, Kip.
Kip: Napoleon, don't be jealous that I've been chatting online with babes all day. Besides, we both know that I'm training to be a cage fighter.
Napoleon Dynamite: Since when, Kip? You have the worst reflexes of all time.
Kip: Try and hit me, Napoleon.
Napoleon Dynamite: What?
Kip: I said come down here and see what happens if you try and hit me.
Don: Hey, Napoleon. What did you do last summer again?
Napoleon Dynamite: I told you! I spent it with my uncle in Alaska hunting wolverines!
Don: Did you shoot any?
Napoleon Dynamite: Yeah, like, fifty of them! They were surrounding my cousin! What the heck would you do in a situation like that?
Don: What kind of gun did you use?
Napoleon Dynamite: A friggin' twelve gauge, what do you think?
Napoleon Dynamite: You know, there's like a butt-load of gangs at this school. This one gang kept wanting me to join because I'm pretty good with a bowstaff.
Napoleon Dynamite: I see you're drinking 1% milk. Is that because you think you're fat? Because you're not. You could probably be drinking whole milk.
Napoleon Dynamite: Do the chickens have large talons?
Farmer: Do they have what?
Napoleon Dynamite: Large talons.
Farmer: I don't understand a word you just said.
Pedro: Do you think people will vote for me?
Napoleon Dynamite: Heck yes! I'd vote for you.
Pedro: Like what are my skills?
Napoleon Dynamite: Well, you have a sweet bike. And you're really good at hooking up with chicks. Plus you're like the only guy at school who has a mustache.
Trisha: Thanks for the beautiful drawing. It's hanging in my room right now.
Napoleon Dynamite: Really? It took me like three hours to finish the shading on your upper lip. It's probably the best drawing I've ever done.
Grandma: How was school?
Napoleon Dynamite: The worst day of my life, what do you think?
Napoleon Dynamite: What kind of bike do you have?
Pedro: It's a sledgehammer.
Napoleon Dynamite: Dang!... You ever take it off any sweet jumps?
Napoleon Dynamite: [Cut to Pedro jumping] You got like three feet of air that time.
Deb: What are you drawing?
Napoleon Dynamite: A liger.
Deb: What's a liger?
Napoleon Dynamite: It's pretty much my favorite animal. It's like a lion and a tiger mixed... bred for its skills in magic.
Napoleon Dynamite: Tina, come eat some ham! TINA! EAT SOME HAM!
Napoleon Dynamite: I caught you a delicious bass.
Deb: I'm trying to raise money to go to college.
Kip: [from the background] Your mom goes to college.
Nathan: Napoleon, give me some of your tots.
Napoleon Dynamite: No, go find your own.
Nathan: Come on, give me some of your tots.
Napoleon Dynamite: No, I'm freakin' starving! I didn't get to eat anything today.
Nathan: [kicks the tots]
Napoleon Dynamite: Ugh! Gross! Freakin' idiot!
Napoleon Dynamite: Hey can I use your guys's phone for a sec?
Secretary No. 1: Is there anything wrong?
Napoleon Dynamite: I don't feel very good.
[takes telephone and dials number]
Kip: [making nachos on the other line] Hi.
Napoleon Dynamite: Is grandma there?
Kip: No, she's getting her hair done.
Napoleon Dynamite: Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...
Kip: What do you need?
Napoleon Dynamite: Can you just go get her for me?
Kip: I'm really busy right now.
Napoleon Dynamite: Just tell her to come get me.
Kip: Why?
Napoleon Dynamite: Cause I don't feel good!
Kip: Well, have you talked to the school nurse?
Napoleon Dynamite: No, she doesn't know anything. Will you just come get me?
Kip: No.
Napoleon Dynamite: Well, will you do me a favor then? Can you bring me my chapstick?
Kip: No, Napoleon.
Napoleon Dynamite: But my lips hurt real bad!
Kip: Just borrow some from the school nurse. I know she has like five sticks in her drawer.
Napoleon Dynamite: I'm not gonna use hers, you sicko!
Kip: See ya.
Napoleon Dynamite: Ugh! Idiot!
Pedro: Who was that?
Napoleon Dynamite: Trisha.
Pedro: Who's she?
Napoleon Dynamite: My woman I'm taking to the dance.
Pedro: Did you draw her a picture?
Napoleon Dynamite: Heck yes I did.