I'm So Sorry, But I Love You... It's a LIE
~Back to Part 1~
I'm so sorry but I love you.. It was all lies
I didn't know… Now I realized that I need you..
I'm so sorry but I love you...Out of anger
I pushed you away with those piercing words, without realizing..
I'm so sorry but I love you... It was all lies
I'm so sorry ( I'm sorry ) but I love you ( I love you more… more)
I'm so sorry but I love you...
Can you leave me and forget me slowly, so I can get hurt?
Yamapi was driving into the jimoshu parking area as he saw a familiar figure walking towards the main road. He totally sure that the guy is Ryo aside of his well disguised attires. He stopped his car immediately as he fears he will lose the sight of his best friend. Ryo was missing without a trace since he resigned. He keep himself isolated somewhere without giving a hint about his hideout place. Yamapi almost run to get Ryo when suddenly the slim body swayed a little before collapsed on the road.
“RYO-CHANNNN!!!!” He screamed panicky as he running as fast his can towards the laying body.
He took off Ryo cap and sunglasses and trying to wake him up but failed. With the help of a few people around the area, they brought Ryo to Yamapi’s car. Soon, Yamapi drove his care as fast as he can to the nearby hospital. While Ryo been brought into emergency room, Yamapi with shaky hands calling for Jin after filling the needed forms. Soon as Jin answered his phone, Yamapi burst into tears.
“Pi?? Nande??”
“Jii… Jinn.. Ry… Ryo-chan.. hospital…,” he was sobbing hard as he manage to tell Jin the name of the hospital.
Jin came to the hospital with the whole KAT-TUN and NEWS in tow. Although, Kazuya and Koki oppose the idea of Tatsuya seeing Ryo again, they say nothing as looking into Tatsuya pleading eyes. Jin also has informed NEWS and Ryo’s family as he sure Yamapi will not in his right mind to do that. They found Yamapi crouching with Ryo’s jacket in his tight hug praying hard for Ryo. As he saw Jin, he run into his best friend hug mumbling incoherent words of Ryo’s condition, abandoning Ryo’s jacket that fallen on the floor. Koyama picked up the jacket and an envelope fell from the pocket, all crumpled and has Tatsuya’s name on it. Koyama handed the envelope to Tatsuya making the beautiful singer frown in puzzled. He reads the written name on it, with well-known of the owner of the hand writing:
上田竜也
With trembling fingers, he open the envelope and fished out a paper or a letter to be exact.
My One and Only Love, Tatsuya…
I am sorry, for leaving our love. I am sorry for the scar that I left in your heart. Please be happy and those tears, please don’t cry for me for I don’t deserve them. For your sake, I’ll never look back again ever if you will always remains in my heart until the day I die… Letting you go took the biggest part of me but there is no regret in loving you.
This will be our last goodbye. Sayonara, Tatsuya.
I LOVE YOU,Tatsuya
Once and always.
Lost of your love,
Ryo Nishikido
I hope this is all a dream...
Because I only add up to this much...
Drop that babe. ..
I still can’t forget you…
No I don’t think I ever will, even ’til the day I die...
Did the scars I gave you heal?
I’m sorry because I never got to do anything for you.
I'm so sorry but I love you.. It was all lies
I didn't know… Now I realized that I need you..
I'm so sorry but I love you...Out of anger
I pushed you away with those piercing words, without realizing..
I'm so sorry but I love you... It was all lies
I'm so sorry ( I'm sorry ) but I love you ( I love you more… more)
I'm so sorry but I love you...
Can you leave me and forget me slowly, so I can get hurt?
Bye...bye...
Tatsuya sobs echoing in the waiting area as he finishes reading the short letter. He clutched both Ryo’s jacket and letter tightly. He never believes in a second that Ryo truly mean to break up with him. He keeps on hoping that they will be together and will be happy as before. As his friends trying to calm him down, a doctor approaches them making all attention falls on him.
“Sensei, how Ryo?” few of voices asking.
“May I know who are Nishikido-san relatives?” the doctor’s voice saying something is not right.
“They are on the way. But we are his close friends, like a blood-brothers,” Yamapi said.
“Yes, Sensei. Please tell us what’s wrong with Ryo. Please, Sensei,” Jin begging the hesitant doctor.
“Well, Nishikido-san condition is worse than before. Although he already went for the operation and we succeed in removing his tumor, but it seems like it reoccurred again faster than before. The radiation and chemotherapy supposed to slow its growth, but as he didn’t comes for the treatment lately, the tumor cells spreading aggresively,” the doctor stop for a breath, “ So,..” looking at faces full of surprised and confused, he tried to think the easy way to make them understand the situation.
“Sensei, wait a minute. What do you mean by tumor? What tumor?” Shige decided to end the confusion.
“Nishikido-san was diagnosed with Glioblastoma Multiforme (GBM IV) six months ago. It is one types of brain tumor which is the most aggressive one. He already went for surgical operation to remove the tumor but he stopped attending his treatment 8 weeks ago and the tumor growth back rapidly worsen his condition…,” the doctor explained to them.
‘Tumor? 8 weeks?’ Tatsuya feels like dying himself. That is the week when they have a fight and Ryo left their home. He feels weak all of sudden and fall onto his knees sobbing harder than before making all of his friends attention falls on him.
“Tat-chan,” Kazuya kneel beside him, hugging his shivered body, trying to share some strength.
“Kk..Kazuu.. He.. left because…,” Tatsuya could not continues his words as he finally understand the reason of Ryo’s weird behavior and the reason for leaving Tatsuya, the man he loves with all of his heart.
Both NEWS and KAT-TUN felt in silent cries as the doctor left them to attend his patient. Soon, Ryo’s families and Kanjani8 arrives and been explained about Ryo’s condition. Not only his friends, even his families were shocked as they never know Ryo’s suffering such disease. No wonder Ryo such a mystery months before. The doctors decided to undergoes another operation with the consent of Ryo’s parents even if the percentages for him to survive are only 10%. As long as there is a single hope of Ryo recovering from this cruel disease, they are willing to take the risk.
The operation took almost 16 hours before finally the doctors went out from the operation theater. All of them rushed to the doctor’s side to know Ryo’s condition.
“Sensei, how is my son?” Ryo’s father asked.
The doctor has a regret look in his eyes, saying softly, “I’m sorry, Nishikido-san. There’s complication as the operation went. We tried everything to save him, but…” with that,Ryo’s mother wailed before fall unconscious. All of Ryo’s friends cry in anguish over the lost of their best friend.
Tatsuya lost his voice to say anything. Soon as they were allowed to see Ryo’s body, Tatsuya being the first one to enter the room followed by others. He walked with shaky legs towards the laying death body of his lover.
“Ryo..,” He held Ryo’s cold hand with both of his hands and blurry eyes because of the tears keep streaming down his paled cheeks. He touched his lover’s paled cheeks and strokes them lightly as if he afraid to hurt him. The loss of heat from his lover’s body making him feels hard to breath. He could not control himself anymore as he laid his head on Ryo’s chest that is now silent without the heartbeat he used to listen to, hugging the lifeless body tighter than ever.
“Ryo,wake up… You sleep for a long time already…Let’s go home… ne?” he said to the stiff body, tears still running down his cheeks. “Don’t leave me, please… please…,” he begging his dead lover, making people around him lost in their emotion too.
Girl.. I’m sorry…
But I love you…
It’s all I got to say…
But everything gonna be alright, isn’t it?
So… Damn!! Why am I crying?
Without anyone realized it, tears slipped from Ryo’s closed eyes. ‘I love you, Tatsuya. Once and always… Sayonara…’
‘I love you, Ryo. Always have, always will…’
~OWARI~
I'm so sorry but I love you.. It was all lies
I didn't know… Now I realized that I need you..
I'm so sorry but I love you...Out of anger
I pushed you away with those piercing words, without realizing..
I'm so sorry but I love you... It was all lies
I'm so sorry ( I'm sorry ) but I love you ( I love you more… more)
I'm so sorry but I love you...
Can you leave me and forget me slowly, so I can get hurt?
Yamapi was driving into the jimoshu parking area as he saw a familiar figure walking towards the main road. He totally sure that the guy is Ryo aside of his well disguised attires. He stopped his car immediately as he fears he will lose the sight of his best friend. Ryo was missing without a trace since he resigned. He keep himself isolated somewhere without giving a hint about his hideout place. Yamapi almost run to get Ryo when suddenly the slim body swayed a little before collapsed on the road.
“RYO-CHANNNN!!!!” He screamed panicky as he running as fast his can towards the laying body.
He took off Ryo cap and sunglasses and trying to wake him up but failed. With the help of a few people around the area, they brought Ryo to Yamapi’s car. Soon, Yamapi drove his care as fast as he can to the nearby hospital. While Ryo been brought into emergency room, Yamapi with shaky hands calling for Jin after filling the needed forms. Soon as Jin answered his phone, Yamapi burst into tears.
“Pi?? Nande??”
“Jii… Jinn.. Ry… Ryo-chan.. hospital…,” he was sobbing hard as he manage to tell Jin the name of the hospital.
Jin came to the hospital with the whole KAT-TUN and NEWS in tow. Although, Kazuya and Koki oppose the idea of Tatsuya seeing Ryo again, they say nothing as looking into Tatsuya pleading eyes. Jin also has informed NEWS and Ryo’s family as he sure Yamapi will not in his right mind to do that. They found Yamapi crouching with Ryo’s jacket in his tight hug praying hard for Ryo. As he saw Jin, he run into his best friend hug mumbling incoherent words of Ryo’s condition, abandoning Ryo’s jacket that fallen on the floor. Koyama picked up the jacket and an envelope fell from the pocket, all crumpled and has Tatsuya’s name on it. Koyama handed the envelope to Tatsuya making the beautiful singer frown in puzzled. He reads the written name on it, with well-known of the owner of the hand writing:
上田竜也
With trembling fingers, he open the envelope and fished out a paper or a letter to be exact.
My One and Only Love, Tatsuya…
I am sorry, for leaving our love. I am sorry for the scar that I left in your heart. Please be happy and those tears, please don’t cry for me for I don’t deserve them. For your sake, I’ll never look back again ever if you will always remains in my heart until the day I die… Letting you go took the biggest part of me but there is no regret in loving you.
This will be our last goodbye. Sayonara, Tatsuya.
I LOVE YOU,Tatsuya
Once and always.
Lost of your love,
Ryo Nishikido
I hope this is all a dream...
Because I only add up to this much...
Drop that babe. ..
I still can’t forget you…
No I don’t think I ever will, even ’til the day I die...
Did the scars I gave you heal?
I’m sorry because I never got to do anything for you.
I'm so sorry but I love you.. It was all lies
I didn't know… Now I realized that I need you..
I'm so sorry but I love you...Out of anger
I pushed you away with those piercing words, without realizing..
I'm so sorry but I love you... It was all lies
I'm so sorry ( I'm sorry ) but I love you ( I love you more… more)
I'm so sorry but I love you...
Can you leave me and forget me slowly, so I can get hurt?
Bye...bye...
Tatsuya sobs echoing in the waiting area as he finishes reading the short letter. He clutched both Ryo’s jacket and letter tightly. He never believes in a second that Ryo truly mean to break up with him. He keeps on hoping that they will be together and will be happy as before. As his friends trying to calm him down, a doctor approaches them making all attention falls on him.
“Sensei, how Ryo?” few of voices asking.
“May I know who are Nishikido-san relatives?” the doctor’s voice saying something is not right.
“They are on the way. But we are his close friends, like a blood-brothers,” Yamapi said.
“Yes, Sensei. Please tell us what’s wrong with Ryo. Please, Sensei,” Jin begging the hesitant doctor.
“Well, Nishikido-san condition is worse than before. Although he already went for the operation and we succeed in removing his tumor, but it seems like it reoccurred again faster than before. The radiation and chemotherapy supposed to slow its growth, but as he didn’t comes for the treatment lately, the tumor cells spreading aggresively,” the doctor stop for a breath, “ So,..” looking at faces full of surprised and confused, he tried to think the easy way to make them understand the situation.
“Sensei, wait a minute. What do you mean by tumor? What tumor?” Shige decided to end the confusion.
“Nishikido-san was diagnosed with Glioblastoma Multiforme (GBM IV) six months ago. It is one types of brain tumor which is the most aggressive one. He already went for surgical operation to remove the tumor but he stopped attending his treatment 8 weeks ago and the tumor growth back rapidly worsen his condition…,” the doctor explained to them.
‘Tumor? 8 weeks?’ Tatsuya feels like dying himself. That is the week when they have a fight and Ryo left their home. He feels weak all of sudden and fall onto his knees sobbing harder than before making all of his friends attention falls on him.
“Tat-chan,” Kazuya kneel beside him, hugging his shivered body, trying to share some strength.
“Kk..Kazuu.. He.. left because…,” Tatsuya could not continues his words as he finally understand the reason of Ryo’s weird behavior and the reason for leaving Tatsuya, the man he loves with all of his heart.
Both NEWS and KAT-TUN felt in silent cries as the doctor left them to attend his patient. Soon, Ryo’s families and Kanjani8 arrives and been explained about Ryo’s condition. Not only his friends, even his families were shocked as they never know Ryo’s suffering such disease. No wonder Ryo such a mystery months before. The doctors decided to undergoes another operation with the consent of Ryo’s parents even if the percentages for him to survive are only 10%. As long as there is a single hope of Ryo recovering from this cruel disease, they are willing to take the risk.
The operation took almost 16 hours before finally the doctors went out from the operation theater. All of them rushed to the doctor’s side to know Ryo’s condition.
“Sensei, how is my son?” Ryo’s father asked.
The doctor has a regret look in his eyes, saying softly, “I’m sorry, Nishikido-san. There’s complication as the operation went. We tried everything to save him, but…” with that,Ryo’s mother wailed before fall unconscious. All of Ryo’s friends cry in anguish over the lost of their best friend.
Tatsuya lost his voice to say anything. Soon as they were allowed to see Ryo’s body, Tatsuya being the first one to enter the room followed by others. He walked with shaky legs towards the laying death body of his lover.
“Ryo..,” He held Ryo’s cold hand with both of his hands and blurry eyes because of the tears keep streaming down his paled cheeks. He touched his lover’s paled cheeks and strokes them lightly as if he afraid to hurt him. The loss of heat from his lover’s body making him feels hard to breath. He could not control himself anymore as he laid his head on Ryo’s chest that is now silent without the heartbeat he used to listen to, hugging the lifeless body tighter than ever.
“Ryo,wake up… You sleep for a long time already…Let’s go home… ne?” he said to the stiff body, tears still running down his cheeks. “Don’t leave me, please… please…,” he begging his dead lover, making people around him lost in their emotion too.
Girl.. I’m sorry…
But I love you…
It’s all I got to say…
But everything gonna be alright, isn’t it?
So… Damn!! Why am I crying?
Without anyone realized it, tears slipped from Ryo’s closed eyes. ‘I love you, Tatsuya. Once and always… Sayonara…’
‘I love you, Ryo. Always have, always will…’
~OWARI~