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[mizukino]

-sighs- There's always so much I want to say. But I hold back in fear that I'll either annoy and push people away, or that I'll end up having people hate me.. And with so few left, I can't risk that anymore. I push people away nearly daily

Comments

[rosekissdragon]

because you have to look past all the lies and pain because you cannot deny that at the time, you were happyish, at the time they did mean somehting.
my entire realtiomship with gary was a lie, and i spent over a yeah hating him and thinking everything was a worhtless lie. gary raped me and beat me and told me every day how worhtless I was. but now I'm sitting here and remembering the good times, even if thewy all were a lie. but I canot deny I loved him. I was engaged to him. he made me happy he was my life and my world, even if it ws all a lie.
its no good tp spend your life hating someone and not remebering good times because you start to feel as if those years were a waste fo your life, when you were happy, when there were good times. fuck if they were a lie, sometimes the differfence ofhaving a good life is looking past the lies.
if i spent my whole life remembering people for only thier lies, I could never look back on me nad pual and be grateful for the wonderfulness he brought in my life. but hes gay, menaing he may have never relaly loved me, but i look past that and remmeber we both were very happy, even if it was a lie to him for love, it ws still the best time of my life. if i only remmebered the lies withjon, i woudnt have abest friend. life is a series of getting over the bed things in life and finding soemthing good to remember it by. something to leanr from, if nothing else. but it dos no good to dwell ont he bad bcause its ends up in petty arguments and for some people, thier hatred becomes a sixck obsession....and i dont want ot see thathapppen to you, if it already hasnt.
but I'll shit up now since it seems you are mad at me anywyas for voicing my opnion