I hate feeling so stupid
I'm taking the CSET (California Standardized Educators Test) for science on Saturday- my 4th attempt at taking it. The test is to prove I'm competnet to teach Jr. high and high school science. There are 3 parts to it- I passed part I already, but I have to take parts II and a concentration (I chose Biology, although I've also tried Chemistry) exam. I just don't understand how I'm not passing the tests- I have a freaking college degree in science! Why can't I pass a high school level test? It makes me feel so incompetent and stupid. I'm a good teacher- I KNOW I am, have data and recommendations to prove it. I know my stuff inside and out, forwards and backwards. I just can't pass this ridiculous exam. The thing that terrifies me is that I need to look for a new job this spring, and there is not a district out in the world that will take me without a full single-subject credential. PUHSD (where I'm employed now) took me because I was coming in from out of state, so they gave me time to get everything set. What's my excuse- 2 years later, and I still can't pass the exam? Great- let's hire THAT one!
I'm crying again... I hate this...
I'm crying again... I hate this...