Family adventures with Star Wars
After reading the multitudes of posts about Revenge of the Sith (I’m probably one of the last 10 people on LJ who has not seen it, btw), it came to my attention that a horrible cultural tragedy has taken place. There are young people out there who have not seen the original trilogy and yet have seen the prequels. And liked them, apparently. Needless to say, I was shocked.
Well, something had to be done. That something was to expose our children to Star Wars. It’s been a semi-regular habit in our house to watch DVDs on Sunday evenings. It tends to be a G-rated affair. We catch up on the latest Disney or Pixar release and eat pizza while sitting on the floor in front of the TV. We thought they might be old enough to like Star Wars *snerk* er, or maybe not.
This is what happened. Son is 3 and daughter is 4 1/2.
Me: Opens TV cabinet, pushes aside Harry Potter DVD to get to the Star Wars one.
Daughter: Not Harry Potter, I don’t like Harry Potter. Mommy!! *whines*
Me: *resists urge to kick daughter, hard, because that would be wrong. And it’s not like we watch Harry Potter all the time.
Movie starts. Booming music. Children are impressed.
Triangular imperial starship flies by.
Son: Whoa.
Daughter already looks bored.
Me: There’s a princess in the movie.
D: *perks up*
C-3PO and R2-D2 appear.
Me: Look robots!
Son: eeeee! *toddler fists*
Princess Leia appears, finally.
Me: Look the princess!
Daughter eeee! *toddler fists*
Skipping forward: C-3PO and R2-D2 land on Tatooine. Blah-ditty-blah, blah. Children are bored.
D: Where’s the princess?
Me: She’s on the spaceship.
D: oh.
Those mini scavengers with the glowing eyes appear.
S: Ooh! *points* He likes the scavenger guys.
They kidnap R2-D2 and put him on their roving scavenger vehicle. It’s full of robots.
S: Ooh, Ooh, Squee!
More robots. They squeak and whirl.
S: Squee! Squee!11!eleventy-one!!
D: Where’s the princess?
Me and husband in unison: She’s on the spaceship.
D: oh
Me: Look there’s the princess!
D: Yay!
Me: ...but the bad guy’s going to torture her with that needle device. Er...
D: *looks alarmed*
Moving on: Sandpeople, Obi-Wan appears, blah, blah, blah.
D: Where’s the princess?
Son joins in the chorus: She’s on the spaceship.
D: Oh.
Two minutes pass.
D: Where’s the princess?
Me: *facepalm*
Son wanders away. Daughter starts a monologue comparing Princess Fiona and Princess Leia's dresses. She starts talking about Sleeping Beauty’s dress, too.
Nobody is watching the movie.
D: Can we watch Cinderella instead?
Son bounds into room
S: Cinderella!!1eleventy-one!!
Me: *sighs*
Well, something had to be done. That something was to expose our children to Star Wars. It’s been a semi-regular habit in our house to watch DVDs on Sunday evenings. It tends to be a G-rated affair. We catch up on the latest Disney or Pixar release and eat pizza while sitting on the floor in front of the TV. We thought they might be old enough to like Star Wars *snerk* er, or maybe not.
This is what happened. Son is 3 and daughter is 4 1/2.
Me: Opens TV cabinet, pushes aside Harry Potter DVD to get to the Star Wars one.
Daughter: Not Harry Potter, I don’t like Harry Potter. Mommy!! *whines*
Me: *resists urge to kick daughter, hard, because that would be wrong. And it’s not like we watch Harry Potter all the time.
Movie starts. Booming music. Children are impressed.
Triangular imperial starship flies by.
Son: Whoa.
Daughter already looks bored.
Me: There’s a princess in the movie.
D: *perks up*
C-3PO and R2-D2 appear.
Me: Look robots!
Son: eeeee! *toddler fists*
Princess Leia appears, finally.
Me: Look the princess!
Daughter eeee! *toddler fists*
Skipping forward: C-3PO and R2-D2 land on Tatooine. Blah-ditty-blah, blah. Children are bored.
D: Where’s the princess?
Me: She’s on the spaceship.
D: oh.
Those mini scavengers with the glowing eyes appear.
S: Ooh! *points* He likes the scavenger guys.
They kidnap R2-D2 and put him on their roving scavenger vehicle. It’s full of robots.
S: Ooh, Ooh, Squee!
More robots. They squeak and whirl.
S: Squee! Squee!11!eleventy-one!!
D: Where’s the princess?
Me and husband in unison: She’s on the spaceship.
D: oh
Me: Look there’s the princess!
D: Yay!
Me: ...but the bad guy’s going to torture her with that needle device. Er...
D: *looks alarmed*
Moving on: Sandpeople, Obi-Wan appears, blah, blah, blah.
D: Where’s the princess?
Son joins in the chorus: She’s on the spaceship.
D: Oh.
Two minutes pass.
D: Where’s the princess?
Me: *facepalm*
Son wanders away. Daughter starts a monologue comparing Princess Fiona and Princess Leia's dresses. She starts talking about Sleeping Beauty’s dress, too.
Nobody is watching the movie.
D: Can we watch Cinderella instead?
Son bounds into room
S: Cinderella!!1eleventy-one!!
Me: *sighs*