x__x
Currently my life seems to be against me. No contopia...no birthday party, because it's senseless to ask all my friends, whether they've time..I know they do not have...or they do not want to pay the money to visit me at my home. I understand this. really. how could anyone want this to do?
well....I feel like somebody who's not important to anyone! I can't help it. the week started very well....I've got this great feeling about vacation. only one day and I can sit back and just relax. I really need a break. but today...everything has changed. my mood seems to be the worst at that time. there are thousand different thoughts in my mind...>__< drives me crazy. there's one person..I really like, but he's feeling very bad at the moment and he doesn't want to talk about it. this is so horrible. I want to help him, but I don't know how. I always feel bad, if others feel bad, doesn't matter, whether I know the person or not. x.x
There's only one person who really knows my feelings,too..and who also understands 'em. sad, isn't it?! x__x argh..I can't tell my thoughts in a logical way. sorry. you needn't to understand me....I myself can't understand!
I know I'm not very intelligent. I'm afraid of my future. my abitur. Can I pass? Will I become happy? Will I do something of what I'm going to think: yes..that was right?
I'm brainless and silly, childish and naive. Nobody could ever like or even love me, because I myself don't do this. This sounds so ridiculous and poor.....but that's exactly what I am. will I always be alone? Damn me!
Why do I have to be that stupid?
Why do I always cause pain and sorrow?
Why am I so selfish? .......maybe you should forget about me...even though I think people surely will do this anytime!
well....I feel like somebody who's not important to anyone! I can't help it. the week started very well....I've got this great feeling about vacation. only one day and I can sit back and just relax. I really need a break. but today...everything has changed. my mood seems to be the worst at that time. there are thousand different thoughts in my mind...>__< drives me crazy. there's one person..I really like, but he's feeling very bad at the moment and he doesn't want to talk about it. this is so horrible. I want to help him, but I don't know how. I always feel bad, if others feel bad, doesn't matter, whether I know the person or not. x.x
There's only one person who really knows my feelings,too..and who also understands 'em. sad, isn't it?! x__x argh..I can't tell my thoughts in a logical way. sorry. you needn't to understand me....I myself can't understand!
I know I'm not very intelligent. I'm afraid of my future. my abitur. Can I pass? Will I become happy? Will I do something of what I'm going to think: yes..that was right?
I'm brainless and silly, childish and naive. Nobody could ever like or even love me, because I myself don't do this. This sounds so ridiculous and poor.....but that's exactly what I am. will I always be alone? Damn me!
Why do I have to be that stupid?
Why do I always cause pain and sorrow?
Why am I so selfish? .......maybe you should forget about me...even though I think people surely will do this anytime!