Frank | "Little Miss Sunshine" | Milliways Bar

[mmdaisies]

In comes a bearded man wearing a white button-down shirt, white pants, and white bandages wrapped around his wrists. His expression and slightly disheveled hair suggests he has gone through hell, and believes he is presently stepping into another level of it

Comments

[bythatmuch]

Okay, so, Brick's sideburns and horribly huge glasses? Not that bad. He pulled the sideburns off well!

But.

This guy? That beard?

"Listen," Max says, hopping onto the stool next to his new doppelganger, "you need to shave, man. You're making us look bad."

... not the best intro ever, but at least he's being honest?

[iheartproust]

"Excuse m--" He turns. He stares.

He has really gone off the reservation.

"I have really gone of the reservation."

[bythatmuch]

"Well, you did decide to grow that... thing on your face. So I am inclined to agree."

MAX IS A JERK.

[iheartproust]

" -- I've imagined myself clean-shaven, well dressed, and self-critical. That makes perfect sense!" There are even wide-open hand gestures to demonstrate HOW PERFECTLY THIS ALL MAKES SENSE!

[bythatmuch]

Ooooookay.

Crazy dude really is crazy?

OH WAIT MAYBE -

"This is your first time here, isn't it?"

[iheartproust]

"Well, I believe this is the first time I've visited the crazier part of my brain."

[bythatmuch]

"... aw, shit, man. I didn't know."

OOPS.

"Sorry about that. Uh. Congratulations, you're not crazy! This place really exists. It's a bar at the end of the Universe."

And that is a really weird looking beard, now that he's gotten a good look at it.

(It's very possible that he's invading Frank's personal space. ... because he is.)

[iheartproust]

Frank...really didn't ever want to be this close to his own face. Ever.

At least he has nice breath.

"Of course it is!" he says, leaning back. "That doesn't sound crazy at all!"

[bythatmuch]

"I know it sounds crazy, but it's true."

He taps on the bar. "Ask for a drink and see what happens."

[iheartproust]

"And from whom am I to order this drink?"

[bythatmuch]

"The bar."

Beat.

"Here, I'll show you. Bar? I'd like some cranberry juice, please."

A glass of cranberry juice appears. (With a crazy straw and an orange slice, of course.)

[iheartproust]

Frank merely stands there, staring.

"And this is somehow going to convince me that I'm not crazy."

[bythatmuch]

"At least you're not retarded."

IT COULD BE WORSE, FRANK. You could be a weatherman.

[iheartproust]

"Thank you. Those are very comforting words. Betchya you aren't retarded. No, I'd wager to guess that you're sane, you're happy, you're in love, you just got promoted and you have the admiration of all your peers."

[bythatmuch]

"Most of my peers think I'm a calamity, actually."

... Max realizes he's not helping.

"Uh. First drink's free, by the way. I'm Max," he says, offering his hand. "Maxwell Smart."

[iheartproust]

"You're kidding, right?"