[fandom_muses] (September Topic) a sorta fairytale with you
Crisis
[To the camera, a talking head shot of Pam. She looks of a mixture of annoyance, shock and amusement.]
PAM: So, wow. If Jim and I thought we could plan for everything this wedding - the office - had to offer, I think we were really really wrong. I'm not sure if it was so much the minister showing up late and drunk that maybe prompted me to suggest we ditch the big wedding and elope in Vegas or if it was the cake mix up with the red icing that said "Our Condolences. We'll Love You Forever Albert." in cursive, but I am pretty sure that what ever could have gone wrong? Did go wrong.
[Flash to a scene before the wedding, Dunder-Mifflin cameras are filming there. Jim is staring down at the rings that they will be exchanging and his forehead is crinkled up in discontent. Pam is heading out towards him, holding her wedding dress up. She's falling out of it as it is far too big for her.]
PAM: What? What is it? [She's slightly rushed and a little out of breath, a strand of hair falls into her face.] Oh, god, what else is wrong?
JIM: [Looks up to see her, really sees her, and jumps back a little in his shoulders to see her in a wedding dress. At her questioning look, he explains.] Pam. Your dress. Bad luck?
PAM: [She hitches up the front of her dress again. Sourly.] It's okay, it's not mine. What's with the rings? Please tell me, that's not the big emergency.
[Pam picks up a ring to carefully inspect it. Deciding the outside looks okay, she begins to read the personalized inscription.]
PAM: My... best... fiend? There's no 'R'.
JIM: Yeah, about that...
PAM: It says you're my best fiend, Jim. You're not my best fiend. You could be, but, I don't think I'd inscribe it on a ring.
JIM: I know things are going really badly, Pam.
PAM: Maybe our first anniversary, we'll see. Our wedding is cursed. We got a four tiered cake for a funeral.
JIM: While someone's funeral is being congratulated, I'm sure we all feel pretty bad. Except, um, Albert. Albert's not here to feel bad.
[The camera zooms in on Pam's worried face.]
PAM: [Suddenly. Decisively.] Let's elope.
JIM: Okay, well... What would we do with the guests.
PAM: They have cars.
JIM: The catered food?
PAM: Left-overs. I've done this before.
JIM: Don't remind me of that. Michael?
PAM: [Disappointed.] Oh, right.
[Back to the head shot of Pam inside of the office. She looks at the camera wearily and thoughtfully.]
PAM: And then there was that other incident... After we moved the wedding to the reception and called down a judge.
[Back to the wedding: Michael, their boss, stands up at the end of the ceremony to give a speech. After Jim and Pam kiss, he lifts his champagne glass to the couple.]
MICHAEL: I have a few things to say about marriage. [He coughs a little louder to get attention.] Everyone. I have just a few things to say about marriage.
[Off in two of the plastic and tulle covered chairs is Heather, Scott's daughter, sitting next to Roy.]
HEATHER: [to Roy] You smell like my step-grandfather.
[Roy sighs aloud.]
MICHAEL: It's been brought to my attention that the last time I did a speech like this, I got a definition wrong. Not all of us took school to be English experts, Phyllis. So, this time, I won't be talking about weddings. I am... here to talk to you about family. Our Office, the one that Pam and Jim met in, is like one big family. And this wedding is like... the kids breaking off to form their own little family. Well, guys, daddy's proud. And, recently, I found out - get this - I'm a father. And Scott, over there. [He points to Scott, who is looking nervous.] Scott there is actually my son.
SCOTT: That's, um...
MICHAEL: No, remember when I had everyone give blood to see if we could save the dogs with cancer? Your blood went to a very special puppy, but first it went to a lab. [Beat.] Pun not intended. [He holds his arms open for an embrace.] Come on, Scotty. Hug your old man.
[Scott stands up stunned and trips over a chair in a shocked attempt to escape. Jenny helps him up and out of the reception area.]
MICHAEL: [Trying to conceal how hurt he is.] That's okay. We'll hug it out later.
[Back to the office head shot of Pam.]
PAM: I am really sad that our honeymoon is over. [Thoughtfully, pressing her tongue against the roof of her mouth.] ...I wonder if we could convince Michael for more time off if I suggested that we wanted a family.
Muse: Pam Beesly
Fandom: The Office
Word Count: 1132
[To the camera, a talking head shot of Pam. She looks of a mixture of annoyance, shock and amusement.]
PAM: So, wow. If Jim and I thought we could plan for everything this wedding - the office - had to offer, I think we were really really wrong. I'm not sure if it was so much the minister showing up late and drunk that maybe prompted me to suggest we ditch the big wedding and elope in Vegas or if it was the cake mix up with the red icing that said "Our Condolences. We'll Love You Forever Albert." in cursive, but I am pretty sure that what ever could have gone wrong? Did go wrong.
[Flash to a scene before the wedding, Dunder-Mifflin cameras are filming there. Jim is staring down at the rings that they will be exchanging and his forehead is crinkled up in discontent. Pam is heading out towards him, holding her wedding dress up. She's falling out of it as it is far too big for her.]
PAM: What? What is it? [She's slightly rushed and a little out of breath, a strand of hair falls into her face.] Oh, god, what else is wrong?
JIM: [Looks up to see her, really sees her, and jumps back a little in his shoulders to see her in a wedding dress. At her questioning look, he explains.] Pam. Your dress. Bad luck?
PAM: [She hitches up the front of her dress again. Sourly.] It's okay, it's not mine. What's with the rings? Please tell me, that's not the big emergency.
[Pam picks up a ring to carefully inspect it. Deciding the outside looks okay, she begins to read the personalized inscription.]
PAM: My... best... fiend? There's no 'R'.
JIM: Yeah, about that...
PAM: It says you're my best fiend, Jim. You're not my best fiend. You could be, but, I don't think I'd inscribe it on a ring.
JIM: I know things are going really badly, Pam.
PAM: Maybe our first anniversary, we'll see. Our wedding is cursed. We got a four tiered cake for a funeral.
JIM: While someone's funeral is being congratulated, I'm sure we all feel pretty bad. Except, um, Albert. Albert's not here to feel bad.
[The camera zooms in on Pam's worried face.]
PAM: [Suddenly. Decisively.] Let's elope.
JIM: Okay, well... What would we do with the guests.
PAM: They have cars.
JIM: The catered food?
PAM: Left-overs. I've done this before.
JIM: Don't remind me of that. Michael?
PAM: [Disappointed.] Oh, right.
[Back to the head shot of Pam inside of the office. She looks at the camera wearily and thoughtfully.]
PAM: And then there was that other incident... After we moved the wedding to the reception and called down a judge.
[Back to the wedding: Michael, their boss, stands up at the end of the ceremony to give a speech. After Jim and Pam kiss, he lifts his champagne glass to the couple.]
MICHAEL: I have a few things to say about marriage. [He coughs a little louder to get attention.] Everyone. I have just a few things to say about marriage.
[Off in two of the plastic and tulle covered chairs is Heather, Scott's daughter, sitting next to Roy.]
HEATHER: [to Roy] You smell like my step-grandfather.
[Roy sighs aloud.]
MICHAEL: It's been brought to my attention that the last time I did a speech like this, I got a definition wrong. Not all of us took school to be English experts, Phyllis. So, this time, I won't be talking about weddings. I am... here to talk to you about family. Our Office, the one that Pam and Jim met in, is like one big family. And this wedding is like... the kids breaking off to form their own little family. Well, guys, daddy's proud. And, recently, I found out - get this - I'm a father. And Scott, over there. [He points to Scott, who is looking nervous.] Scott there is actually my son.
SCOTT: That's, um...
MICHAEL: No, remember when I had everyone give blood to see if we could save the dogs with cancer? Your blood went to a very special puppy, but first it went to a lab. [Beat.] Pun not intended. [He holds his arms open for an embrace.] Come on, Scotty. Hug your old man.
[Scott stands up stunned and trips over a chair in a shocked attempt to escape. Jenny helps him up and out of the reception area.]
MICHAEL: [Trying to conceal how hurt he is.] That's okay. We'll hug it out later.
[Back to the office head shot of Pam.]
PAM: I am really sad that our honeymoon is over. [Thoughtfully, pressing her tongue against the roof of her mouth.] ...I wonder if we could convince Michael for more time off if I suggested that we wanted a family.
Muse: Pam Beesly
Fandom: The Office
Word Count: 1132