*sigh* Life Sucks...
Yep... life sucks ass...
I've been having horrible depression problems lately... The only time I remember not having outburts at all was when Rachel was down... I was depressed before she came, and after she left though...
I can't stand it... I hate it... I'll be perfectly fine... and then, outta no where, I'll the sudden urge to throw myself off a cliff, or to put a knife to my wrist... though, by the way, I've done a very good job of not doing those things... except for the other night... but other than that, I've done a good job... >.>
I don't know exactly what sets off these outburts... I don't know whats causing them... maybe its because I'm crazy... Maybe not... I dunno...
I've been thinking about asking my mom if I could go back to Youth Bridge and see a counciler... or maybe even be put back on medication... I don't care so much about the medicine... But I know I need help...
Bailey told me to tell her, that the new lady down there is really good... But I'm kinda scared to tell her... I don't want to go through what happened last time... Last time, my mom just thought I was crazy and watched me like a fuggin' hawk... it was crazy... Though... I guess it was also proof she cared...
I just really don't know what to do...
I miss Rachel ... ;_;
I wish she was here... I didn't do shit like this when she was here... But, shes not here... so I'll just have to wait it out. And keep telling myself she will be here one day soon... so I don't need to kill myself...
*sigh*
Life Sucks Ass.
I've been having horrible depression problems lately... The only time I remember not having outburts at all was when Rachel was down... I was depressed before she came, and after she left though...
I can't stand it... I hate it... I'll be perfectly fine... and then, outta no where, I'll the sudden urge to throw myself off a cliff, or to put a knife to my wrist... though, by the way, I've done a very good job of not doing those things... except for the other night... but other than that, I've done a good job... >.>
I don't know exactly what sets off these outburts... I don't know whats causing them... maybe its because I'm crazy... Maybe not... I dunno...
I've been thinking about asking my mom if I could go back to Youth Bridge and see a counciler... or maybe even be put back on medication... I don't care so much about the medicine... But I know I need help...
Bailey told me to tell her, that the new lady down there is really good... But I'm kinda scared to tell her... I don't want to go through what happened last time... Last time, my mom just thought I was crazy and watched me like a fuggin' hawk... it was crazy... Though... I guess it was also proof she cared...
I just really don't know what to do...
I miss Rachel ... ;_;
I wish she was here... I didn't do shit like this when she was here... But, shes not here... so I'll just have to wait it out. And keep telling myself she will be here one day soon... so I don't need to kill myself...
*sigh*
Life Sucks Ass.