Fic: Butterfly and Natural
Well, I originally just put a notice in my last post, but hey, if I can post these on FF.net for people to see, why not LiveJournal, right? So, here's two fics, and if anyone wants to shoot concrit at me, I'll worship you forever. Seriously.
Title: Butterfly
Fandom: Glee
Characters: Little!Kurt and Little!Finn
Rating: G
Disclaimer: Not mine, though Glee has made me go poke into the dusty corners of my music collection and wonder why I wasn't still listening to something.
Summery: My mom's turning into a butterfly. Before it all became complicated, there were just two desks, two boys and a small stack of passed notes. Pre-show, concerning Kurt's mother's death.
At first, before any of this became complicated, there were two chairs and two desks. Hudson and Hummel, so close to each other in the alphabet that they couldn't help being placed together in their shared elementary school class. Finn, second to the right in the five desk row, where the small pile of paper airplanes and crumpled notes littered with eraser shavings always seemed to gather despite the teacher's best efforts. Kurt, farthest to the right, sneaking his extra supplies onto the nearby window ledge because his desk couldn't fit it all.
They were friends. Not the kind of friend that you'd take home to play with in the selective world of first grade, where cliques were already forming, but they were friends nonetheless. Friends who passed notes and played tag on the playground and joked around in class about silly little things that were never really a big deal, but seemed like it when you were only six years old.
One day, though, Kurt came in without his usual little smile. His eyes were red, and he was quiet; quieter than usual. Finn wondered what was wrong - had there been something funny in his breakfast? Finn never felt good after that.
He sat in his desk, swinging his legs every few minutes to kick at the metal bar holding the legs together, and watched Kurt out of the corner of his eye. The other boy was drawing, doodling something in his notebook, but the frown on his face remained and while Finn might have not been the smartest kid in class, he knew when someone was feeling sad.
So after a while, after the teacher had taken a break from teaching English and had moved onto math, he passed Kurt a note, childishly scribbled in fat red Crayola marker:
What's wrong?
Kurt didn't answer right away. He was still doodling on that paper, but before long he passed a scrap back over.
My mom's turning into a butterfly.
A drawing of the insect accompanied the neatly-written note (Kurt's handwriting, even then, was impeccable). Finn looked at it, blinking in confusion. A butterfly?
Kurt must have seen Finn's expression, because he started to scribble on another piece of paper. He waited until the teacher's was turned away, busy scrawling some easy mathematical equations on the chalkboard, before he passed the sheet over, and Finn unfolded it to read:
I read that when a caterpillar gets sick, it wraps itself up and turns into a butterfly.
But people aren't butterflies, thought Finn as the bell for morning recess rang, and the scuffle of feet filled the air as the rest of the class ran to grab their coats. How could they…?
Oh.
He caught up with Kurt as they walked outside, greeted with a playground covered in freshly-fallen snow and happily playing children. Touching the smaller boy on the shoulder, he pulled Kurt aside to where the snow was thinner and less people would be around to disturb them.
"Kurt…" started Finn, as he watched the other boy fasten his hat more firmly on his head, "is your mom sick?"
Kurt just nodded, fiddling with one of the white buttons on his coat now. "She's been sick before. A lot of times. But…but I think it's worse now. She won't get out of bed, Finn, and Dad just sits there. He makes me go to school, but he hasn't gone to work in a week.
"I think…I think it's really bad, this time," said Kurt, sniffling, and Finn knew that it wasn't just from the cold. As Kurt's shoulders started to shake, Finn wrapped his arms around him, hoping that he could help, even if it was only a hug.
***
Two weeks later, Kurt missed a day of school. When he came back, his eyes were red again and he was missing his smile, but there was something different about him that Finn just couldn't put his finger on.
So he got out the marker again, and passed his note:
You okay, Kurt?
Kurt didn't answer for a long time. And when he finally did, his handwriting was hardly better than Finn's.
She didn't turn into a butterfly. I guess I knew she wouldn't.
But I bet she would've made a pretty one, was Finn's reply.
Kurt read the note, smile (a new, different smile) flickering across his face, before scribbling on another sheet:
She would've made the prettiest butterfly in the world.
Title: Natural
Fandom: Kingdom Hearts
Characters: Mainly Roxas, Axel, and Xion, though there's mentions of other Organization members.
Rating: G. I'm pretty sure there's nothing offensive here (though it does work within the timeline of Days, so some events will be spoiled if you haven't finished the game/been spoiled already).
Disclaimer: Don't own this one either, no matter how much fanart I draw.
Summery: It's only natural that Axel is the reason for everything. Roxas-centric, contemplating the reasons for some of the events of 358/2 Days. As canon compliant as possible (though I think that I fudged a few details).
1.
It's only natural.
Axel was the one to bring him in, after all - not the one to find him, no, that had been Xemnas, but Roxas hadn't gone with Xemnas, had he? No, he'd gone with Axel, the teasing scheming smirking redhead with the promises of ice cream and adventure. Roxas doesn't remember a lot from his first seven days, but he remembers a flash of red hair and a lilting laugh, and really, that should have been a warning sign from the very beginning.
It all comes back to Axel, doesn't it? The one to bring him in. His first partner.
His first friend.
Xion is nice - she's funny and sweet and reminds him of a half-faded memory, but she's different. She's a girl (not that Roxas really cares about that, but the only other girl he knows is Larxene, and she's scary), and she's like him but not. She has a Keyblade but it doesn't always come. She sits by his bed and leaves him a seashell every day that he's sick, but disappears for days on end when he isn't. She says that she only wants to stay with her friends, but then she runs away again and again, leaving Axel and Roxas behind as if she doesn't know that they can't leave the Organization, they can't, not without Xemnas utterly obliterating them.
Thinking back, back to when Saïx had listed the outcome of the Oblivion project and Axel still wasn't back, still wasn't home, Roxas should have realized it. Because he'd felt something in his chest, like a burning tearing break
(but not emotion, Nobodies don't have emotion, that's for real people, right?)
rushing through him. Like fire, or splinters maybe, jabbing him again and again.
Axel couldn't be gone. Not Axel. Scary girl Larxene, scientist Vexen, quiet Zexion and Lexaeus, they could be gone. Marluxia could be gone.
But not. Axel.
Roxas told himself that, but he was listless, doing his job with a detached efficiency that would've impressed Saïx had he taken more of an interest in anything besides quotas and Kingdom Hearts (which, really, were kind of the same thing in the long run). Heartless weren't a problem for Roxas anymore, except for the bigger ones, and the adrenaline rush he got while fighting was nice. He didn't want to go back to his empty white room in their empty white castle with the empty white Nobodies slinking around.
And then Axel came back. Came back with a grin and a laugh and an armful of Roxas, because he was so
(happy)
relieved to see him alive that he just couldn't help it.
So it was only natural that when the two of them ate their ice creams atop the clock tower, Roxas smiled for the first time in days.
2.
Roxas knows what it is to like something. He likes sea-salt ice cream. He likes sitting on the clock tower with his friends, watching the sun set over the quiet town. He likes the rush of swinging his Keyblade, back to back with Axel and not being able to distinguish the lightbursts from the flame.
So it was only natural that it was Axel who explained to him what love was. The difference between like and love, and how you can love a friend but it's not the same as being in love.
Roxas wonders what being in love feels like, but he's too
(scared)
apprehensive, and doesn't ask. Because it's strange, this warmth he feels around the flame-user, and he doesn't know how to explain it.
(And it's strange, the dropping plunging sensation that fills his stomach with shivery shards of ice when he sees the Beast and the Belle girl smiling at each other.)
3.
The three of them, they're best friends, right? Inseparable. The three of them, they aren't like the other members, who keep to themselves unless there's something that they can spin to their advantage. They talk, they laugh, and they share ice cream together after a day's work of collecting hearts, and if there's more to friendship then that then Roxas doesn't need it.
So it's only natural that when Xion goes missing, for longer than usual this time, that they search the worlds to find her.
Axel finds her. Well, it's more like they both find her at about the same time, but while Roxas tries to negotiate, to convince Xion to please come back, please, we need you and miss you and it's just too quiet around the castle without you, Axel chooses another option.
He fights.
He twirls his fiery chackram and Roxas winces at the sharp clash of metal on metal, but no matter how Roxas yells and pleads for them to just stop already, to not fight, because they're friends, can't they see that? No matter what he says, there's nothing he can do, until Xion is slumped, unconscious, over Axel's shoulder, Keyblade dissipating into a shimmer of light.
And if looks could kill Roxas expects that Axel would drop dead right there, Xion gaining a conveniently bony cushion to land upon, because he's so
(angry)
irritated with Axel's behavior that he can hardly look at his friend. So he turns away as Axel disappears, and he tries to think that it's only natural that it's Axel who brings her back. Like how he'd brought Roxas into the Organization, 298 days ago.
4.
Axel…Axel is a liar. Roxas always sort of knows this - Axel never answers a question with a straight answer, and the looks he gave sometimes, like he knew more than he's letting on and wants to tell but can't, Roxas, just can't…well, it's only natural to notice that the redhead has to be hiding something.
Roxas doesn't mind, at first. At first he's new to the Organization, so obviously he's not going to be privy to a lot of their secrets right away. He gets that. Really.
But as time goes on it becomes more noticeable.
Like how Axel is dispatched to Castle Oblivion, and instead of letting Roxas know he's fine right away (because they're friends, aren't they? And friends let each other know that they're all right) he stays away. Roxas is too
(happy)
relieved to see him to question why he hasn't spoken to him before. But when Roxas decides to go to Castle Oblivion, to see for himself what happened, because he keeps seeing a boy in his dreams and there's a name niggling at his subconscious and he needs to know, needs to understand, he collapses.
Before he faints, though, and before Axel catches him, he sees the Look, burning away in eyes as green as the very heart of a fire.
Axel knows.
Axel understands.
And Axel isn't telling.
Like when it's Xion who's asleep this time, and Saïx goes around dropping words like 'broken' and 'it' and 'only a shell'. Roxas leaves seashells and sits by her bed, holds her hand and wonders and wonders but comes up blank every time.
And Axel says that he doesn't know, he doesn't know but he'll ask Saïx if it'll make Roxas feel better, because something is wrong with their friend and that's what friends do, right? They help each other.
Axel comes back, eyes downcast, and says that he found nothing. That Saïx kept his mouth shut, wouldn't tell him anything, but the Look is flickering and there's something different about the way he's holding himself, and Roxas thinks that there's more to it than that.
Axel knows.
Axel understands.
And Axel isn't telling.
Like when Xion runs off again, while Axel is with her, and he makes no move to stop her this time. He lets her run, as if he doesn't care; doesn't care enough to go after her and doesn't care enough about Roxas to do it for his sake.
And Roxas just doesn't know what to think, doesn't understand, because Axel is saying that Xion is a puppet, a mirror, just a reflection, but puppets don't smile and mirrors don't laugh and you can never touch a reflection.
And Roxas turns away, Axel's eyes burning the Look into his back, except this look is different; his eyes are saying not I want to tell you but why can't you understand?
Because Axel knows.
Because Axel understands.
And because Axel wants to tell, but Roxas isn't listening.
5.
And so it's only natural that when Roxas discovers the lies, the cover-ups and everything that Axel has done, that his best friend has done, he leaves. Walks away, and doesn't look back.
Because it all comes back to Axel, and without Axel, what reason is there to stay?
Title: Butterfly
Fandom: Glee
Characters: Little!Kurt and Little!Finn
Rating: G
Disclaimer: Not mine, though Glee has made me go poke into the dusty corners of my music collection and wonder why I wasn't still listening to something.
Summery: My mom's turning into a butterfly. Before it all became complicated, there were just two desks, two boys and a small stack of passed notes. Pre-show, concerning Kurt's mother's death.
At first, before any of this became complicated, there were two chairs and two desks. Hudson and Hummel, so close to each other in the alphabet that they couldn't help being placed together in their shared elementary school class. Finn, second to the right in the five desk row, where the small pile of paper airplanes and crumpled notes littered with eraser shavings always seemed to gather despite the teacher's best efforts. Kurt, farthest to the right, sneaking his extra supplies onto the nearby window ledge because his desk couldn't fit it all.
They were friends. Not the kind of friend that you'd take home to play with in the selective world of first grade, where cliques were already forming, but they were friends nonetheless. Friends who passed notes and played tag on the playground and joked around in class about silly little things that were never really a big deal, but seemed like it when you were only six years old.
One day, though, Kurt came in without his usual little smile. His eyes were red, and he was quiet; quieter than usual. Finn wondered what was wrong - had there been something funny in his breakfast? Finn never felt good after that.
He sat in his desk, swinging his legs every few minutes to kick at the metal bar holding the legs together, and watched Kurt out of the corner of his eye. The other boy was drawing, doodling something in his notebook, but the frown on his face remained and while Finn might have not been the smartest kid in class, he knew when someone was feeling sad.
So after a while, after the teacher had taken a break from teaching English and had moved onto math, he passed Kurt a note, childishly scribbled in fat red Crayola marker:
What's wrong?
Kurt didn't answer right away. He was still doodling on that paper, but before long he passed a scrap back over.
My mom's turning into a butterfly.
A drawing of the insect accompanied the neatly-written note (Kurt's handwriting, even then, was impeccable). Finn looked at it, blinking in confusion. A butterfly?
Kurt must have seen Finn's expression, because he started to scribble on another piece of paper. He waited until the teacher's was turned away, busy scrawling some easy mathematical equations on the chalkboard, before he passed the sheet over, and Finn unfolded it to read:
I read that when a caterpillar gets sick, it wraps itself up and turns into a butterfly.
But people aren't butterflies, thought Finn as the bell for morning recess rang, and the scuffle of feet filled the air as the rest of the class ran to grab their coats. How could they…?
Oh.
He caught up with Kurt as they walked outside, greeted with a playground covered in freshly-fallen snow and happily playing children. Touching the smaller boy on the shoulder, he pulled Kurt aside to where the snow was thinner and less people would be around to disturb them.
"Kurt…" started Finn, as he watched the other boy fasten his hat more firmly on his head, "is your mom sick?"
Kurt just nodded, fiddling with one of the white buttons on his coat now. "She's been sick before. A lot of times. But…but I think it's worse now. She won't get out of bed, Finn, and Dad just sits there. He makes me go to school, but he hasn't gone to work in a week.
"I think…I think it's really bad, this time," said Kurt, sniffling, and Finn knew that it wasn't just from the cold. As Kurt's shoulders started to shake, Finn wrapped his arms around him, hoping that he could help, even if it was only a hug.
***
Two weeks later, Kurt missed a day of school. When he came back, his eyes were red again and he was missing his smile, but there was something different about him that Finn just couldn't put his finger on.
So he got out the marker again, and passed his note:
You okay, Kurt?
Kurt didn't answer for a long time. And when he finally did, his handwriting was hardly better than Finn's.
She didn't turn into a butterfly. I guess I knew she wouldn't.
But I bet she would've made a pretty one, was Finn's reply.
Kurt read the note, smile (a new, different smile) flickering across his face, before scribbling on another sheet:
She would've made the prettiest butterfly in the world.
Title: Natural
Fandom: Kingdom Hearts
Characters: Mainly Roxas, Axel, and Xion, though there's mentions of other Organization members.
Rating: G. I'm pretty sure there's nothing offensive here (though it does work within the timeline of Days, so some events will be spoiled if you haven't finished the game/been spoiled already).
Disclaimer: Don't own this one either, no matter how much fanart I draw.
Summery: It's only natural that Axel is the reason for everything. Roxas-centric, contemplating the reasons for some of the events of 358/2 Days. As canon compliant as possible (though I think that I fudged a few details).
1.
It's only natural.
Axel was the one to bring him in, after all - not the one to find him, no, that had been Xemnas, but Roxas hadn't gone with Xemnas, had he? No, he'd gone with Axel, the teasing scheming smirking redhead with the promises of ice cream and adventure. Roxas doesn't remember a lot from his first seven days, but he remembers a flash of red hair and a lilting laugh, and really, that should have been a warning sign from the very beginning.
It all comes back to Axel, doesn't it? The one to bring him in. His first partner.
His first friend.
Xion is nice - she's funny and sweet and reminds him of a half-faded memory, but she's different. She's a girl (not that Roxas really cares about that, but the only other girl he knows is Larxene, and she's scary), and she's like him but not. She has a Keyblade but it doesn't always come. She sits by his bed and leaves him a seashell every day that he's sick, but disappears for days on end when he isn't. She says that she only wants to stay with her friends, but then she runs away again and again, leaving Axel and Roxas behind as if she doesn't know that they can't leave the Organization, they can't, not without Xemnas utterly obliterating them.
Thinking back, back to when Saïx had listed the outcome of the Oblivion project and Axel still wasn't back, still wasn't home, Roxas should have realized it. Because he'd felt something in his chest, like a burning tearing break
(but not emotion, Nobodies don't have emotion, that's for real people, right?)
rushing through him. Like fire, or splinters maybe, jabbing him again and again.
Axel couldn't be gone. Not Axel. Scary girl Larxene, scientist Vexen, quiet Zexion and Lexaeus, they could be gone. Marluxia could be gone.
But not. Axel.
Roxas told himself that, but he was listless, doing his job with a detached efficiency that would've impressed Saïx had he taken more of an interest in anything besides quotas and Kingdom Hearts (which, really, were kind of the same thing in the long run). Heartless weren't a problem for Roxas anymore, except for the bigger ones, and the adrenaline rush he got while fighting was nice. He didn't want to go back to his empty white room in their empty white castle with the empty white Nobodies slinking around.
And then Axel came back. Came back with a grin and a laugh and an armful of Roxas, because he was so
(happy)
relieved to see him alive that he just couldn't help it.
So it was only natural that when the two of them ate their ice creams atop the clock tower, Roxas smiled for the first time in days.
2.
Roxas knows what it is to like something. He likes sea-salt ice cream. He likes sitting on the clock tower with his friends, watching the sun set over the quiet town. He likes the rush of swinging his Keyblade, back to back with Axel and not being able to distinguish the lightbursts from the flame.
So it was only natural that it was Axel who explained to him what love was. The difference between like and love, and how you can love a friend but it's not the same as being in love.
Roxas wonders what being in love feels like, but he's too
(scared)
apprehensive, and doesn't ask. Because it's strange, this warmth he feels around the flame-user, and he doesn't know how to explain it.
(And it's strange, the dropping plunging sensation that fills his stomach with shivery shards of ice when he sees the Beast and the Belle girl smiling at each other.)
3.
The three of them, they're best friends, right? Inseparable. The three of them, they aren't like the other members, who keep to themselves unless there's something that they can spin to their advantage. They talk, they laugh, and they share ice cream together after a day's work of collecting hearts, and if there's more to friendship then that then Roxas doesn't need it.
So it's only natural that when Xion goes missing, for longer than usual this time, that they search the worlds to find her.
Axel finds her. Well, it's more like they both find her at about the same time, but while Roxas tries to negotiate, to convince Xion to please come back, please, we need you and miss you and it's just too quiet around the castle without you, Axel chooses another option.
He fights.
He twirls his fiery chackram and Roxas winces at the sharp clash of metal on metal, but no matter how Roxas yells and pleads for them to just stop already, to not fight, because they're friends, can't they see that? No matter what he says, there's nothing he can do, until Xion is slumped, unconscious, over Axel's shoulder, Keyblade dissipating into a shimmer of light.
And if looks could kill Roxas expects that Axel would drop dead right there, Xion gaining a conveniently bony cushion to land upon, because he's so
(angry)
irritated with Axel's behavior that he can hardly look at his friend. So he turns away as Axel disappears, and he tries to think that it's only natural that it's Axel who brings her back. Like how he'd brought Roxas into the Organization, 298 days ago.
4.
Axel…Axel is a liar. Roxas always sort of knows this - Axel never answers a question with a straight answer, and the looks he gave sometimes, like he knew more than he's letting on and wants to tell but can't, Roxas, just can't…well, it's only natural to notice that the redhead has to be hiding something.
Roxas doesn't mind, at first. At first he's new to the Organization, so obviously he's not going to be privy to a lot of their secrets right away. He gets that. Really.
But as time goes on it becomes more noticeable.
Like how Axel is dispatched to Castle Oblivion, and instead of letting Roxas know he's fine right away (because they're friends, aren't they? And friends let each other know that they're all right) he stays away. Roxas is too
(happy)
relieved to see him to question why he hasn't spoken to him before. But when Roxas decides to go to Castle Oblivion, to see for himself what happened, because he keeps seeing a boy in his dreams and there's a name niggling at his subconscious and he needs to know, needs to understand, he collapses.
Before he faints, though, and before Axel catches him, he sees the Look, burning away in eyes as green as the very heart of a fire.
Axel knows.
Axel understands.
And Axel isn't telling.
Like when it's Xion who's asleep this time, and Saïx goes around dropping words like 'broken' and 'it' and 'only a shell'. Roxas leaves seashells and sits by her bed, holds her hand and wonders and wonders but comes up blank every time.
And Axel says that he doesn't know, he doesn't know but he'll ask Saïx if it'll make Roxas feel better, because something is wrong with their friend and that's what friends do, right? They help each other.
Axel comes back, eyes downcast, and says that he found nothing. That Saïx kept his mouth shut, wouldn't tell him anything, but the Look is flickering and there's something different about the way he's holding himself, and Roxas thinks that there's more to it than that.
Axel knows.
Axel understands.
And Axel isn't telling.
Like when Xion runs off again, while Axel is with her, and he makes no move to stop her this time. He lets her run, as if he doesn't care; doesn't care enough to go after her and doesn't care enough about Roxas to do it for his sake.
And Roxas just doesn't know what to think, doesn't understand, because Axel is saying that Xion is a puppet, a mirror, just a reflection, but puppets don't smile and mirrors don't laugh and you can never touch a reflection.
And Roxas turns away, Axel's eyes burning the Look into his back, except this look is different; his eyes are saying not I want to tell you but why can't you understand?
Because Axel knows.
Because Axel understands.
And because Axel wants to tell, but Roxas isn't listening.
5.
And so it's only natural that when Roxas discovers the lies, the cover-ups and everything that Axel has done, that his best friend has done, he leaves. Walks away, and doesn't look back.
Because it all comes back to Axel, and without Axel, what reason is there to stay?