Because the whole world doesn't need to know this
I have a boyfriend.
I can already see the raised eyebrows and question fingers in the air. It was a strange, and very quick, transition from being single to being in a relationship. I'm still trying to figure it out myself. Here's the sitch.
A couple of months ago I received an e-mail from xany-hellion saying that he would be in the Boston area for a weekend and asking if I'd like to get together. It was really a rather sweet e-mail. ~blushing~
In the meantime, I'd been dating another guy, Chris, but it wasn't really going anywhere. He was critical of my desire to move to London. He didn't quite understand why I felt odd going out on dates that actually felt like dates. And we kissed a couple of times but I was so off in my own mental world I hardly noticed if I was kissing him back. I guess I was since he continued to be interested. Whatever.
So xany-hellion and I went on a date on Sunday, April 23rd before he had to fly back to Florida. We went out to brunch at the diner and then played pool at the Wave. I think we both started out a little nervous, but very quickly got comfortable. While we were playing pool (and flirting like mad... as we do), he kissed me. For the first time in months, I was completely enraptured. My mind turned to goo. I felt like my whole body could have melted into him if only there weren't clothes in the way. We talked throughout the day about all sorts of things, not the least of which was getting together again sometime. This takes some doing as he lives 1200 miles away.
At the end of the day, I drove him to the airport and we kissed goodbye and reiterated our desires to see one another again. He called me when he got home and we spoke in some form (phone, IM, etc.) every day from then on, each time discussing that I might be able to go see him over Memorial Day weekend. It was only a few days in that we both hit upon the idea of me going down there sooner. And so I went the weekend before last.
We spent four days together doing all manner of stuff. Everything from clubbing to gaming to walking to cooking to watching movies was just more fun with him. We stayed up late and geeked out and joked around and generally had a blast. It was awesome (like a hundred million hot dogs).
Over the course of the weekend, we also discussed our respective desires in location (which really don't include Florida or Massachusetts - go figure). He originally wanted to move to Seattle. I still want to move to London. Now, one would think this would be problematic... except it's not. In fact, it works out rather well to my mind (and to his, for that matter). It was clear we were thinking on the same lines when, after I got home, we had an IM conversation about the possibilities of something long-term and what that would mean in regards to goals and seeing one another and such... and we had both come to similar conclusions on potential compromises. I admitted to him, and am perfectly willing to state it here, that I was (and still am) scared as hell, but willing to give it a try.
The next day he told me about someone who was supposed to go and visit him and that he didn't want her getting any ideas about them fooling around. So he asked if he could use the g-word to refer to me. I went pale and had to remind myself to breathe. In fact, had to tell myself to take a deep breath. And said I was OK with it. I was shaking. Even now, I find myself being nervous just typing all this up.
We've spoken every day since and I'm getting more comfortable with the idea of being in a relationship with him. I don't think I could be comfortable in a relationship with someone else. That may seem a strange thing to transition to, but follow my logic on this one:
Relationships thus far have tended to impact my everyday life
I've had a feeling of being in a "honeymoon" period before
The guys I've been in relationships with have been insecure enough that they kinda' demanded that I check in with them
I've had relationships break apart specifically for the reasons he and I have already reasoned through
... and that's just a start. It's been a comfortable, gradual transition thus far, as though this relationship was always a part of my life. So I'm getting OK with it. Still nervous and scared, but getting there.
Does that clarify things?
I can already see the raised eyebrows and question fingers in the air. It was a strange, and very quick, transition from being single to being in a relationship. I'm still trying to figure it out myself. Here's the sitch.
A couple of months ago I received an e-mail from xany-hellion saying that he would be in the Boston area for a weekend and asking if I'd like to get together. It was really a rather sweet e-mail. ~blushing~
In the meantime, I'd been dating another guy, Chris, but it wasn't really going anywhere. He was critical of my desire to move to London. He didn't quite understand why I felt odd going out on dates that actually felt like dates. And we kissed a couple of times but I was so off in my own mental world I hardly noticed if I was kissing him back. I guess I was since he continued to be interested. Whatever.
So xany-hellion and I went on a date on Sunday, April 23rd before he had to fly back to Florida. We went out to brunch at the diner and then played pool at the Wave. I think we both started out a little nervous, but very quickly got comfortable. While we were playing pool (and flirting like mad... as we do), he kissed me. For the first time in months, I was completely enraptured. My mind turned to goo. I felt like my whole body could have melted into him if only there weren't clothes in the way. We talked throughout the day about all sorts of things, not the least of which was getting together again sometime. This takes some doing as he lives 1200 miles away.
At the end of the day, I drove him to the airport and we kissed goodbye and reiterated our desires to see one another again. He called me when he got home and we spoke in some form (phone, IM, etc.) every day from then on, each time discussing that I might be able to go see him over Memorial Day weekend. It was only a few days in that we both hit upon the idea of me going down there sooner. And so I went the weekend before last.
We spent four days together doing all manner of stuff. Everything from clubbing to gaming to walking to cooking to watching movies was just more fun with him. We stayed up late and geeked out and joked around and generally had a blast. It was awesome (like a hundred million hot dogs).
Over the course of the weekend, we also discussed our respective desires in location (which really don't include Florida or Massachusetts - go figure). He originally wanted to move to Seattle. I still want to move to London. Now, one would think this would be problematic... except it's not. In fact, it works out rather well to my mind (and to his, for that matter). It was clear we were thinking on the same lines when, after I got home, we had an IM conversation about the possibilities of something long-term and what that would mean in regards to goals and seeing one another and such... and we had both come to similar conclusions on potential compromises. I admitted to him, and am perfectly willing to state it here, that I was (and still am) scared as hell, but willing to give it a try.
The next day he told me about someone who was supposed to go and visit him and that he didn't want her getting any ideas about them fooling around. So he asked if he could use the g-word to refer to me. I went pale and had to remind myself to breathe. In fact, had to tell myself to take a deep breath. And said I was OK with it. I was shaking. Even now, I find myself being nervous just typing all this up.
We've spoken every day since and I'm getting more comfortable with the idea of being in a relationship with him. I don't think I could be comfortable in a relationship with someone else. That may seem a strange thing to transition to, but follow my logic on this one:
Relationships thus far have tended to impact my everyday life
I've had a feeling of being in a "honeymoon" period before
The guys I've been in relationships with have been insecure enough that they kinda' demanded that I check in with them
I've had relationships break apart specifically for the reasons he and I have already reasoned through
... and that's just a start. It's been a comfortable, gradual transition thus far, as though this relationship was always a part of my life. So I'm getting OK with it. Still nervous and scared, but getting there.
Does that clarify things?