Yup, you guessed it... I'm still alive...
Haven't been on here for a while (no shit, hey) but a lot has happened since December.
My left hand now has full feeling and movement. The grip strength in my left hand is now better than my right. I have full range of motion in my left wrist, and all but 5-10 degrees extension in in left elbow. I have been told I may never straighten my elbow fully again... I am determined to prove them wrong - after all, I was told in November that I would never really be able to do nursing again. I have been having hand therapy regularly (was weekly, then fortnightly, and now finally monthly) to improve the scarring. My surgeon apologised to me for how horrendous the scar is. I told him that I knew it would happen, it wasn't his fault, and I don't care because now I can use my arm. Hell, I was never going to be a model or win a beauty contest, anyway! The surgeon was genuinely humbled by my thanks, and when I told him that he had been the difference between my nursing career and not being able to use my hand properly again because he believed me and went ahead with the surgery, he looked a little wistful... I don't think many people actually give heartfelt thanks these days... but thanks to this man I can feel my fingers again and use my left hand once more.
I went back to work 3 days a week, 4 hours a day in February. In March I was taken up to 3 days a week, 6 hours a day. I am still on those hours. It is a very long, frustrating and slow return to work, but so far it is working. I can't increase my hours at the moment, because two days a week I am in the pool for 40 minutes doing some really heavy duty hydrotherapy that makes me really tired. It is working, though, because I now have a lot of scapular control, and I can actually raise my arm (unsupported) above 90 degrees... I just can't do it very much yet because the muscles fatigue really quickly still. I can't take a patient load, but I can do medication rounds, obs, lots of paperwork, feed patients, do very basic dressings and generally help out. I have been told I am not to take a patient load, wash patients, make beds, do any manual handling, or put on gowns to go into infectious rooms... but I manage to get a lot of stuff done in my 6 hour shifts.
So yeah, the injury is finally being managed correctly. I am seeing results. I have entirely different people in Injury Management helping me now, and so there are a lot less roadblocks to my recovery. It feels a lot less like I am fighting now.
Michaela decided in October last year that she wanted to become Catholic. We spent a lot of time with Father Paul, one of the Jesuit priests at Norwood, teaching her everything she needed to know. This weekend saw the culmination of all that work when she was received into the Catholic church (she had been Baptised Lutheran at 5 months old) and she was Confirmed and had her First Holy Communion. I was so proud of her as she stood in front of the entire congregation (and the church was packed, because it was the Easter Vigil service on Satuday night) and stated her intention to become Catholic. She looked gorgeous... not just physically, but I have not seen her smile that much for a very long time. She just radiated happiness. It really was beautiful to see... and I didn't cry! Mass started at 7pm, and finished around 9... we didn't leave until around 9:30, and I didn't get to bed until around 11...
Michaela and Father Paul
Sunday morning saw me wake nice and early to make apple crumble for our lunch with Daniel and Heidi (Kristian's brother and sister-in-law) and their kids. It meant a drive to Gawler even though I felt like I had been hit by a truck, but it was a lovely day, and we didn't get home until about 8pm!!! I have been waking before 7am every day of my annual leave, and running around doing so much that now I feel like I need a holiday from my holiday!
Now that my surgery is over and done with, I can crochet once more, and so I have been frantically crocheting things for my pregnant family and friends. The first is due in 4 weeks (my massage therapist), then Heidi (sister-in-law) is due a week after that, then my oldest and dearest friend, Melanie, is due with her second child about a month after that. You know what? I am so excited for my friends and their expanding families... but I have no desire to breed again! I will more than happily support them and crochet for them and hold their babies... but there is no way that I am ever having another... and I am really OK with that. People seem to think I am a bit cold or weird for not wanting another child... but when you think about the practicalities of it - Michaela is almost 13. It is incredibly easy for me to get pregnant... but incredibly hard for me to stay pregnant. I was laid up from 32 weeks with Michaela and have been told I would be with any successive pregnancies because of my stupid connective tissues... so I wouldn't be able to work, which means no money. Kristian and I have never been child-free in our home for longer than about 4 or 5 days at a time, and we would like to spend some time together before we are too old hahahahaha. So yeah... bring me your babies, people... I will love them and cuddle them and even change their pooey nappies for you... but I will gladly hand them back!
Have taken to watching WWE again, and for some reason was compelled to get Wrestlemania delivered to my dish. 99% of me regretted it... but 1% was thrilled I had seen it when Edge announced his retirement a week later. I got to see his final match, and I watched him go out on top. Hell, I remember when he was fueding with Gangrel and Christian... then joined them as The Brood. I was roleplaying online in the old Anne Rice stuff I did, and was just touching on White Wolf stuff through V:TM... it was exciting to think that these professional wrestlers could be geeks like me *lol* and I watched Edge and his giant chin wrestle his way through a brilliant career - always exciting to watch him.
I head back to work this afternoon for my first shift in 10 days (I love taking spontaneous annual leave) and to be honest, I am doing it for the money today. I am tired and sore, and I am frustrated with how slow my return to work has been. It is a public holiday (ANZAC Day - Lest We Forget) and I will be getting around $70 an hour. That's bloody good money... but when you are doing paperwork on a late shift it is disheartening and makes me feel like less of a nurse. I am hoping to win the $25 million dollars in Tuesday night's Oz Lotto (or at least a share in it of maybe a couple of million) so I can retire and let my poor body (and mind) heal. Hell, who doesn't want to retire early, right?
So yeah... I'm still here. I will always be here, and probably always whinging about my left arm/shoulder/elbow/neck hehheh.
My left hand now has full feeling and movement. The grip strength in my left hand is now better than my right. I have full range of motion in my left wrist, and all but 5-10 degrees extension in in left elbow. I have been told I may never straighten my elbow fully again... I am determined to prove them wrong - after all, I was told in November that I would never really be able to do nursing again. I have been having hand therapy regularly (was weekly, then fortnightly, and now finally monthly) to improve the scarring. My surgeon apologised to me for how horrendous the scar is. I told him that I knew it would happen, it wasn't his fault, and I don't care because now I can use my arm. Hell, I was never going to be a model or win a beauty contest, anyway! The surgeon was genuinely humbled by my thanks, and when I told him that he had been the difference between my nursing career and not being able to use my hand properly again because he believed me and went ahead with the surgery, he looked a little wistful... I don't think many people actually give heartfelt thanks these days... but thanks to this man I can feel my fingers again and use my left hand once more.
I went back to work 3 days a week, 4 hours a day in February. In March I was taken up to 3 days a week, 6 hours a day. I am still on those hours. It is a very long, frustrating and slow return to work, but so far it is working. I can't increase my hours at the moment, because two days a week I am in the pool for 40 minutes doing some really heavy duty hydrotherapy that makes me really tired. It is working, though, because I now have a lot of scapular control, and I can actually raise my arm (unsupported) above 90 degrees... I just can't do it very much yet because the muscles fatigue really quickly still. I can't take a patient load, but I can do medication rounds, obs, lots of paperwork, feed patients, do very basic dressings and generally help out. I have been told I am not to take a patient load, wash patients, make beds, do any manual handling, or put on gowns to go into infectious rooms... but I manage to get a lot of stuff done in my 6 hour shifts.
So yeah, the injury is finally being managed correctly. I am seeing results. I have entirely different people in Injury Management helping me now, and so there are a lot less roadblocks to my recovery. It feels a lot less like I am fighting now.
Michaela decided in October last year that she wanted to become Catholic. We spent a lot of time with Father Paul, one of the Jesuit priests at Norwood, teaching her everything she needed to know. This weekend saw the culmination of all that work when she was received into the Catholic church (she had been Baptised Lutheran at 5 months old) and she was Confirmed and had her First Holy Communion. I was so proud of her as she stood in front of the entire congregation (and the church was packed, because it was the Easter Vigil service on Satuday night) and stated her intention to become Catholic. She looked gorgeous... not just physically, but I have not seen her smile that much for a very long time. She just radiated happiness. It really was beautiful to see... and I didn't cry! Mass started at 7pm, and finished around 9... we didn't leave until around 9:30, and I didn't get to bed until around 11...
Michaela and Father Paul
Sunday morning saw me wake nice and early to make apple crumble for our lunch with Daniel and Heidi (Kristian's brother and sister-in-law) and their kids. It meant a drive to Gawler even though I felt like I had been hit by a truck, but it was a lovely day, and we didn't get home until about 8pm!!! I have been waking before 7am every day of my annual leave, and running around doing so much that now I feel like I need a holiday from my holiday!
Now that my surgery is over and done with, I can crochet once more, and so I have been frantically crocheting things for my pregnant family and friends. The first is due in 4 weeks (my massage therapist), then Heidi (sister-in-law) is due a week after that, then my oldest and dearest friend, Melanie, is due with her second child about a month after that. You know what? I am so excited for my friends and their expanding families... but I have no desire to breed again! I will more than happily support them and crochet for them and hold their babies... but there is no way that I am ever having another... and I am really OK with that. People seem to think I am a bit cold or weird for not wanting another child... but when you think about the practicalities of it - Michaela is almost 13. It is incredibly easy for me to get pregnant... but incredibly hard for me to stay pregnant. I was laid up from 32 weeks with Michaela and have been told I would be with any successive pregnancies because of my stupid connective tissues... so I wouldn't be able to work, which means no money. Kristian and I have never been child-free in our home for longer than about 4 or 5 days at a time, and we would like to spend some time together before we are too old hahahahaha. So yeah... bring me your babies, people... I will love them and cuddle them and even change their pooey nappies for you... but I will gladly hand them back!
Have taken to watching WWE again, and for some reason was compelled to get Wrestlemania delivered to my dish. 99% of me regretted it... but 1% was thrilled I had seen it when Edge announced his retirement a week later. I got to see his final match, and I watched him go out on top. Hell, I remember when he was fueding with Gangrel and Christian... then joined them as The Brood. I was roleplaying online in the old Anne Rice stuff I did, and was just touching on White Wolf stuff through V:TM... it was exciting to think that these professional wrestlers could be geeks like me *lol* and I watched Edge and his giant chin wrestle his way through a brilliant career - always exciting to watch him.
I head back to work this afternoon for my first shift in 10 days (I love taking spontaneous annual leave) and to be honest, I am doing it for the money today. I am tired and sore, and I am frustrated with how slow my return to work has been. It is a public holiday (ANZAC Day - Lest We Forget) and I will be getting around $70 an hour. That's bloody good money... but when you are doing paperwork on a late shift it is disheartening and makes me feel like less of a nurse. I am hoping to win the $25 million dollars in Tuesday night's Oz Lotto (or at least a share in it of maybe a couple of million) so I can retire and let my poor body (and mind) heal. Hell, who doesn't want to retire early, right?
So yeah... I'm still here. I will always be here, and probably always whinging about my left arm/shoulder/elbow/neck hehheh.