Blah
Today I've been feeling exceedingly depressed.
Christmas is coming up, and this is normally my favorite time of year. This year though, I just can't get into it. I haven't put up my tree yet. I haven't decorated the house yet. I have only bought 3 presents so far. And things just pretty much suck this year. I don't really have any desire to put up my tree or decorate. I don't want to do anything. I want to buy presents, because we need to, but not because I want to.
John took a demotion at work, which is a good and a bad thing. He's not on call all the damned time and not uber stressed out all the time now. He actually has time that we can spend together, which is good. The bad part of it is that he took a significant decrease in pay, and we are now pretty much living on my pay. It's good that he's less stressed, but I am so much more stressed because of trying to pay bills, and various other things that we need to do. And there's no money for Christmas gifts.
John's ex wife has reared her ugly head, and is now making life miserable. We have to try and figure out how to handle things nicely, and if that doesn't work, then get a lawyer involved. We might have a plan on how to deal with her, but we have to check out the divorce decree and see what that says first.
The last 3 or so days have been complete painful hell. So bad that I just want to cry. The Lyrica is helping, but it's getting colder, and cold sucks. Yesterday in class my hands hurt so badly that I could barely take notes.
I guess all in all I am just depressed. There's a lot more going on, but I don't want to get into it yet. at least in depth. My dad might have cancer, I'm not supposed to know, but my mom wanted me to know.
The good thing right now is that last weekend I got to see my niece and brother and sister-in-law. I was very excited about that. She's getting so big! And she's such a little trouble maker. Just like her aunt.
Christmas is coming up, and this is normally my favorite time of year. This year though, I just can't get into it. I haven't put up my tree yet. I haven't decorated the house yet. I have only bought 3 presents so far. And things just pretty much suck this year. I don't really have any desire to put up my tree or decorate. I don't want to do anything. I want to buy presents, because we need to, but not because I want to.
John took a demotion at work, which is a good and a bad thing. He's not on call all the damned time and not uber stressed out all the time now. He actually has time that we can spend together, which is good. The bad part of it is that he took a significant decrease in pay, and we are now pretty much living on my pay. It's good that he's less stressed, but I am so much more stressed because of trying to pay bills, and various other things that we need to do. And there's no money for Christmas gifts.
John's ex wife has reared her ugly head, and is now making life miserable. We have to try and figure out how to handle things nicely, and if that doesn't work, then get a lawyer involved. We might have a plan on how to deal with her, but we have to check out the divorce decree and see what that says first.
The last 3 or so days have been complete painful hell. So bad that I just want to cry. The Lyrica is helping, but it's getting colder, and cold sucks. Yesterday in class my hands hurt so badly that I could barely take notes.
I guess all in all I am just depressed. There's a lot more going on, but I don't want to get into it yet. at least in depth. My dad might have cancer, I'm not supposed to know, but my mom wanted me to know.
The good thing right now is that last weekend I got to see my niece and brother and sister-in-law. I was very excited about that. She's getting so big! And she's such a little trouble maker. Just like her aunt.