Comments | mistigger33: Another E-mail.. This one not so nice

mistigger33

Another E-mail.. This one not so nice

Jun 26, 2007 15:18

John's ex-wife pisses me off! She sent me that nice little e-mail, talking about how much she appreciates me, and now this... Keep reading...

( cut for e-mail and cursing )

Comments 8

42redmonkeys June 27 2007, 01:06:54 UTC

answer her questions and do not elaborate.
Yes they have a land line - the number is this.
they will be home alone _________ time and __ time and they will have rules about where they are allowed to go and who they go with OF COURSE.
There will be a list of phone numbers posted on the fridge for them and ___ will check on them at ___ intervals.

also - there is a pill cup out there to help kids learn to take pills, it's got like a little trayish thing on it where you set the pill and then you drink from that side of the cup, it spills the pill and the liquid into the mouth at the same time and you rarely realize you're swallowing the pill at all.

You might also want to practice with ticktacks....though....methphen is usually such a small pill...............I hope that wes's dr knows that hes pouring his pills on food. alot of them say specificly not to do that.

mistigger33 June 27 2007, 12:18:55 UTC

I just don't think she needs to know. It's not like she is sending the kids off to irresponsible distant relatives. They are coming to see their FATHER! She is essentially questioning how he parents them when they are here. And it pisses both of us off.

Where might I find one of these cups? I've never seen one, but I think it might be just the key. He's not taking methphen. He's on Adderall. They gave him a special tablet that he can pour it into applesauce... I don't know the pharmacy tech in me is screaming that that is a BAD idea!!!

42redmonkeys June 27 2007, 12:57:17 UTC

by methphen I meant Methylphenidate, figured you'd be familiar with that generic name for Ritalin, Attenta, Concerta , Metadate, Methylin ,Rubifen. and Focalin.

obviously he's not ON that type of drug with the adderall.

It's never a good idea to open a capsule.

has she given you any instructions on how she feeds him around his medication dosing schedule? This is an issue as the medicine is a severe appetite suppressant.

about the info on who what where when...If I was you, I wouldnt take it so personally. I would want to know who was taking care of my child. I could understand if you were 1/2 and 1/2 custody and it were a typical day in the neighborhood...but it's not. If her living arangement changed and she informed YOU she had a new job and the kids would be alone, would YOU not worry and ask for details about their care?

Honestly from this side of the fence, I dont feel that her asking for that information is wrong in any way....and you KNOW I side with YOU almost indefinately on all of the "other parent" issues.

::hug::

mistigger33 June 27 2007, 14:05:29 UTC

Oh I know about all the drug issues... She actually doesn't know what the hell she is doing... I imagine I will be doing a whole lot of regulating while Wes is here..

I can understand her concern. I really can. I just can't get over the fact that this is not the first time that she has tried to control our time with the kids. She's always about wanting to know exactlty what the kids are doing with us, pretty much, she wants us to give her a typed up, double spaced, minute by minute agenda of what we will be having them do and we can't deviate from it.

The thing is, and I know you know this, with John's type of job, they could be home by themselves from 1 hour to 6... You never know what's going to happen. He's home more now than he was when he was working the other job. And the biggest problem that we both have, is that the kids aren't going to some wayward place. They are coming to see us... Their other set of parents.

She just doesn't trust us as parents is all it boils down to

descoundres June 27 2007, 09:08:02 UTC

Having dealt with the mother from hell (as you may gather some from my recent entries) for several years...this isn't so bad. Granted, it may be overly concern, but it may also be the beginning of slight passive aggressive tendencies, especially with the complimenting then switching to saying things like you're going to allow them to hang out with strangers and she's glad that your dad is nearby. Anita, Greg's mom was classic for that...at first, and still sometimes does it. The best you can do is answer the email calmly, providing her plainly with the information, the landline, answer in simple answers, avoid the telling her the schedule. And document everything! You have no idea if things turn sour how important documentation and with date/time stamping can be. So if you haven't, start a file, print out the emails you sent out giving the information, like the phone number, highlight her email address,the date, etc...and save all this in a file, if you have bad or stressful phone conversations, invest in a small recorder so that the ( ... )

mistigger33 June 27 2007, 12:26:08 UTC

Neither John and I want to e-mail her with all the answers. The kids are being taken care of by their Father and their Step mother. It's not like she is shipping them off to a distant relative that no one knows, and can't trust. John has a say in how they are raised. And the whole landline thing really gets me... She knows we have a landline, I e-mailed her the number. SHE'S CALLED US ON IT! She's an idiot!

Maybe I just need to call you and comiserate!

As for Wes not being able to take a pill... Neither he nor Miranda can take pills, cause Kristin can't take pills. And she has coddled the kids to make them think that since she can't take larger pills, that neither can they. And now they are convinced they can't. I firmly believe that if they cannot take pills at the agers of 12 and 14 that they need to go to specialists.

descoundres June 27 2007, 18:28:24 UTC

The only reason I state to answer her back with simple replies is because she can easily come back later and state that you were being non-cooperative, that you failed to communicate with her and maybe even lie saying that you're irresponsible parents, that you let them spend time with strangers, gone and left them alone for 10 hours a day. Yes, she can say those things and she can get away with them, easily. Family courts in general favor the mother, period. If you speak with a mediator and she claims all these things with no documentated proof, then its her word against yours and her being not only the custodial parents, but the mother, will win, not you. Its not fair, but its unfortunately how things tend to work. So you two, for your sake and the kids' sake, even if you don't like it, really should bite down your anger, write out an adult, mature, simple response, you don't have to provide her with a detailed schedule, just let her know that they won't be left alone for all hours of the day, that you know the neighbors, etc...and ( ... )

mistigger33 June 27 2007, 18:51:51 UTC

I'll mention this to John. One thing is, is she isn't the custodial parent. She has primary physical custody, but they have Joint legal custody.

I'm going to leave it up to him on what he does, but tell him that if he doesn't respond and document it in some way, that it just may hurt him in the long run if we ever go into court with this.

We're now just trying to bide our time. The kids are almost 18... 4 years for Wesley and 6 for Miranda...