Drama! Oh how I loveses the internet, yes I do.
Yay, drama! At the moment I'm just sick and tired of my community in WoW... Sure, it's nice as it lets me be feral, I can lead raids (being one of the ones with the most raidexperience) and I have a say in what druids are in and what are out. BUT, and these are pretty big ones for me, the teamwork among the officers aren't working as far as decisions are concerned in most cases, we all come up with arguments but it's always two of them (one I'm ok with as he was the founder of the community and all) that make a decision and that's really frustrating as we kind of never really reach a conclusion to discussions (at least I don't, I usually still have things to say =b ). Another thing is that I'm an officer, but I'm constantly out of the loop and even though I'm the druid class leader I tend to not get any info (I had a druid who quit but I didn't get to know until three weeks later -.- ). Then there is this thing among the members of the community... A shitload of them are whiners and drama queens. Or know-it-alls who has no idea what they're talking about who try to tell me how to run the raid.
Seeing as I'm more or less never in for the loot when I raid (I mean, c'mon, it's just a bonus anyway), this seriously hurts my will to raid. I just can't join a raid knowing that after the first wipe people will start to whine and leave, as I personally see wiping as a motivator to try again. And the drama queens are usually the greedy people who "for the good of the community" wants to restrict loot to certain classes, make people respecc and yada yada you know the drill on good ol' fashioned "hardcore" raiding guilds. I've been there, done that and it sucks majorly. I'm just glad the founder isn't listening to that at least.
But all in all, 95% of the time I've raided with this community I've been either frustrated, angry or close to tears so I'll just say shove it and take a break. I'm going to write a nice little forum post too, see if people can take a hint. *plots*
On a little brighter note, I think I'm going to try my hand at the new CGChallenge at CGNetworks, it might restore some mojo if I kick my ass into actually taking it seriously this time and doing it. I even have a nice repertoire of roleplaying scenes to chose from here X)
I've lost about one month of it already, but I have almost one month to do it too, so it might work out if I start ASAP... Gives me something to do while David's out raiding =)
Oh, and for those who wanna see the progress, bookmark my thread! Though I might poke up some WIP piccies in here there will hopefully be more sketches and whatnot in that thread once I get rolling.
Found this link in steppinrazor's journal... And dayum o.o
You are feeling really miserable at this time and you'd like to form a relationship with someone with whom you could really communicate. Atthe same time, whoever it may be, that special 'someone' must not conflict with your own belief system or ideals. This makes for tough going - but it would seem that the situation is only transitory. It will soon pass.
Well, I'm miserable at the moment (somewhat anyway), and it would be a nice change of pace to have someone like-minded to just flip out with (deep discussions mixed with sheer sillieness FTW =) ), but I wouldn't say I need a new "special someone" I'm darn happy with David around *nods* No one can cheer me up like him being cute at me when I'm down!
You are very self-sufficient and methodical. You presume to know where you are going but need to find a person who will recognise the way you are, not be too demanding and who is, as they say in Italy, 'Simpatico'.
Somewhat true, though I sincerely do believe I'm not an easy person to be around being as oddball as I am... And my quirks aren't that easy to figure out >.> Though I must say David's well on his way, the only one who beats him at knowing my quirks right now is my mom and that's kinda as it should be, ne? ;)
At times all of us would like to be like the ostrich - to be able to bury our heads in the sand and let the rest of the world go by, but unfortunately you can't do just that - you have to face up to reality. A little peace and quiet would be most acceptable at this time but if only one could turn a blind eye to the problems of the day! Tomorrow is another day and who knows, it could be 'today' (not tomorrow) that could be the first day of the rest of your life!
That ostrich reference is so head on it's scary... That's exactly how I feel a lot of the times, I just wanna go hide somewhere and let the world pass by for a while. But then again, I've been extremely unbalanced the last year and a half, I guess it's somewhat related to moving away from home, getting a real good blackout in school (well I see my fleeing from school a year ago that way, I got stressed, my brain shut down and I panicked) and moving in with David in a 25m2 apartment (I'm a lonewolf, I ain't made for this! Not long term anyway >.> )
You are pretending that the situation around you doesn't matter, but the effort of trying to conceal your emotions and anxieties is resulting in untold stress. The existing situation is disagreeable. You feel unwanted and lonely and you would really like to associate with someone whose ideals are as high as your own. You want to be above the standard of mediocrity and this need to be needed and that need to need has almost become an obsession. You are trying to magnify the need into a compelling urge. You would really like to tell the world how great you
are but no, you are holding back because you feel that your peers may treat you with contempt. This is a great pity because you have in fact a unique quality of character, but the continual restraint that you impose on yourself makes you suppress this need for others and you pretend you don't really care. You treat those who criticise you with contempt. However, to be honest, beneath this assumption of indifference you really long for the approval and esteem of others.
This is... It's hard to admit it, but a lot of this is really true for me. I've always had a trouble with social situations so a lot of the time I'm not spending alone or with David I'm pretty uncomfortable. And I just absolutely hate going out to go buy groceries or whatever, I hate meeting people out on the town, it makes me all panic-y. And I do feel a little lonely even though I in no way feel unwanted (well, unless when I point out faults or are in general too truthful =b ). I know I'm well liked within WoW by a lot of people, I have David and my friends who like to have me along (at least I think so o.o; ) but still I feel lonely. Strangely that feeling goes away when I get to be on my own for a bit, but I guess it's the same phenomena that I always get a shitload of things done when I'm alone.
As for wanting to be above the standard.. I do, I really, really do, I want to be a somebody. I've always wanted that, I've always sought for other's approval and praise. I want to be in the spotlight, I always have. Sadly I'm a bit of a renaissance kind of person, meaning that if I can't do something on the first try I'll just give it up. The only thing that hasn't followed that would be the figure skating I used to do, as I'm clumsy as hell I still kept practicing. But I'm starting to think I'm like the druids in WoW, I'll never excell at any one thing, I'll keep being mediocre in many fields. It doesn't help I got the attention span of a gnat either.
You are greatly impressed by individuality and have interest in people who have outstanding qualities. You try to imitate those people that you admire and their characteristics, hoping that you will be able to display similar qualities in your own personality.
Again, very true. I absolutely adore people like ursulav, songblade and other artists who stand out, or anyone who dares to do their own thing really. I also love the "strong female heroine" type of characters, be it warrior ladies like Xena or fragile-who-turn-strong like Inoue from Bleach.
In general that was a rather interesting survey thingie... It got all that just by me choosing colors in order...
Seeing as I'm more or less never in for the loot when I raid (I mean, c'mon, it's just a bonus anyway), this seriously hurts my will to raid. I just can't join a raid knowing that after the first wipe people will start to whine and leave, as I personally see wiping as a motivator to try again. And the drama queens are usually the greedy people who "for the good of the community" wants to restrict loot to certain classes, make people respecc and yada yada you know the drill on good ol' fashioned "hardcore" raiding guilds. I've been there, done that and it sucks majorly. I'm just glad the founder isn't listening to that at least.
But all in all, 95% of the time I've raided with this community I've been either frustrated, angry or close to tears so I'll just say shove it and take a break. I'm going to write a nice little forum post too, see if people can take a hint. *plots*
On a little brighter note, I think I'm going to try my hand at the new CGChallenge at CGNetworks, it might restore some mojo if I kick my ass into actually taking it seriously this time and doing it. I even have a nice repertoire of roleplaying scenes to chose from here X)
I've lost about one month of it already, but I have almost one month to do it too, so it might work out if I start ASAP... Gives me something to do while David's out raiding =)
Oh, and for those who wanna see the progress, bookmark my thread! Though I might poke up some WIP piccies in here there will hopefully be more sketches and whatnot in that thread once I get rolling.
Found this link in steppinrazor's journal... And dayum o.o
You are feeling really miserable at this time and you'd like to form a relationship with someone with whom you could really communicate. Atthe same time, whoever it may be, that special 'someone' must not conflict with your own belief system or ideals. This makes for tough going - but it would seem that the situation is only transitory. It will soon pass.
Well, I'm miserable at the moment (somewhat anyway), and it would be a nice change of pace to have someone like-minded to just flip out with (deep discussions mixed with sheer sillieness FTW =) ), but I wouldn't say I need a new "special someone" I'm darn happy with David around *nods* No one can cheer me up like him being cute at me when I'm down!
You are very self-sufficient and methodical. You presume to know where you are going but need to find a person who will recognise the way you are, not be too demanding and who is, as they say in Italy, 'Simpatico'.
Somewhat true, though I sincerely do believe I'm not an easy person to be around being as oddball as I am... And my quirks aren't that easy to figure out >.> Though I must say David's well on his way, the only one who beats him at knowing my quirks right now is my mom and that's kinda as it should be, ne? ;)
At times all of us would like to be like the ostrich - to be able to bury our heads in the sand and let the rest of the world go by, but unfortunately you can't do just that - you have to face up to reality. A little peace and quiet would be most acceptable at this time but if only one could turn a blind eye to the problems of the day! Tomorrow is another day and who knows, it could be 'today' (not tomorrow) that could be the first day of the rest of your life!
That ostrich reference is so head on it's scary... That's exactly how I feel a lot of the times, I just wanna go hide somewhere and let the world pass by for a while. But then again, I've been extremely unbalanced the last year and a half, I guess it's somewhat related to moving away from home, getting a real good blackout in school (well I see my fleeing from school a year ago that way, I got stressed, my brain shut down and I panicked) and moving in with David in a 25m2 apartment (I'm a lonewolf, I ain't made for this! Not long term anyway >.> )
You are pretending that the situation around you doesn't matter, but the effort of trying to conceal your emotions and anxieties is resulting in untold stress. The existing situation is disagreeable. You feel unwanted and lonely and you would really like to associate with someone whose ideals are as high as your own. You want to be above the standard of mediocrity and this need to be needed and that need to need has almost become an obsession. You are trying to magnify the need into a compelling urge. You would really like to tell the world how great you
are but no, you are holding back because you feel that your peers may treat you with contempt. This is a great pity because you have in fact a unique quality of character, but the continual restraint that you impose on yourself makes you suppress this need for others and you pretend you don't really care. You treat those who criticise you with contempt. However, to be honest, beneath this assumption of indifference you really long for the approval and esteem of others.
This is... It's hard to admit it, but a lot of this is really true for me. I've always had a trouble with social situations so a lot of the time I'm not spending alone or with David I'm pretty uncomfortable. And I just absolutely hate going out to go buy groceries or whatever, I hate meeting people out on the town, it makes me all panic-y. And I do feel a little lonely even though I in no way feel unwanted (well, unless when I point out faults or are in general too truthful =b ). I know I'm well liked within WoW by a lot of people, I have David and my friends who like to have me along (at least I think so o.o; ) but still I feel lonely. Strangely that feeling goes away when I get to be on my own for a bit, but I guess it's the same phenomena that I always get a shitload of things done when I'm alone.
As for wanting to be above the standard.. I do, I really, really do, I want to be a somebody. I've always wanted that, I've always sought for other's approval and praise. I want to be in the spotlight, I always have. Sadly I'm a bit of a renaissance kind of person, meaning that if I can't do something on the first try I'll just give it up. The only thing that hasn't followed that would be the figure skating I used to do, as I'm clumsy as hell I still kept practicing. But I'm starting to think I'm like the druids in WoW, I'll never excell at any one thing, I'll keep being mediocre in many fields. It doesn't help I got the attention span of a gnat either.
You are greatly impressed by individuality and have interest in people who have outstanding qualities. You try to imitate those people that you admire and their characteristics, hoping that you will be able to display similar qualities in your own personality.
Again, very true. I absolutely adore people like ursulav, songblade and other artists who stand out, or anyone who dares to do their own thing really. I also love the "strong female heroine" type of characters, be it warrior ladies like Xena or fragile-who-turn-strong like Inoue from Bleach.
In general that was a rather interesting survey thingie... It got all that just by me choosing colors in order...