(no subject)
Today at work a regular that comes in everyday was wearing one of those Lance Armstrong yellow bracelette things. Have you seen those things? It's like a yellow rubberband and it says "LIVESTRONG" on it. Apparently it costs one dollar and all the money goes to cancer research, and they have sold millions of the little buggers. Lou (the regular customer) is telling me about it, and how his sister had cancer, his mom had cancer, and how now he gives a lot of money to cancer research. He asks me if I had a yellow bracelette rubber band thing if I would wear it, and I said, without thinking "sure". He proceeds to take one out of his pocket and hand it to me. I argue with him, and he says, "Take it I have a bunch".
Now here is the problem: do you think I pissed him off by taking it? I know it seems too Seinfeldian of a notion, but maybe he offerd it to be nice, and I took it when I should've refused it. Also, Lou comes in everyday, which means that I have to wear this thing EVERYDAY now. If he sees me without it he might be offended and take his business elsewhere. I am trapped, I can't take it off when I am not working because I will forget it, so here is sit, yellow bracelette rubber band thingie on my arm. I then almost cut my thumb off slicing lemons and get to go home early. I should've gotten a stitch.
I realized the other day that for the longest time in my life I have equated being "alone" or "single" with being sad, and that is really fucked up. There is something nice about being single, and it isn't as pathetic as I've made being "alone" out to be. It's not the rest of my life, and I can hook up with someone if that basic need in my body needs to be remedied. The one idea that I hate about this single self discovery thing is that sometimes I feel like the people (noone in particular) wear that as a badge, and that maybe there is a common ground, where I can take this time to get to know myself and figure my life out, and also still have someone to share my bed every once in a while, provided I realize that that is what I am looking for, not someone to come along and "fix" things somehow. Does that make any sense? Or am I being crazy?
Thanks for listening.
Now here is the problem: do you think I pissed him off by taking it? I know it seems too Seinfeldian of a notion, but maybe he offerd it to be nice, and I took it when I should've refused it. Also, Lou comes in everyday, which means that I have to wear this thing EVERYDAY now. If he sees me without it he might be offended and take his business elsewhere. I am trapped, I can't take it off when I am not working because I will forget it, so here is sit, yellow bracelette rubber band thingie on my arm. I then almost cut my thumb off slicing lemons and get to go home early. I should've gotten a stitch.
I realized the other day that for the longest time in my life I have equated being "alone" or "single" with being sad, and that is really fucked up. There is something nice about being single, and it isn't as pathetic as I've made being "alone" out to be. It's not the rest of my life, and I can hook up with someone if that basic need in my body needs to be remedied. The one idea that I hate about this single self discovery thing is that sometimes I feel like the people (noone in particular) wear that as a badge, and that maybe there is a common ground, where I can take this time to get to know myself and figure my life out, and also still have someone to share my bed every once in a while, provided I realize that that is what I am looking for, not someone to come along and "fix" things somehow. Does that make any sense? Or am I being crazy?
Thanks for listening.