Cupertino Effect
And so all of us in relationships ( with men of course ) would have no doubt at some point agreed with John Gray and applauded his brilliance for discovering that Women are from Venus and Men are from Mars and together they dwell on Earth. The real inhabitants of Earth then are those in no relationship with the opposite sex. That discovery of the true nativity of our gender at some point helps relieve the frustration of the relationship we are so eager to start and then so tired of trying to understand.
Now how great would it be if the Cupertino effect was extended, by a sweep of some celestial magic wand, ( well the sweep of a genius wand would suffice too) to our Venusian and Martian existence instead of being restricted to Microsoft applications or smart phone messages. Like how cool would it be if we could be forewarned before we made a predictive mistake. If you actually think about it we do make gender specific mistakes , all of us , in spite of knowing it subconsciously, in spite of having seen others make them , in spite of our better judgement. If only we had our own correction wand giving us an oral caution or a physical knock on the head before we went the wrong way.
So what are the mistakes we women wish we could quit. The things we do over and over again to the point of insanity and yet refuse to realize until the ouch factor comes into play and its too late to do anything. Until of course we get into the next relationship and start all over again. These are those turning points or staunch beliefs where I would personally like to have my correction wand ... telling me to auto correct.
1. Thinking that getting a boyfriend or a husband will solve all our problems for us. Knock 1 - No one can fix our lives for us. Period.
2. Waiting for someone to find us instead of going out there and finding someone for ourselves. Knock 2 The world out there is huge and so interesting ... get out there and explore and have some fun doing it too.
3. Dropping our friends when we find love. Knock 3 Ladies you need the Venusian in your life at every step of your journey. They define you and you need them when things get tough ... which they obviously will after the proverbial honeymoon.
4. Using the Silent Treatment. This one requires a double knock. He will be clueless about what's wrong unless we suck up and tell it to him. And no dropping hints don't work either. It has to be spelt out literally.
5. Thinking our partners must be interested in everything we do, think and say. Knock 5 When it comes down to it, we freak out when men talk about gadgets and rough sport right ? Having a best friend or gab partner outside a relationship is a better thing.
We are half way though ... and yes there are more ...
6. If you're mad at him because he ate your last piece of favorite chocolate carefully hidden in the fridge, tell him you're mad at him because he ate your last piece of favorite chocolate. If he offers you the last bit of your favorite food don't refuse it expecting he will insist you have it and then raise issues of commitment when he gulps it down. Freud got it right with this one. Knock 6 - communicate your pleasures and the lack of them even.
7. Checking his Facebook and Twitter activities or worse still Hacking into email or phone looking for suspicious messages and then yelling at him for the "k thnx bye" text he sent to his female co-worker two months ago. Knock 7 - Privacy and Individuality in relationships is a good thing and it works both ways . "k thnx" is not code for "hot steamy sex." (Is it?)
8. We grew up on fairy tales and happily ever afters. Putting so much energy into the idea of a fairy-tale romance that we're disappointed with anything less. Knock 8. Expecting a prince on a white horse to fill our lives with nothing but happiness isn't realistic. It take a lot of constant effort to get some sane levels of perfection in a relationship with a martian. Just thinking about it will not do.
9. Over-analyzing. There's analysis and then there's over-analysis. Wondering why the fiance didn't call once during his bachelor weekend in Vegas? A legitimate case for analysis. Wondering why he only called twice and not three times during a guys' night out? Not so much. Knock 9 There isn't much analysis to be done on this one.
10. Thinking we'll never get over him. Knoock 10. We will. Three months of movies and sad songs and several ( and I really mean SEVERAL ) powdered donuts later with our BFF ... we'll feel better. Its written ... Umm somewhere.
I also know there are a lot of mistakes the martians make and that I wish could be
auto corrected too. But perhaps I will keep that aside for another prompt.
Till then I shall continue to do what we women do best ... waiting ... waiting for things to start, things to happen , waiting for things to change , for things to pass , things to end .... WAIT ... or better still wait for the auto correct wand to knock its way into my life and stop the blundering.
( This is my attempt at tackling the prompt for Week 24 of Lj Idol - Cupertino Effect. I am submitting it for the home game - No pressures of surviving ... just expectations of some Concrits. They are always welcome you know. )
Now how great would it be if the Cupertino effect was extended, by a sweep of some celestial magic wand, ( well the sweep of a genius wand would suffice too) to our Venusian and Martian existence instead of being restricted to Microsoft applications or smart phone messages. Like how cool would it be if we could be forewarned before we made a predictive mistake. If you actually think about it we do make gender specific mistakes , all of us , in spite of knowing it subconsciously, in spite of having seen others make them , in spite of our better judgement. If only we had our own correction wand giving us an oral caution or a physical knock on the head before we went the wrong way.
So what are the mistakes we women wish we could quit. The things we do over and over again to the point of insanity and yet refuse to realize until the ouch factor comes into play and its too late to do anything. Until of course we get into the next relationship and start all over again. These are those turning points or staunch beliefs where I would personally like to have my correction wand ... telling me to auto correct.
1. Thinking that getting a boyfriend or a husband will solve all our problems for us. Knock 1 - No one can fix our lives for us. Period.
2. Waiting for someone to find us instead of going out there and finding someone for ourselves. Knock 2 The world out there is huge and so interesting ... get out there and explore and have some fun doing it too.
3. Dropping our friends when we find love. Knock 3 Ladies you need the Venusian in your life at every step of your journey. They define you and you need them when things get tough ... which they obviously will after the proverbial honeymoon.
4. Using the Silent Treatment. This one requires a double knock. He will be clueless about what's wrong unless we suck up and tell it to him. And no dropping hints don't work either. It has to be spelt out literally.
5. Thinking our partners must be interested in everything we do, think and say. Knock 5 When it comes down to it, we freak out when men talk about gadgets and rough sport right ? Having a best friend or gab partner outside a relationship is a better thing.
We are half way though ... and yes there are more ...
6. If you're mad at him because he ate your last piece of favorite chocolate carefully hidden in the fridge, tell him you're mad at him because he ate your last piece of favorite chocolate. If he offers you the last bit of your favorite food don't refuse it expecting he will insist you have it and then raise issues of commitment when he gulps it down. Freud got it right with this one. Knock 6 - communicate your pleasures and the lack of them even.
7. Checking his Facebook and Twitter activities or worse still Hacking into email or phone looking for suspicious messages and then yelling at him for the "k thnx bye" text he sent to his female co-worker two months ago. Knock 7 - Privacy and Individuality in relationships is a good thing and it works both ways . "k thnx" is not code for "hot steamy sex." (Is it?)
8. We grew up on fairy tales and happily ever afters. Putting so much energy into the idea of a fairy-tale romance that we're disappointed with anything less. Knock 8. Expecting a prince on a white horse to fill our lives with nothing but happiness isn't realistic. It take a lot of constant effort to get some sane levels of perfection in a relationship with a martian. Just thinking about it will not do.
9. Over-analyzing. There's analysis and then there's over-analysis. Wondering why the fiance didn't call once during his bachelor weekend in Vegas? A legitimate case for analysis. Wondering why he only called twice and not three times during a guys' night out? Not so much. Knock 9 There isn't much analysis to be done on this one.
10. Thinking we'll never get over him. Knoock 10. We will. Three months of movies and sad songs and several ( and I really mean SEVERAL ) powdered donuts later with our BFF ... we'll feel better. Its written ... Umm somewhere.
I also know there are a lot of mistakes the martians make and that I wish could be
auto corrected too. But perhaps I will keep that aside for another prompt.
Till then I shall continue to do what we women do best ... waiting ... waiting for things to start, things to happen , waiting for things to change , for things to pass , things to end .... WAIT ... or better still wait for the auto correct wand to knock its way into my life and stop the blundering.
( This is my attempt at tackling the prompt for Week 24 of Lj Idol - Cupertino Effect. I am submitting it for the home game - No pressures of surviving ... just expectations of some Concrits. They are always welcome you know. )