margaritas are lovebrought to you by the
isLove Generator omg, how fitting is that! i guess this thing works ;)
hmmm so i was reading glamour last night around 5 am when i couldn't fall asleep, and there was this whole section on the importance/benefits of sleep. so now i'm aiming to sleep more, but i am so used to staying up until 4 am, that i am not even tired now. there are many things i need to fix about myself, and my sleeping habits are definitely on that list. ps it is a long long list.
i am so happy to be back at uva. i think. well compared to being in manassas, i am infinitely happier here. i feel like i spent a lot of thanksgiving break waiting to return to charlottesville so i could get back to life. i did have a few very happy times, specifically when i was with my 'real' family [meredith's] & my other half and when i got to see lovenugget & nicka & sunny too. but i spent most of saturday unhappy in my house, wondering if i would actually be happier when i returned to uva, or if home had ruined my mood permanently. luckily, when i came back uva was just as i left it, which is better than home. but it's still not as good as it has been - i miss the beginning of this semester. everything seemed so optimistic then, and none of this crazy drama had happened. it feels like life made a lot more sense then. now i just don't really think about what goes on in my life, i also pretend i lack control over it, because it should be easier that way. but not dealing with these things may have affected me even more. i'm worried that i have become a self-destructive person.... it's difficult to explain, but i feel like if someone were to view my behavior from an outside perspective, they would be especially critical of it. ehhh. maybe i am too tough on myself, this is why i don't think about things ;)
anyways, i think i may make a list of all the studying/work that i need to do this week and get on that. hot hot library date tomorrow! it's about time i make my full return to clemons!