i've had you so many times, but somehow i want more
so i've had this 7 page paper to do for quite awhile now, and i'm finally getting to it tonight. and so it's 4 am and i've only answered 2 of the 7 questions that i need to in this essay.... i'm not feeling too good about it right now. ps everyone out there [winnie] who can write amazing, long papers overnight, you are incredible. i hate writing so bad. hence why ap lang was the worst class in the world for me. but i really need to finish this tonight so i don't have to deal with it tomorrow.
i can't believe last time i wrote was after formal last saturday night, that seems like an eternity ago. i've put myself through a lot of crap over the past week and a half since then.... i had mood swings to the max last week, and i don't even understand it. i'm blaming it on the fact that i have no personal space, and i've had so much bothering me lately that i feel i can't talk to anyone @ uva about it constantly. and my friends outside of uva are all so busy that i can't call them and throw my problems at them every 2 seconds.... so some of my problems are kind of spread out among my friends and i'm still so confused about things. and i'm so so worried about finals. i feel like i've fucked up a lot this semester, not even just with classes, but with anything i possibly could. wow this entry sounds way more depressing that it feels. i'm just totally frustrated with myself for being so irresponsible and letting my life turn into such a mess. i ended up breaking down and sobbing for at least half an hour when i came home from foxfields on saturday, then saturday night i went out for a bit and was in such a good mood, then sunday i was totally down again. i think i've been taking things too personally lately, as well. and there's so much pressure with this year coming to an end, and returning home. i mean, what do i have to show for this past year? um, absolutely nothing positive aside from the tan i have acquired since spring break. well and joining sigma kappa. i was doing so well with life the first semester of school, or so i thought, and it's just been downhill since then, especially this semester. but hey, i've definitely learned from my mistakes, although that doesn't mean i won't keep making them.
i can't believe last time i wrote was after formal last saturday night, that seems like an eternity ago. i've put myself through a lot of crap over the past week and a half since then.... i had mood swings to the max last week, and i don't even understand it. i'm blaming it on the fact that i have no personal space, and i've had so much bothering me lately that i feel i can't talk to anyone @ uva about it constantly. and my friends outside of uva are all so busy that i can't call them and throw my problems at them every 2 seconds.... so some of my problems are kind of spread out among my friends and i'm still so confused about things. and i'm so so worried about finals. i feel like i've fucked up a lot this semester, not even just with classes, but with anything i possibly could. wow this entry sounds way more depressing that it feels. i'm just totally frustrated with myself for being so irresponsible and letting my life turn into such a mess. i ended up breaking down and sobbing for at least half an hour when i came home from foxfields on saturday, then saturday night i went out for a bit and was in such a good mood, then sunday i was totally down again. i think i've been taking things too personally lately, as well. and there's so much pressure with this year coming to an end, and returning home. i mean, what do i have to show for this past year? um, absolutely nothing positive aside from the tan i have acquired since spring break. well and joining sigma kappa. i was doing so well with life the first semester of school, or so i thought, and it's just been downhill since then, especially this semester. but hey, i've definitely learned from my mistakes, although that doesn't mean i won't keep making them.