... and it's going to spill out here. Sorry.
So. You know what? I'm still so fucking angry about everything i don't know if i'm going to make much sense. Bear with me, please.
I work a shitty, crappy part time job as a cleaner. I feel pretty fucking miserable a lot of the time because i'm cleaning up after people with lower IQ's and less qualifications and yet still somehow need to feel fucking grateful (ty
wererogue, see, i can remember! =D) that i have a job at all. Which fucking sucks because it's fucking hard to feel fucking grateful when you're fucking miserable. Fuck.
There're 2 floors to the office i clean. I clean all the offices on the second floor. Another girl does the 3rd floor (yeah, i know, but the ground floor is just an entrance way afaik and the first and 4th floors aren't in use). Her floor consists of male and female toilets, small kitchen, corridor (which she doesn't do properly...) and 2 offices, which only get done 2 nights a week (well, one gets bins emptied and cups washed up every night, but hoovering and wiping down only twice a week). Doesn't take more than 1 1/2hrs.
My floor consists of male/female toilets, large kitchen, corridor, reception area and 32 offices which need doing every night. I think you may see where this is going. We're both paid to be there for 2 1/2 hrs. In the time i've been there, we're now on the 3rd girl cleaning other floor, and none of them have bothered to help out on mine the way that my boss assures me they're meant to. Last night, had a go at current girl about this (who's lovely and i felt quite guilty about it) and she said boss told her she was only meant to be doing 3rd floor and that when she has helped out on my floor it's been from the fact she likes me rather than because she's meant to.
I'd text my boss earlier in the evening to let him know what products we were out of. He text me back to let me know he'd bring them in tomorrow (so, today). I replied to say thanks and that i hadn't seen the other girl. Text her to ask where she was. Checked her floor - she'd been in and done it. Received text from her to say as much. Rant to her ensues. Text boss back to let him know. Reply from her stating that she's not meant to do my floor. Reply apologising for my anger and explaining boss has been telling us different things. Phone call (unanswered) to boss - livid voice mail left. Text him once i'd been there about 5min more than i'm paid to explain what still needed doing and that i was going home. If he'd fucking answered his phone or replied to a single text, i'd probably have stayed and done it, but if he can't even be fucking bothered to do that... Makes me pretty angry. Anyway, not heard from him since. I was so close to telling him to shove his job. if only money weren't an issue :(
I don't like being this angry. I got worked up monday cos she'd gone home without telling me or doing anyting on my floor and then again last night. Guess at least i know why she's been doing so :(
It's kind of a melancholy anger. I mean, at work it's been pure frustration anger, but now i'm still angry but it's tinged with melancholy.
And it really sucks cos Al's mum and i had a lovely day together yesterday, absolutely marred by my crappy job. I can feel the tension of it invading my legs, arms, back, neck, jaw and scalp. I know i should just find a new job but it's fucking hard when you feel like this. I didn't want to get out of bed this morning, i really had to force myself. Everything feels pretty crappy right now!