FIC: Interlude on the TARDIS, Tenth Doctor/Captain Jack Harkness, NC-17

[missviolet]

I’m afraid my f-list will be disappointed that my latest fic is not a House/Wilson. During the hiatus, I became an ardent Doctor Who fan, and this story is about the Tenth Doctor, played by adorkable David Tennant, and Captain Jack Harkness, played by gorgeous John Barrowman. I’m feeling dirty about writing this story, as Doctor Who is a family

Comments

[slaughterchichi]

I found the constant usage of the word 'prick' very distracting and awkward. As I don't really like the word itself, when you'd used it for the fifth time or so, I nearly stopped reading. What I noticed is that when you're using a particular word, you use it a few times in a row, though you know others.

The rest of it was quite good though; if you'd used more varied words I would be tempted to call this perfect.

The way the Doctor seduced Jack was amusing and quite clever. That kiss of theirs has been one that I'm sure Jack remembers well-- obviously the Doctor couldn't get it out of his mind either ;) Oh yeah, I just want to point out that whilst the Doctor fancying Jack is not explicitly shown, it doesn't necessarily mean that he doesn't find him attractive. Jack fancying the Doctor, however, is pretty much canon. In Torchwood, when Gwen asks him who he loves, he mentions that Doctor, and also in series 3 of Doctor Who, when the Doctor explains to Martha that it was like 'if you fancied someone and they didn't know you existed', Jack looked at her downtrodden expression and said "You too?" Hehe. That's canon in my book!

Back to the fic... I really liked how you mentioned the Doctor tasting things often, because he really does, and it's a cute and cheeky aspect of the tenth doctor that I enjoy. I also liked the end; insatiable Doctor is amusing and easily justified, and generally just fun to read. Jack also likes to wait things out and get his answers, being left behind in series 1 and catching up in series 3 proves it.

Your characterisations were really nicely done and your writing style is good, except for that one thing I mentioned earlier. Sorry I had to start on a negative, but it was the first thing I noticed and I always like to end things on a positive note :) For your FIRST Doctor Who fic, I think this was pretty damn amazing. Do not stop writing it; you're very good!

(P.S. Sorry for the freakishly long comment X_X Couldn't help myself)

[missviolet]

Well, that's okay. I could always use the criticism, and most people don't take the time or else they are not always as frank as you. I understand you don't like the word 'prick' but that's one of the biggest challenges of writing porn, running out of words to describe the human body and the act of sex. Everyone's got different triggers - I don't like the word 'dick' which some would argue is preferable to 'prick' but to each their own. However, I think that the number of words any individual finds acceptable for sex organs and the act itself are very few. We all have our squicks, I guess is what I am trying to say, and you can't please everyone.

To me, 'prick' and 'cock', being old-fashioned, are the only acceptable terms for the male appendage and anything else is likely to make me hit the Back button. So I totally sympathize with your aversion to 'prick,' but with only two words that I can bear to use, it's a challenge, likewise for words like 'moaned' which I've looked up in the thesaurus many times but there's so few words that sound right to me.

Thanks for the compliments, I do expect to write another Doctor Who or Torchwood fic, after I finish a House fic I've been working on for ages.

[missviolet]

Well, thanks. It's just a personal thing. Some people don't like it, others are okay with it. I can't deal with 'dick' or 'member' or 'manhood' or even 'penis.' And that's only the words for the male sexual organs that I can't stand. The list goes on and on... everything from 'pre-come' to 'keened,' is part of my list of unacceptable words that make me hit the Back button.

There's just no way to please everyone. I use 'cock' and 'prick' because at one time, they were not considered particularly dirty words, no more so than our modern interpretation of 'penis.' Whereas words like 'dick' were always considered dirty and I think they lack the sweetness that I aim for in my fics.

But thanks for weighing in! I understand the commenter's objection to the term, but if I use only 'cock,' I'd certainly get some feedback along the lines of 'why do you keep using the same word over and over?' I spend so much time with the thesaurus and with my book of sexual slang, I really do try to diversify, but it's like one of my English professors told me: don't use 'perambulate' instead of 'walked' merely to avoid being repetitive. In matters of style, using awkward, obscure language is worse than being repetitive.