I think i'm moving but I go nowhere
Maybe I shouldn't be consumed with anything but God. Actually, I definitely shouldn't be. That's why I wish I had no emotions. I wish I was like a guy and have the ability to separate my heart from my head. I do wish I could feel nothing but God. I truly, truly do. Maybe then, my journal entries wouldn't be half God-half emotions.
If we say we love the Lord, we will be tested as to how much we love Him. Sort of a trust-test. There is no such thing as trusting God without unanswered questions. As long as God is training us to trust Him, there are going to be things that we just plain don't understand. "Why?" "When?" "How?" It's frustrating sometimes, but tomorrow's answers don't usually come until tomorrow. When I can't hear from God about something, (which seems to be pretty common lately) I am learning that I need to stay busy doing that last thing God told me to do and just keep trusting Him. I need to spend less time simply seeking God's will for my life and more time seeking HIM. Knowing HIM. One day at a time. One trial at a time. One answer at a time.
Jesus bore our sins so that we do not have to bear them. But there are other things He went through that He endured as an example for us, things that we will have to follow in His footsteps and go through as well. Jesus got completely betrayed by Judas. Talk about backstabbing. Satan seems to love betrayal because when we get hurt by someone we love or trust, it makes us feel like we can't trust anyone. Including the Lord, to some extent. Jesus forgives. No exceptions. I can't say that I want to be like Him in every way if I don't forgive as well. :)
I am almost done reading an amazing book. It's called "Knowing God" by J.I. Packer. It's pretty intense, and not really an easy read. I have been reading it over the course of 3 months or so. It's a great combination of doctrine and commentary and has shed alot of light on who God is. I have never been so encouraged to seek Him before. There is so much to learn about Him and His character. That's all that really matters. If we know and love God, we will know how to love others the way He wants us to. What else were we created for? Last weekend TJ and I were talking about how pointless life is when we lose perspective of our purpose here on earth. Is our purpose just to make ourselves happy? To live life oblivious to everything but our own lives and get completely thrown off when one little thing doesn't go as planned? No way. One of my professors constantly reminds us that we has humans are "insignificant" to the universe and are nothing but "star dust". What a depressing way to exist.
Anyways, I'm just rambling. It's late and I have a whole lot of studying to do.
If we say we love the Lord, we will be tested as to how much we love Him. Sort of a trust-test. There is no such thing as trusting God without unanswered questions. As long as God is training us to trust Him, there are going to be things that we just plain don't understand. "Why?" "When?" "How?" It's frustrating sometimes, but tomorrow's answers don't usually come until tomorrow. When I can't hear from God about something, (which seems to be pretty common lately) I am learning that I need to stay busy doing that last thing God told me to do and just keep trusting Him. I need to spend less time simply seeking God's will for my life and more time seeking HIM. Knowing HIM. One day at a time. One trial at a time. One answer at a time.
Jesus bore our sins so that we do not have to bear them. But there are other things He went through that He endured as an example for us, things that we will have to follow in His footsteps and go through as well. Jesus got completely betrayed by Judas. Talk about backstabbing. Satan seems to love betrayal because when we get hurt by someone we love or trust, it makes us feel like we can't trust anyone. Including the Lord, to some extent. Jesus forgives. No exceptions. I can't say that I want to be like Him in every way if I don't forgive as well. :)
I am almost done reading an amazing book. It's called "Knowing God" by J.I. Packer. It's pretty intense, and not really an easy read. I have been reading it over the course of 3 months or so. It's a great combination of doctrine and commentary and has shed alot of light on who God is. I have never been so encouraged to seek Him before. There is so much to learn about Him and His character. That's all that really matters. If we know and love God, we will know how to love others the way He wants us to. What else were we created for? Last weekend TJ and I were talking about how pointless life is when we lose perspective of our purpose here on earth. Is our purpose just to make ourselves happy? To live life oblivious to everything but our own lives and get completely thrown off when one little thing doesn't go as planned? No way. One of my professors constantly reminds us that we has humans are "insignificant" to the universe and are nothing but "star dust". What a depressing way to exist.
Anyways, I'm just rambling. It's late and I have a whole lot of studying to do.