(no subject)

[missrungakutta]

so i do it and i don't even mean it. it's as if i were sara and the accent just flowed naturally. and it doesn't make any sense, i mean, i hate it right? and i just do it anyway. i mean, i waited so long and it never happened and so i read cosmo and am told to give up so i do and then i know this is bad but it's okay anyway. but it's my birthday soon and good things are too come, at 3am, you know, but i don't care, i fuck it all up and now i'm stuck with this again and still, the best words i can hear come from her mouth and it's like "by the way, dude, he totally wants to fuck you" and i don't want to fuck him, but i pretend it's okay anyway just because i'm bored and there's no one around and it's fun, to be able to have that power, even though it's no power really, and so i charge my food, and hers alike, and get the fuck out of there before i compromise myself and then i come home alone to do this again, and so i get on the internet and there it all goes down. down down down. there are fake brits on my porch and horny guys i'm not about to give the time of day (or night) to and i just wish things weren't this way and i weren't going to have a pillow tonight, but you know, i don't really think i could take it any other way and am better off. yes, i'm better off. but fuck, what have i got myself into. i hate me. but that's not true. you know it's not. there's no sex involved.

where in the fuck is my email?

twin peaks.