Running from lions
So alot of good things got done today... I finally:
-Started filling out the paperwork for insuring Ivy.
-I found a hauler that will move her
-I sent the copy of my transcript to Lake Erie
-I heard back from Fox Creek Stables and it went really well... I think I'm going to get to be a real instuctor!
-I called my dad and it didn't go horribly
-I got the cranberry juice out of my white tank top
-I ate healthy all day
-I went with Carrie and talked to United and Elaine didn't kill us with lasers on the spot
...& yet still this ick. I know that I'm going down state tomorrow. I can't not go. I also know that it's not going to change anything... he loves this girl. If he didn't they wouldn't have been together for 10 months. Brandon and I are over. It's really done now and that's the part that I'm the most upset about. I'd been holding on to him for so long that I didn't even realize that I was doing it anymore. But I was.
I can't not go.
I hate him so much for doing this to me. I thought he couldn't hurt me any worse than he did when we broke up. I was wrong... this is worse. I hate that it's been so long. I hate that I am so sad that I can't even be happy about all the good things that are happening to me right now. I hate him so much.
So why can't I let him go?
-Started filling out the paperwork for insuring Ivy.
-I found a hauler that will move her
-I sent the copy of my transcript to Lake Erie
-I heard back from Fox Creek Stables and it went really well... I think I'm going to get to be a real instuctor!
-I called my dad and it didn't go horribly
-I got the cranberry juice out of my white tank top
-I ate healthy all day
-I went with Carrie and talked to United and Elaine didn't kill us with lasers on the spot
...& yet still this ick. I know that I'm going down state tomorrow. I can't not go. I also know that it's not going to change anything... he loves this girl. If he didn't they wouldn't have been together for 10 months. Brandon and I are over. It's really done now and that's the part that I'm the most upset about. I'd been holding on to him for so long that I didn't even realize that I was doing it anymore. But I was.
I can't not go.
I hate him so much for doing this to me. I thought he couldn't hurt me any worse than he did when we broke up. I was wrong... this is worse. I hate that it's been so long. I hate that I am so sad that I can't even be happy about all the good things that are happening to me right now. I hate him so much.
So why can't I let him go?