Love...
I don't write much anymore but sometimes things are just on my mind and I need a place to get them out. Maybe it's the romance I just watch (well I know that's what's bringing this out) but I can't deal with the feelings. I need to get real I'm not with him it's not real. I have superficial relationships everywhere but one real honest something. what that something is I can't seem to place I've always just said love but hey maybe it's all BS. What I know is I miss everything about it. Words and talk can't make up for being in someones arms. I'm counting down the next 2 weeks. It will have been about a month then so I guess that's about the right amount of time. The idea of only 12 visits in 12 months makes me hurt inside. I want time to pass quicker so I distract myself with god knows what which will probably get me in trouble or pregnat (but I guess that's trouble). I just want my life back not this game I've been playing the last month. I thought it was the right decision and maybe it was but I wish it didn't have to last a year because in less then a month I'm already breaking down.