Real Life Steps In
Okay...This sucks. I hate life, I hate this age I am. I try to make friends with people, but every guy I make friends with, I start to fall for. And I don't want to. Because I don't want to be hurt like I was this summer. Each time I get a crush on someone, they get stronger. The last one was the first time I'd ever felt jealous, the first time I listened to a love song and thought of a person instead of a pairing from some fandom, the first time I cried over a guy. And I'm positive this time it will be worse. One is, I think, still in love with someone else and the other has a girlfriend that he's crazy about. I want to keep my heart safe, but I don't know how. And besides, even if they were free, why the fuck would they like me?
I'm getting depressed again, and I don't want to be. Because I put up walls hoping someone will care enough to notice and break them down and no one ever does. *sigh*