this yesterday
yesterday was fun-filled no sleep
but for about an hour i sat and just didn't talk
i wanted to talk
but i didn't because there was no point.
it suddenly hit me that maybe each moment isn't filled with value
i'm wondering sometimes why God gave us this world as such a test -
it's all just so frustrating trying to find meaning in a world of meaningless things.
everything is fake
God created this fake world as a test
everywhere is a joke something
get it?
i do
finally
but here's the deal:
how does a cat like me climb that tree and understand what's going down in this fake joke world?
i don't belong here
it's obvious
so i'm just resolving to give myself away
i am going to put everything that i possibly can into serving others.
if i can live through the goodness of my actions
and maybe exist there
i can find a reality of goodness
a reality of separation from the reality
a reality in everybody and somebody
in faith
and who cares if i don't make sense?
just let me mess up and mess up and mess up until i finally finally get it right
ok friends
just let me mess up
let me keep messing up
please
because i learn so much more about what i've done wrong when i mess up
and that's why i got mad when we were parallel parking
because i just wanted you all to let me mess up and learn to park right
hopefully you'll all understand
also, i can't stand big drunken frat guys
especially in ann arbor
since they're the ones that always rub in your face how bad of a school state is simply because we offer agricultural courses and don't have as many people wearing our t-shirts or with our school symbol on their license plate
they can have their ho's
seriously, that's all drunken frat guys get: the ho's
it's the little artsy kids or the normal guys that get the really really great girls that actually care about life, learning and changing things
i guess i should feel bad for the frat guys, doomed to horrible relationships for all of college. i would feel bad for them if they would just let me mess up and go to state
finally, to end this huge ol' rant
i keep giving up on women then falling for these awesome girls that i can't be with
or maybe that i can be with but am too scared to try to be with
i lose my heart so easily
but i'm apprehensive this time
because she's just a girl
a girl who i hardly know
and megan's crazy away message is always in my head:
love love is not pretending
time time was meant for mending
and i'm happy
because i get to go play soccer
and i love soccer
and i want to do a photo project on close-ups of women's eyes
and ca, ca c'est la vie, mes amis
ca c'est la fin
but for about an hour i sat and just didn't talk
i wanted to talk
but i didn't because there was no point.
it suddenly hit me that maybe each moment isn't filled with value
i'm wondering sometimes why God gave us this world as such a test -
it's all just so frustrating trying to find meaning in a world of meaningless things.
everything is fake
God created this fake world as a test
everywhere is a joke something
get it?
i do
finally
but here's the deal:
how does a cat like me climb that tree and understand what's going down in this fake joke world?
i don't belong here
it's obvious
so i'm just resolving to give myself away
i am going to put everything that i possibly can into serving others.
if i can live through the goodness of my actions
and maybe exist there
i can find a reality of goodness
a reality of separation from the reality
a reality in everybody and somebody
in faith
and who cares if i don't make sense?
just let me mess up and mess up and mess up until i finally finally get it right
ok friends
just let me mess up
let me keep messing up
please
because i learn so much more about what i've done wrong when i mess up
and that's why i got mad when we were parallel parking
because i just wanted you all to let me mess up and learn to park right
hopefully you'll all understand
also, i can't stand big drunken frat guys
especially in ann arbor
since they're the ones that always rub in your face how bad of a school state is simply because we offer agricultural courses and don't have as many people wearing our t-shirts or with our school symbol on their license plate
they can have their ho's
seriously, that's all drunken frat guys get: the ho's
it's the little artsy kids or the normal guys that get the really really great girls that actually care about life, learning and changing things
i guess i should feel bad for the frat guys, doomed to horrible relationships for all of college. i would feel bad for them if they would just let me mess up and go to state
finally, to end this huge ol' rant
i keep giving up on women then falling for these awesome girls that i can't be with
or maybe that i can be with but am too scared to try to be with
i lose my heart so easily
but i'm apprehensive this time
because she's just a girl
a girl who i hardly know
and megan's crazy away message is always in my head:
love love is not pretending
time time was meant for mending
and i'm happy
because i get to go play soccer
and i love soccer
and i want to do a photo project on close-ups of women's eyes
and ca, ca c'est la vie, mes amis
ca c'est la fin