(no subject)
So many bad things have been going on - and no I'm not just talking about some stupid boy. About a week before finals things got extremely bad. If I wouldn't have met this person at the end of that week and had him to take the focus off of everything, who knows what might've happened. Well now that I'm alone, everything that was going through my mind then is coming back again. All I want to do is sleep. Sleeping has always sort of been my way of dealing with things. When you're asleep you don't have to feel anything. It's like everything just goes away. I can go away. But I can't sleep forever.
Tomorrow I'm going to church. I really want to find a church down here but I REALLY like Central at home. I might end up driving home tomorrow just for that reason because I really feel like that's where I need to be. Monday is gonna be a BIG day for me. Please keep me in your prayers. I have also decided to change my major- sorta last minute thing... It's very stressful, but I'll be happier in the end I think. Wednesday Megan, Julie, and I are taking a trip to Evansville to go watch the Carbondale game. This trip is more than that for me though. I haven't been there in a year. After everything happened, I refused to go back. I guess sometimes my way of dealing with things is simply not dealing. That place holds sooo many memories, both good and bad. In a way I'm sort of excited. Yen Ching, Penny Lane, The Ohio River... I want to go to the Casino for the hell of it, but my friends aren't 21 yet. I also want to stop by Abercrombie. They remodeled it a while back. I want to drive out to USI too and see the new stuff they've built.
I just hope during this next week things start to get better. I don't think it's really possible for things to get any worse but I guess we'll see.
"I can't do anything without You
You give me strength to do anything
I can't be everything I try to
You saved me from the everything
I couldn't be
It doesn't mean anything
Without You here with me
'Cause after all is said and done
I still need You here with me"
Tomorrow I'm going to church. I really want to find a church down here but I REALLY like Central at home. I might end up driving home tomorrow just for that reason because I really feel like that's where I need to be. Monday is gonna be a BIG day for me. Please keep me in your prayers. I have also decided to change my major- sorta last minute thing... It's very stressful, but I'll be happier in the end I think. Wednesday Megan, Julie, and I are taking a trip to Evansville to go watch the Carbondale game. This trip is more than that for me though. I haven't been there in a year. After everything happened, I refused to go back. I guess sometimes my way of dealing with things is simply not dealing. That place holds sooo many memories, both good and bad. In a way I'm sort of excited. Yen Ching, Penny Lane, The Ohio River... I want to go to the Casino for the hell of it, but my friends aren't 21 yet. I also want to stop by Abercrombie. They remodeled it a while back. I want to drive out to USI too and see the new stuff they've built.
I just hope during this next week things start to get better. I don't think it's really possible for things to get any worse but I guess we'll see.
"I can't do anything without You
You give me strength to do anything
I can't be everything I try to
You saved me from the everything
I couldn't be
It doesn't mean anything
Without You here with me
'Cause after all is said and done
I still need You here with me"