Glee Fic: The Swiss Army Relations
Title: The Swiss Army Relations
Characters/Pairings: Blaine, Cooper; Blaine/Kurt
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers/Warnings: through 3x15; language, mention of violence
Word Count: ~2,300
Summary: The Swiss Army knife is an Anderson tradition that reeks of masculine stereotyping and impersonal, familial obligation.
A/N: Thank you xsaturated for helping me out with the direction of this fic because I was a mess about it.
The Swiss Army Relations
The night before Blaine is about to head off to his first camping trip with his Boy Scout troop, his father hands him a small box. He didn't bother to wrap it, the box black with a silver crest with a plus sign in it.
"It's a Swiss Army knife," his father explains once Blaine pulls it out, confused by the red…thing. How is it a knife? "My father gave me one when I first joined the Boy Scouts."
He then spends the next half hour showing him how to pull out all the tools - there are only seven since it's the classic model, but father trusts him with it.
Frankly, Blaine is terrified of it. He's scared of accidentally stabbing himself with the knife or cutting his fingers off, so he doesn't use it, but he always carries it with him on camping trips. It makes him feel older and simultaneously protected, that maybe some of his father's strength will seep from the plastic and metal of the knife into his skin and become part of him. It makes him feel loved.
*
"Oh yeah, Dad gave me one too when I was your age, whatever. Hm, I wonder where mine is - might've lost it at a party. So - wanna hear the cool stuff I'm doing in LA?"
Blaine grips the house phone tightly, tears filling his eyes and he can't bring himself to answer Cooper because for a stupid second, he had hoped his father was giving him something special, something to Blaine that he didn't give to Cooper for whatever reason.
"Well, I can't tell you everything since you're not old enough, Blainey, but -"
Blaine slowly turns the Swiss army knife in his hands as he listens to Cooper talk about what a star he is, how special he is in the big city and Blaine can't feel any smaller than he does now (but that always tends to happen when he speaks with him).
*
Blaine is thirteen, almost fourteen when he quits Boy Scouts, unable to handle the way most of his troop is treating him. He just tells his parents he wants to focus on his academics once he starts high school.
The Swiss Army knife is placed in his nightstand drawer, hardly touched after that.
At least until a few weeks into freshman year, when the bullying gets worse and he starts carrying it with him. Just in case. He feels silly for doing so, especially since most of the time he forgets it's in his backpack, but sometimes when he's on the receiving glare that can't be describe as anything other than murderous, he feels better just knowing he has it.
*
Sometimes he wondered if it all would've turned out differently if he didn't trust his peers as much as he did that night, leaving his knife at home because who's going to pay attention to him and his friend - shouldn't they be busy dancing and having fun?
(How was he supposed to know that some of their definition of 'fun' involved beating two freshmen in the parking lot, trying to see if they could mix blood, cement, and snow like paints on a canvas?)
*
As soon as he's released from the hospital and brought home, he goes into his nightstand drawer, takes the Swiss Army knife that's been mocking him for the two weeks he's been in the hospital, and throws it away. He can't bring himself to feel sorry for throwing away one of the few personal gifts his father ever gave him when he can barely look Blaine in the eye now.
*
He transfers to Dalton and he forgets about previously owning a pocket knife until Cooper comes to visit for Christmas, his gift being a Swiss Army knife, but instead of the classic red one his father gave him, he's given a plaid-printed one with blues and pinks and greens.
"I know you threw yours out after what happened and every Anderson should have a Swiss Army knife - it's tradition. But I think this fits you more," Cooper says as Blaine continues to stare blankly at the gift.
He doesn't know whether to be touched, upset, or angry.
"It's supposed to be a father-son thing," Blaine finally says in a quiet voice, picking the knife out of the box to turn it over between his fingers.
"Well, you know me, I like to fuck tradition now and again, but I rather like this one in our family," Cooper answers with a wink and a grin, even though there's something sober in his eyes that makes Blaine take him seriously.
"Didn't you lose yours? That's what you said when I first told you."
Cooper smiles, shaking his head. "I thought I did - I found it in my room when you were in the hospital, actually." He reaches into the pocket of his leather jacket and pulls out a red Swiss Army knife that's scratched and old. Blaine wonders if he uses it now - if he only uses one of the tools or just carries it around for sentimentality.
Blaine doesn't ask.
"So, are you going to keep it or throw it out?"
Blaine looks down at the knife, a nasty part of him wanting to tell Cooper to take it back, claiming that this isn't thoughtful or personal at all - the Swiss Army knife is an Anderson tradition that reeks of masculine stereotyping and impersonal, familial obligation.
But. The knife in his hands has every color in the rainbow for the most part and oh, maybe Cooper is sharper than Blaine gives him credit for.
(They both have that in common.)
Blaine curls the Swiss Army knife into his palm and smiles at Cooper. "I'll keep it. Thank you."
Cooper beams. "Jolly good!"
Blaine rolls his eyes, but the smile stays in place.
*
He doesn't catch any crap at Dalton for having a Swiss Army knife with its plaid print. And honestly, it's lost a lot of its original meaning to him. Now it's just a thing he carries around because he's a former Boy Scout and "always be prepared" is something that's synonymous with him.
It feels like such a lie sometimes.
*
At one point, Blaine does research about Swiss Army knives - how they came to be (first produced in 1891 for the Swiss military; coined by U.S. soldiers after World War II) and the type of men that owned them.
(Apparently military service is mandatory in Switzerland once a boy turns eighteen. Receiving a Swiss Army knife from the military becomes sort of a symbol of coming of age and it disturbs him how his father essentially wanted his kids to grow up that fast and so help him, that early father-son tradition is dying with him.)
*
He tells Kurt about the Swiss Army Anderson tradition when he uses the knife's small pair of scissors to help Kurt cut a loose thread from knitted sweater, a few weeks after they start dating. He mentions his first knife and how he threw it out - he gives no explanation and Kurt doesn't prod - and how his brother gave him this one.
It's scary, revealing a tradition that's so personal to his family to someone else, and maybe in the future he'll tell him that it became something to clutch in his pocket during those really bad days in public school, the fact that he threw it away was because the one time he didn't act like a Boy Scout, he got a broken left wrist ("If you're right-handed, why do you wear your watch on your right hand?"), a concussion that left him incapable of doing anything for so long ("Wait, if we're the same age, how are you in the grade below me?"), and other injuries that left scars on his body and mind.
(He still wakes up from nightmares now and again and he thought 'mind over matter' was a legitimate concept.)
But for now, he just holds Kurt and he wonders how much Kurt can hear his heart pounding in his chest, if he can feel it at all.
*
As soon as he hikes up his trousers the night of prom, he pockets the Swiss Army knife. And a pack of tissues.
Always be prepared.
*
He almost tells Kurt about what else he's been carrying in his pockets after they leave prom and arrive at Kurt's house, but Kurt is hugging Blaine so tightly, shoulders shaking as he apologizes and cries all over again and Blaine can't do that to him; Kurt doesn't need to feel pain from Blaine's end too.
*
He finally gets his chance at one of Brittany's pool parties. Kurt was searching through Blaine's shorts for a pack of tissues he normally carries when he finds the Swiss Army knife instead.
"Blaine…can you come here for a second?"
Blaine climbs out of the pool, his stomach squirming when he catches Kurt looking at him, temporarily distracted.
Kurt pulls Blaine inside and asks why he's carrying his Swiss Army knife to a pool party and Kurt just knows that it's something more than just a force of habit when he carries a pill case with prescription pain killers in his pocket just in case and is wearing a tank top in a pool, despite the fact that the wet fabric is clinging to Blaine's abs, revealing little to no fat.
So Blaine's honest - it's not just a handy tool for him and it's more than a gift from his brother (whom he still refuses to really talk about).
Kurt has his quick wit, cool aloofness, and fashion as his weapons and armors. Blaine has his Swiss Army knife, boxing, and cheery disposition.
"Oh, Blaine," Kurt whispers when Blaine finishes talking, leaning forward to rest his forehead against Blaine's.
Blaine closes his eyes and tries not to feel like his insides are spilling out, vulnerable.
*
The night before Blaine's first day at McKinley, his father comes into his room and hands him a box, so similar to the one he received when he was eight. Blaine opens the box without a word and pulls out the Swiss Army knife, surprised at its weight and how thick it is.
"This is a lot nicer than the one I bought you ten years ago."
Blaine almost asks him if his father noticed that he doesn't even have that one anymore, that he owns one that would make the his father frown, but he just admires this, wondering how many tools it has.
"This model has eighteen tools - there's an LED light, too. So you should read the manual. I thought it would be good for you to have."
And suddenly Blaine's throat closes and he can't breathe, wondering if his father means what he think he means, if this is really a case of like father like son.
His father squeezes his shoulder briefly before leaving Blaine's room without a word.
*
Thankfully, Blaine doesn't feel the urge to stick his hand into his bag for that Swiss Army knife, although he runs his thumb over the one Cooper got him because he still has it in his pockets everyday (it's softened to be something that makes him happy, like when he was eight).
*
Blaine tells Kurt about the second Swiss Army knife he received from his father when he's still high on pain medication and Kurt is horrified.
Blaine will have to explain it better when he can see properly through his eye, that it's not about potentially 'protecting himself' and using one of the knives on some homophobic, dangerous person. But it's hard because he knows that Kurt won't be able to fully understand it, the kind of relationship Blaine and his father share because it's not nearly as open and honest as Kurt and Burt's.
*
When Cooper comes to visit, Blaine wonders what the hell happened to him.
Sure, he's always been self-centered and absolutely ridiculous, but at least he was capable of having lucid moments. It's not like he made them up, as he repeats to himself as he tightly grips the Swiss Army knife Cooper gave him in his pocket.
(…and it's an ache I still remember…)
*
The day after Cooper told Blaine he was coming to visit, Blaine ordered Cooper a Swiss Army knife. Maybe it was stupid since Cooper still had his first one, but he thought it would be a nice gesture.
He really needs to stop the urge to constantly throw these things away - they're not cheap.
*
But the day before Cooper leaves and they've made up, Blaine gives him the gift as they're sitting on Blaine's bed.
"Luck of the Irish," Cooper exclaims with his Irish accent - it's actually his best one. Blaine likes to think it's because it's a bit of their heritage shining through, even though Blaine's pretty sure it's because Cooper has seen My Left Foot too many times ("Daniel Day Lewis is an inspiration to us all." (at least Cooper has some legitimate idols otherwise Blaine could never take him seriously)).
"What's this for - I haven't exactly deserved it," Cooper asks, spinning the green Swiss Army knife in the space between them.
"Maybe not, but…you're pretty much the only family who's always had my back, despite…everything. So. I just wanted to let you know it goes both ways."
Cooper smiles and even gets a little teary-eyed for a few second before pouncing on Blaine with a hug.
"Agh, Cooper!"
"We need to hug it out some more, shhh."
*
Cooper leaves his old Swiss Army knife in his bedroom before he leaves and when Blaine catches him, Cooper just says, "I don't need it anymore."
And there's probably something symbolic about it - Blaine tossing out his years ago, Cooper leaving his in his childhood bedroom five minutes ago - but Blaine just wants to move forward, to stop being burdened by the negative effects of growing up as an Anderson. Of course that's impossible to do, but this - their moving forward into a more equal, open relationship - is a step in the right direction.
Characters/Pairings: Blaine, Cooper; Blaine/Kurt
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers/Warnings: through 3x15; language, mention of violence
Word Count: ~2,300
Summary: The Swiss Army knife is an Anderson tradition that reeks of masculine stereotyping and impersonal, familial obligation.
A/N: Thank you xsaturated for helping me out with the direction of this fic because I was a mess about it.
The Swiss Army Relations
The night before Blaine is about to head off to his first camping trip with his Boy Scout troop, his father hands him a small box. He didn't bother to wrap it, the box black with a silver crest with a plus sign in it.
"It's a Swiss Army knife," his father explains once Blaine pulls it out, confused by the red…thing. How is it a knife? "My father gave me one when I first joined the Boy Scouts."
He then spends the next half hour showing him how to pull out all the tools - there are only seven since it's the classic model, but father trusts him with it.
Frankly, Blaine is terrified of it. He's scared of accidentally stabbing himself with the knife or cutting his fingers off, so he doesn't use it, but he always carries it with him on camping trips. It makes him feel older and simultaneously protected, that maybe some of his father's strength will seep from the plastic and metal of the knife into his skin and become part of him. It makes him feel loved.
*
"Oh yeah, Dad gave me one too when I was your age, whatever. Hm, I wonder where mine is - might've lost it at a party. So - wanna hear the cool stuff I'm doing in LA?"
Blaine grips the house phone tightly, tears filling his eyes and he can't bring himself to answer Cooper because for a stupid second, he had hoped his father was giving him something special, something to Blaine that he didn't give to Cooper for whatever reason.
"Well, I can't tell you everything since you're not old enough, Blainey, but -"
Blaine slowly turns the Swiss army knife in his hands as he listens to Cooper talk about what a star he is, how special he is in the big city and Blaine can't feel any smaller than he does now (but that always tends to happen when he speaks with him).
*
Blaine is thirteen, almost fourteen when he quits Boy Scouts, unable to handle the way most of his troop is treating him. He just tells his parents he wants to focus on his academics once he starts high school.
The Swiss Army knife is placed in his nightstand drawer, hardly touched after that.
At least until a few weeks into freshman year, when the bullying gets worse and he starts carrying it with him. Just in case. He feels silly for doing so, especially since most of the time he forgets it's in his backpack, but sometimes when he's on the receiving glare that can't be describe as anything other than murderous, he feels better just knowing he has it.
*
Sometimes he wondered if it all would've turned out differently if he didn't trust his peers as much as he did that night, leaving his knife at home because who's going to pay attention to him and his friend - shouldn't they be busy dancing and having fun?
(How was he supposed to know that some of their definition of 'fun' involved beating two freshmen in the parking lot, trying to see if they could mix blood, cement, and snow like paints on a canvas?)
*
As soon as he's released from the hospital and brought home, he goes into his nightstand drawer, takes the Swiss Army knife that's been mocking him for the two weeks he's been in the hospital, and throws it away. He can't bring himself to feel sorry for throwing away one of the few personal gifts his father ever gave him when he can barely look Blaine in the eye now.
*
He transfers to Dalton and he forgets about previously owning a pocket knife until Cooper comes to visit for Christmas, his gift being a Swiss Army knife, but instead of the classic red one his father gave him, he's given a plaid-printed one with blues and pinks and greens.
"I know you threw yours out after what happened and every Anderson should have a Swiss Army knife - it's tradition. But I think this fits you more," Cooper says as Blaine continues to stare blankly at the gift.
He doesn't know whether to be touched, upset, or angry.
"It's supposed to be a father-son thing," Blaine finally says in a quiet voice, picking the knife out of the box to turn it over between his fingers.
"Well, you know me, I like to fuck tradition now and again, but I rather like this one in our family," Cooper answers with a wink and a grin, even though there's something sober in his eyes that makes Blaine take him seriously.
"Didn't you lose yours? That's what you said when I first told you."
Cooper smiles, shaking his head. "I thought I did - I found it in my room when you were in the hospital, actually." He reaches into the pocket of his leather jacket and pulls out a red Swiss Army knife that's scratched and old. Blaine wonders if he uses it now - if he only uses one of the tools or just carries it around for sentimentality.
Blaine doesn't ask.
"So, are you going to keep it or throw it out?"
Blaine looks down at the knife, a nasty part of him wanting to tell Cooper to take it back, claiming that this isn't thoughtful or personal at all - the Swiss Army knife is an Anderson tradition that reeks of masculine stereotyping and impersonal, familial obligation.
But. The knife in his hands has every color in the rainbow for the most part and oh, maybe Cooper is sharper than Blaine gives him credit for.
(They both have that in common.)
Blaine curls the Swiss Army knife into his palm and smiles at Cooper. "I'll keep it. Thank you."
Cooper beams. "Jolly good!"
Blaine rolls his eyes, but the smile stays in place.
*
He doesn't catch any crap at Dalton for having a Swiss Army knife with its plaid print. And honestly, it's lost a lot of its original meaning to him. Now it's just a thing he carries around because he's a former Boy Scout and "always be prepared" is something that's synonymous with him.
It feels like such a lie sometimes.
*
At one point, Blaine does research about Swiss Army knives - how they came to be (first produced in 1891 for the Swiss military; coined by U.S. soldiers after World War II) and the type of men that owned them.
(Apparently military service is mandatory in Switzerland once a boy turns eighteen. Receiving a Swiss Army knife from the military becomes sort of a symbol of coming of age and it disturbs him how his father essentially wanted his kids to grow up that fast and so help him, that early father-son tradition is dying with him.)
*
He tells Kurt about the Swiss Army Anderson tradition when he uses the knife's small pair of scissors to help Kurt cut a loose thread from knitted sweater, a few weeks after they start dating. He mentions his first knife and how he threw it out - he gives no explanation and Kurt doesn't prod - and how his brother gave him this one.
It's scary, revealing a tradition that's so personal to his family to someone else, and maybe in the future he'll tell him that it became something to clutch in his pocket during those really bad days in public school, the fact that he threw it away was because the one time he didn't act like a Boy Scout, he got a broken left wrist ("If you're right-handed, why do you wear your watch on your right hand?"), a concussion that left him incapable of doing anything for so long ("Wait, if we're the same age, how are you in the grade below me?"), and other injuries that left scars on his body and mind.
(He still wakes up from nightmares now and again and he thought 'mind over matter' was a legitimate concept.)
But for now, he just holds Kurt and he wonders how much Kurt can hear his heart pounding in his chest, if he can feel it at all.
*
As soon as he hikes up his trousers the night of prom, he pockets the Swiss Army knife. And a pack of tissues.
Always be prepared.
*
He almost tells Kurt about what else he's been carrying in his pockets after they leave prom and arrive at Kurt's house, but Kurt is hugging Blaine so tightly, shoulders shaking as he apologizes and cries all over again and Blaine can't do that to him; Kurt doesn't need to feel pain from Blaine's end too.
*
He finally gets his chance at one of Brittany's pool parties. Kurt was searching through Blaine's shorts for a pack of tissues he normally carries when he finds the Swiss Army knife instead.
"Blaine…can you come here for a second?"
Blaine climbs out of the pool, his stomach squirming when he catches Kurt looking at him, temporarily distracted.
Kurt pulls Blaine inside and asks why he's carrying his Swiss Army knife to a pool party and Kurt just knows that it's something more than just a force of habit when he carries a pill case with prescription pain killers in his pocket just in case and is wearing a tank top in a pool, despite the fact that the wet fabric is clinging to Blaine's abs, revealing little to no fat.
So Blaine's honest - it's not just a handy tool for him and it's more than a gift from his brother (whom he still refuses to really talk about).
Kurt has his quick wit, cool aloofness, and fashion as his weapons and armors. Blaine has his Swiss Army knife, boxing, and cheery disposition.
"Oh, Blaine," Kurt whispers when Blaine finishes talking, leaning forward to rest his forehead against Blaine's.
Blaine closes his eyes and tries not to feel like his insides are spilling out, vulnerable.
*
The night before Blaine's first day at McKinley, his father comes into his room and hands him a box, so similar to the one he received when he was eight. Blaine opens the box without a word and pulls out the Swiss Army knife, surprised at its weight and how thick it is.
"This is a lot nicer than the one I bought you ten years ago."
Blaine almost asks him if his father noticed that he doesn't even have that one anymore, that he owns one that would make the his father frown, but he just admires this, wondering how many tools it has.
"This model has eighteen tools - there's an LED light, too. So you should read the manual. I thought it would be good for you to have."
And suddenly Blaine's throat closes and he can't breathe, wondering if his father means what he think he means, if this is really a case of like father like son.
His father squeezes his shoulder briefly before leaving Blaine's room without a word.
*
Thankfully, Blaine doesn't feel the urge to stick his hand into his bag for that Swiss Army knife, although he runs his thumb over the one Cooper got him because he still has it in his pockets everyday (it's softened to be something that makes him happy, like when he was eight).
*
Blaine tells Kurt about the second Swiss Army knife he received from his father when he's still high on pain medication and Kurt is horrified.
Blaine will have to explain it better when he can see properly through his eye, that it's not about potentially 'protecting himself' and using one of the knives on some homophobic, dangerous person. But it's hard because he knows that Kurt won't be able to fully understand it, the kind of relationship Blaine and his father share because it's not nearly as open and honest as Kurt and Burt's.
*
When Cooper comes to visit, Blaine wonders what the hell happened to him.
Sure, he's always been self-centered and absolutely ridiculous, but at least he was capable of having lucid moments. It's not like he made them up, as he repeats to himself as he tightly grips the Swiss Army knife Cooper gave him in his pocket.
(…and it's an ache I still remember…)
*
The day after Cooper told Blaine he was coming to visit, Blaine ordered Cooper a Swiss Army knife. Maybe it was stupid since Cooper still had his first one, but he thought it would be a nice gesture.
He really needs to stop the urge to constantly throw these things away - they're not cheap.
*
But the day before Cooper leaves and they've made up, Blaine gives him the gift as they're sitting on Blaine's bed.
"Luck of the Irish," Cooper exclaims with his Irish accent - it's actually his best one. Blaine likes to think it's because it's a bit of their heritage shining through, even though Blaine's pretty sure it's because Cooper has seen My Left Foot too many times ("Daniel Day Lewis is an inspiration to us all." (at least Cooper has some legitimate idols otherwise Blaine could never take him seriously)).
"What's this for - I haven't exactly deserved it," Cooper asks, spinning the green Swiss Army knife in the space between them.
"Maybe not, but…you're pretty much the only family who's always had my back, despite…everything. So. I just wanted to let you know it goes both ways."
Cooper smiles and even gets a little teary-eyed for a few second before pouncing on Blaine with a hug.
"Agh, Cooper!"
"We need to hug it out some more, shhh."
*
Cooper leaves his old Swiss Army knife in his bedroom before he leaves and when Blaine catches him, Cooper just says, "I don't need it anymore."
And there's probably something symbolic about it - Blaine tossing out his years ago, Cooper leaving his in his childhood bedroom five minutes ago - but Blaine just wants to move forward, to stop being burdened by the negative effects of growing up as an Anderson. Of course that's impossible to do, but this - their moving forward into a more equal, open relationship - is a step in the right direction.