(no subject)
last night Roger and Mike and I went to the Oriole's game with the library. It was great.. just like everything lately. I can't believe that something good is finally happening to me. I live in an apartment in downtown Baltimore and my window looks out onto the skyline. I have my best friend here with me and a good chance that I'll be working in a stable, government job soon.
not to mention Mike.
where did such a nice guy come from? I still have to pinch him to make sure he's real.. within the past few weeks we've been walking downtown by the harbor drinking frappuccino, played games online, gone to see a documentary, made out in the moonlight, looked at the stars, walked along the boardwalk at Havre de Grace beside the water, eaten out at chili's with some of his friends, played putt putt, he drove me home from work, gone out to a national park and spent all day there walking around and eating sandwiches and cheesecake he packed for us... and then last night we got to watch the game together with Roger. He has bought me a dozen pink roses, taken me to eat lasagna, and paid for my ice cream and not to mention a dozen other sweet things..
so this morning I was thinking about all this and I just started crying
oh God, thank you. I'm tired of being treated like shit and being lonely.
Even if, for some incomprehensible reason, this doesn't work out.. at least I have been happy for almost a month and that will be enough to get me through another decade of suicidal depression.
not to mention Mike.
where did such a nice guy come from? I still have to pinch him to make sure he's real.. within the past few weeks we've been walking downtown by the harbor drinking frappuccino, played games online, gone to see a documentary, made out in the moonlight, looked at the stars, walked along the boardwalk at Havre de Grace beside the water, eaten out at chili's with some of his friends, played putt putt, he drove me home from work, gone out to a national park and spent all day there walking around and eating sandwiches and cheesecake he packed for us... and then last night we got to watch the game together with Roger. He has bought me a dozen pink roses, taken me to eat lasagna, and paid for my ice cream and not to mention a dozen other sweet things..
so this morning I was thinking about all this and I just started crying
oh God, thank you. I'm tired of being treated like shit and being lonely.
Even if, for some incomprehensible reason, this doesn't work out.. at least I have been happy for almost a month and that will be enough to get me through another decade of suicidal depression.