something a little deep.

[missdorkette68]

somebody help me. i'm so ridiculously stressed out i can't cope anymore. i try so hard all the time to make everyone happy and to try and be the perfect friend, daughter, student, sister, lover, writer, employee, person. the things i used to be good at i'm not even sure of anymore. i don't even want the same things out of life anymore. maybe i'm finally starting to grow up, i don't know. controversial activities i used to regularly partake in are seeming less and less intriguing. i'm losing best friends to their boyfriends, making me feel lonely. i don't need a boy to be happy. i know this. and i've made more fuckups with boys than i can count. i'm just finally ready to have a relationship and give it my all, and it's aggravating when you want something or someone so badly and it just doesn't work out. i'm sick of the things people say about me. people who don't know me. i know i shouldnt care what they say, and for while I didn't. i am just sick of hearing the same things said about me over and over when i'm just not the same person I was a year ago, or even a few months ago.

I am so thankful for the amazing friends that I do have. While my trustworthy friends are few and scarce, the true friends are better than I could ever ask for.

i sound so utterly emo i'm making myself more depressed.