I don't even know where to begin........
Man. My trip to Nigeria was really rough this time around. This was my fifth time going and it was DEFINITELY one of the worst visits I'll ever have. We went back for the main purpose of my parent's 25th wedding anniversary, and also to "open" our new house there. Unfortunately, the house wasn't finished when we got there.
My parents were really pissed about the fact that our house was incomplete, when it should have been finished before we (my siblings and I) arrived. That caused a chain reaction that threw everything out of wack. We didn't move into the house until Christmas Eve and we spent all of that day and Christmas day sweeping up concrete dust and wood shavings. We mopped, swept and assembled all the furniture that my parents had sent over.
The house itself was nice, but the fact that it was unfinished made it hard to deal with. We never fully unpacked anything because we knew that once we left, the workmen would be coming back to work on the house.
Every single day, people were tense and on edge because of the house AND the party preparations. The day-to-day atmosphere was unpleasant. My siblings and I mostly slept and ate. We visited friends/family just about everyday. For the whole 18 days that my siblings and I were there, we had only TWO days where we just sat back and acted like we were on an actual vacation.
I shouldn't make our trip sound like we were utterly miserable all the time, but believe me, I am in NO hurry to go back.
This time around, we didn't spend as much time with my mom's side of the family. I love just about everyone on my mom's side. But because of the house, we spend most of our time with our dad's side. Before we built this house, we could never have "stayed" at my dad's place because none of my dad's people had a decent home that we could stay in. There was no electricity, no running water and essentially nowhere we could LIVE comfortably. That's definitely NOT the case on my mom's side. The first few times I went to Nigeria, we stayed with my mom's sister because she has a real house. And my grandpa's house is HUGE, not to mention that my uncle, the eze (king) fixed up the third floor to be his personal space, so being the rich business man that he is, it's *really* nice up there.
But now that we have a house in my dad's village, we can't justify going to stay at our maternal home so much, so we HAD to stay at my dad's. The worst part of the trip was easily my dad's family. As per Nigerian custom, the "family house" is always built in your paternal home. Let's just say that I HATE having to call my dad's kin my "family". Since my grandpa died, I have exactly ONE relative on my dad's side who seems to be worth anything--my first cousin who's doing his doctoral residency I believe. He's 27, still in school, incredibly smart. It really is amazing how he and my father were able to come out of that place not having their heads up their asses.
Usually, I always say the best part of visiting Nigeria is going to see my family, but I should amend that statement. The best part of going to Nigeria is getting to see my MOM'S family, and that one cousin on my dad's side.
Bah. I'm still jetlagged, so I woke up at 7 am, even though I forced myself to go to sleep at 2 am, so sorry if this post was slightly incoherent. I'll post some pics later.
My parents were really pissed about the fact that our house was incomplete, when it should have been finished before we (my siblings and I) arrived. That caused a chain reaction that threw everything out of wack. We didn't move into the house until Christmas Eve and we spent all of that day and Christmas day sweeping up concrete dust and wood shavings. We mopped, swept and assembled all the furniture that my parents had sent over.
The house itself was nice, but the fact that it was unfinished made it hard to deal with. We never fully unpacked anything because we knew that once we left, the workmen would be coming back to work on the house.
Every single day, people were tense and on edge because of the house AND the party preparations. The day-to-day atmosphere was unpleasant. My siblings and I mostly slept and ate. We visited friends/family just about everyday. For the whole 18 days that my siblings and I were there, we had only TWO days where we just sat back and acted like we were on an actual vacation.
I shouldn't make our trip sound like we were utterly miserable all the time, but believe me, I am in NO hurry to go back.
This time around, we didn't spend as much time with my mom's side of the family. I love just about everyone on my mom's side. But because of the house, we spend most of our time with our dad's side. Before we built this house, we could never have "stayed" at my dad's place because none of my dad's people had a decent home that we could stay in. There was no electricity, no running water and essentially nowhere we could LIVE comfortably. That's definitely NOT the case on my mom's side. The first few times I went to Nigeria, we stayed with my mom's sister because she has a real house. And my grandpa's house is HUGE, not to mention that my uncle, the eze (king) fixed up the third floor to be his personal space, so being the rich business man that he is, it's *really* nice up there.
But now that we have a house in my dad's village, we can't justify going to stay at our maternal home so much, so we HAD to stay at my dad's. The worst part of the trip was easily my dad's family. As per Nigerian custom, the "family house" is always built in your paternal home. Let's just say that I HATE having to call my dad's kin my "family". Since my grandpa died, I have exactly ONE relative on my dad's side who seems to be worth anything--my first cousin who's doing his doctoral residency I believe. He's 27, still in school, incredibly smart. It really is amazing how he and my father were able to come out of that place not having their heads up their asses.
Usually, I always say the best part of visiting Nigeria is going to see my family, but I should amend that statement. The best part of going to Nigeria is getting to see my MOM'S family, and that one cousin on my dad's side.
Bah. I'm still jetlagged, so I woke up at 7 am, even though I forced myself to go to sleep at 2 am, so sorry if this post was slightly incoherent. I'll post some pics later.