it's been a while...
Wow, it's been a while since i've updated this thing. I doubt that anyone really reads this thing...oh well.
I got married! and i got a new job! those are two exciting things.
I feel like i can't stop thinking that something is going to go wrong. I dont know why, but i can't get the thought out of my head. It's kind of like when you notice a spider on the wall and then you can't stop seeing it.
The thing is nothing bad has happened. You would think if i was worrying about things, it would be because i have reason to worry like a cheating issue or mistreatment. But i really dont... My husband is wonderful to me. He loves me, I love him. He treats me how I should be treated, even better! He's sweet, caring, and understanding. Yet, I can't help thinking that something will happen to throw off everything i know.
Not that he would cheat on me or hurt me. I guess i'm just afraid of falling out of love. it's one of those big "what if" questions.
Getting married is a big step. Changing my name. all that stuff that goes with it. It's scary. I used to have anxiety attacks before the wedding, just because of the fact that there's no backup plan when it comes to marriage. you put all of your chips in, not really knowing what all of the cards are.
I'm so afraid that we will end up miserable (like my parents).
I wish other people felt this way. I feel like if someone else were to say that they were feeling the same way at some point, i'd feel better about everything.
how can i stop feeling like this? I need to just get these thoughts out of my head. I had these same types of feelings two weeks before the wedding. I thought they were jitters. (which they were), but i didn't have jitters until about 2 weeks before the wedding. then i had some jitters until after the wedding (honeymoon etc). It's not like im thinking "holy cow, i got married, what was i thinking??" it's nothing like that! I'm happy to be married. I love my husband. I know he loves me. But i feel like im afraid that something bad might happen. It's like, I can't let myself just be happy and not worry so much about the future.
any advice would be greatly appreciated...
I got married! and i got a new job! those are two exciting things.
I feel like i can't stop thinking that something is going to go wrong. I dont know why, but i can't get the thought out of my head. It's kind of like when you notice a spider on the wall and then you can't stop seeing it.
The thing is nothing bad has happened. You would think if i was worrying about things, it would be because i have reason to worry like a cheating issue or mistreatment. But i really dont... My husband is wonderful to me. He loves me, I love him. He treats me how I should be treated, even better! He's sweet, caring, and understanding. Yet, I can't help thinking that something will happen to throw off everything i know.
Not that he would cheat on me or hurt me. I guess i'm just afraid of falling out of love. it's one of those big "what if" questions.
Getting married is a big step. Changing my name. all that stuff that goes with it. It's scary. I used to have anxiety attacks before the wedding, just because of the fact that there's no backup plan when it comes to marriage. you put all of your chips in, not really knowing what all of the cards are.
I'm so afraid that we will end up miserable (like my parents).
I wish other people felt this way. I feel like if someone else were to say that they were feeling the same way at some point, i'd feel better about everything.
how can i stop feeling like this? I need to just get these thoughts out of my head. I had these same types of feelings two weeks before the wedding. I thought they were jitters. (which they were), but i didn't have jitters until about 2 weeks before the wedding. then i had some jitters until after the wedding (honeymoon etc). It's not like im thinking "holy cow, i got married, what was i thinking??" it's nothing like that! I'm happy to be married. I love my husband. I know he loves me. But i feel like im afraid that something bad might happen. It's like, I can't let myself just be happy and not worry so much about the future.
any advice would be greatly appreciated...