Once you go glam-amazon, you never go back...-azon.
Hey guys. So where have some of you kids disappeared to?! Yes, I am actually starting this entry guilty on two counts of whining - one, last entry I totally delivered and got like two comments. Where my Idol fans be? I Carl-spammed! (That said, I get that nobody probably cares about Carl anymore what with the slow decline of Australian Idol and all, so you know. Forgiven). Secondly, SO EFFING HOT. I'll negate this whine too by saying that while Tuesday was 37C and yesterday was something in the vicinity of 39C, today is set to be a lot cooler. Two days of heat is really nothing compared to weeks of it. It's also nothing compared to the current flood situation in Fiji. For those of you who don't know Ness/thelockerboy was actually in Fiji for a week and had to spend four days sleeping on the floor of the hotel and airport waiting for a flight out, which caused me to hit my panic button for a bit there. The floods have apparently washed away entire villages and schools, so says the news, and a lot of people died. I seem like a bitch now for complaining about the two days of heat now, don't I? Anyway I'm just glad most of our tourists are out of there. Ness called it a "total nightmare", and coming from her, that's saying something. Dude.
Hey! You know what's way more cheerful than this? LINKAGE! And I actually have interesting stuff to go on about today!
- Michael C. Hall, who plays Dexter, got married to his on-screen sister recently. Some people think this will make Dexter a little weird to watch. I say romantic vibes between Dexter and Deb are probably the least of Dex's problems. Sheesh.
- Cobie Smulders in Women's Health. I've said before that I don't quite buy Cobie as an actress outside of sitcoms, but girl sure can cut the model mustard. (Whoa, mixed metaphor!)
- Prison Break is effectively canceled. No more Dominic Purcell for me :(
- The part you're really interested in: Golden Globes outfit drama! I'll keep this quick so y'all can get around to killing me for linking Just Jared, LOL. To be fair, they did have a lot of pics of those random people who were presenting without actually being nominated.
THE NOT UGLY:
Evan Rachel Wood (presenting)
Like her or hate her, she looked amazing. Loving her as I do I can say that I am SO relieved that she's left Marilyn Manson behind. I didn't actually believe it until I saw this picture, but she really is coming back out of herself. With Manson she had this sort of glamorous heavy metal goth thing going on and she's kind of channeled that into elegant vintage goth now. Still dark, still a little heavy-handed, but it's not blood red everything and make-up drawn on with a Sharpie. I love the big-ass emerald cocktail ring, and the simple hair.
Jenna Fischer (The Office)
Alright, so, here's the deal with this one. Jenna blogged before the GGs telling us that she was going to wear the same designer who came up with her 2007 bow claptrap, so you know, I was wary. But despite her making it onto a few worst dressed lists for the night, I actually thought this really pretty. The print is very antique fair, but it works on her. It fit, too, which is more than you can say for some others on the night. It seems like the kind of dress you wouldn't be afraid of tripping over or sitting down in. So I loved it.
That being said: I felt like her make up was not the world's most flattering. I mainly have an issue with the eyeliner making her eyes look minute which is why I hate the idea that eyeliner works on everyone. Her foundation too, kind of fell into her mid-30's lines a bit. Loved the hair though!
Anne Hathaway
That dress is gorge. Really, that's pretty much all I have to say, but since I'm here I'll keep talking. The details on the body are so petty and shiny, and it really sets off her paleness which is one of the things I love about her. It fits her well, nice minimal accessories, good make up, what else is there to go on about. This almost makes up for the fact she did Bride wars. Except nothing can make up for that, really. Moving on!
Blake Lively (Gossip Girl)
Now this, I have things to say about. Here's what I think happened here: though Gossip Girl was not Blake's breakout role in some senses of the word (that honour really goes to the first Sisterhood movie), it was the project that made her not only well-known but somewhat of a fashion favorite. Considering that, I doubt she picked this herself. For an event this big I'm sure the GG kids who were there had stylists on hand and that's why this is a little on the ill-fitting side. You can see it goes flat where her stomach sticks out a slight and wrinkles everywhere else. That said, the thing I love about this is that it shows she actually has a stomach. She's not super skinny and you can see she eats sandwiches. And she is so photogenic, because in every shot she's glowing. And I love that she's wearing glitter eyeshadow. Dey be keepin' her yung.
All in all I think this dress/look is frigging gorgeous. In fact have only one issue with it: the shoes. I don't know what they were going for with that, or whether there was some sort of predicament wherein Blake didn't know what the hell she was going to be wearing and so went with the most neutral shoe she had, but it just doesn't work. I would have gone with either black, or maybe a royal blue. You know?
THE NOT AS UGLY (.e.g it's nice but it's got issues)
Vanessa Hudgens
Oh, bb V. I was so close to calling Not Ugly on this, because it is most definitely pretty. It's a nice sashaying length, I like the sparkly mermaid thing she's got going on, and the necklaces are EXQUIRRRSITE. They really do make this look fun, those necklaces, reminding us all that she's not one of them mid-40 movie stars but rather a young adult still deranged by Disney. The clutch is unique and lovely, too. What drags this down is the colour. If this dress had been a little more into the baby pink side of things or a little more into yellow gold territory I would have dug it way more. But as it is now - not pink, not yellow, rather a kind of bland sand beige - it blends into her skin a bit too much. I think her shoes match it too, which is a bit of overkill.
In other details of this, girl's got new hair! Did ya notice? Fun fact, I used to be really jealous of bb V's hair until I had an ANTM-inspired epiphany wherein I realized it's not her real hair. I'm certain of it with this new hair that almost screams weave. It's just too voluminous and thick and wig-like to be real.
Rumer Willis
Yeah, you're wondering why the hell she was at the Ggs, aren't you? Apparently she was Miss Golden Globe. You know, that random hot chick who stands at the side of the stage and gives the award to the presenter and is responsible for shoving the winner offstage to the press room. That was her this year. My problem with Rumer Willis is mainly the fact that I'm mean and think she has the most unfortunate face ever. She comes from two such attractive people but unfortunately this is what you get when you take Demi's chin and Bruce's head. Her face is alienesque in a bad way, not an edgy Gemma Ward way, a bad way. I am awful. Anyway, my issue here? I love the colour, but you see how it's kind of slipped down at an angle because her hand is on her hip? I bet she kept having to pull it up all night to avoid flashing the crowd. Which brings me back to: Ill. Fitting. I have no idea how celebrities, with their relatively disposable incomes making them able to hire tailors, are unable to find dresses that fit. Good lord.
Hayden Panetierre
I'm sending you straight to a make-up shot with this one because I thought it was seriously flawless. Hayden must have one of the best make up artists in the industry working on her or something because her make up is generally perfect right down to the fake lashes. Gah. Anyway, that aside, the dress is why this is in Not As Ugly territory. I think she's got that thing wherein she's dating Milo, who is a good nine years older than her, thus she feels the pressure to dress older than she is. I'm thinking back to last year's Emmys, I think it was, where she wore that fun poofy pregnancy dress, and compared to now she looks like she's aged five years. When in reality, she's younger than me and girl only has a few more poofy dress wearing years left. Milo wasn't even there!
Sidebar: look at that shot of her looking over her shoulder. Is that a tattoo? Is that even legal in the States?! Cause she's not 21!
THE UGLY
Maggie Gyllenhaal
Okay. Wow. Okay. I have really, really tried to understand this dress. Every outlet including my local paper has put this on their best dressed list for the GGs, so I've gone back and looked at this dress from every angle available and my verdict is still the same. That print. Is. AWFUL. Yes, okay, it fit. This is a good thing. The detailing and the flattering cut are even better things. But they're all negated by that print. It's like a neon blue leopard died on her. It's like a neon blue butterfly landed on her shoulder and died or something. Some animal died, that's for sure. (Not really, but you get me). Just don't wear this again, Mags, please. Even if you were able to, don't. My entire reaction to this dress can be summed up in one word: WAT.
Also, I kinda thought the make up was a bit heavy handed, but that may just be the lights. Or me.
Renee Zellweger
Okay, see. Now they're just messing with us. I feel like this dress had to be some sort of joke. Surely, you think, she couldn't have gotten into this without someone - her manager, her publicist, her limo driver - pointing out how bad it was. Unfortunately for all of us, you'd be wrong. I felt like this would have been fine if the black had continued up to her chest to end in, say, a nice sweetheart line. You know, simple, a bit clingy but nice. Instead, it becomes this weird ripped-sleeve sheer choking thing and to make it worse she sticks a nude corset thing underneath. I'd actually far more like to see whoever is standing behind her in the light pink gown because it looks very pretty compared to Renee. But then again, I seriously think Maggie's dead neon leopard looks better than this. It's just that bad. Did we accidentally teleport to 1995?
THE LULZ
The Jo Bros
Who knows why the Jonas Brothers were even at the GGs. I don't try and explain these things. What makes this incredibly LOltastic is these boys were obviously not dressed by the same stylist. What makes it CAPSLOCK-ALARIOUS is that the Jonas Brothers are in fact demonstrating the three different kinds of dress codes you may find on any given invitation - smart casual (velvet blazer over a nice shirt!), semi-formal (wear a tie over that bright shirt!), and formal (rock that bow tie!).
Seriously though they don't even look like they belong together. So this one just had to get Char's LULZ Award for Stylist Fail.
There are some pictures of other famous types in sinful_caesar's post here, and some of the Mad Men, True Blood and HBO/NBC after-parties here. And Now I'm going to go faint from tiredness. Good night!
Hey! You know what's way more cheerful than this? LINKAGE! And I actually have interesting stuff to go on about today!
- Michael C. Hall, who plays Dexter, got married to his on-screen sister recently. Some people think this will make Dexter a little weird to watch. I say romantic vibes between Dexter and Deb are probably the least of Dex's problems. Sheesh.
- Cobie Smulders in Women's Health. I've said before that I don't quite buy Cobie as an actress outside of sitcoms, but girl sure can cut the model mustard. (Whoa, mixed metaphor!)
- Prison Break is effectively canceled. No more Dominic Purcell for me :(
- The part you're really interested in: Golden Globes outfit drama! I'll keep this quick so y'all can get around to killing me for linking Just Jared, LOL. To be fair, they did have a lot of pics of those random people who were presenting without actually being nominated.
THE NOT UGLY:
Evan Rachel Wood (presenting)
Like her or hate her, she looked amazing. Loving her as I do I can say that I am SO relieved that she's left Marilyn Manson behind. I didn't actually believe it until I saw this picture, but she really is coming back out of herself. With Manson she had this sort of glamorous heavy metal goth thing going on and she's kind of channeled that into elegant vintage goth now. Still dark, still a little heavy-handed, but it's not blood red everything and make-up drawn on with a Sharpie. I love the big-ass emerald cocktail ring, and the simple hair.
Jenna Fischer (The Office)
Alright, so, here's the deal with this one. Jenna blogged before the GGs telling us that she was going to wear the same designer who came up with her 2007 bow claptrap, so you know, I was wary. But despite her making it onto a few worst dressed lists for the night, I actually thought this really pretty. The print is very antique fair, but it works on her. It fit, too, which is more than you can say for some others on the night. It seems like the kind of dress you wouldn't be afraid of tripping over or sitting down in. So I loved it.
That being said: I felt like her make up was not the world's most flattering. I mainly have an issue with the eyeliner making her eyes look minute which is why I hate the idea that eyeliner works on everyone. Her foundation too, kind of fell into her mid-30's lines a bit. Loved the hair though!
Anne Hathaway
That dress is gorge. Really, that's pretty much all I have to say, but since I'm here I'll keep talking. The details on the body are so petty and shiny, and it really sets off her paleness which is one of the things I love about her. It fits her well, nice minimal accessories, good make up, what else is there to go on about. This almost makes up for the fact she did Bride wars. Except nothing can make up for that, really. Moving on!
Blake Lively (Gossip Girl)
Now this, I have things to say about. Here's what I think happened here: though Gossip Girl was not Blake's breakout role in some senses of the word (that honour really goes to the first Sisterhood movie), it was the project that made her not only well-known but somewhat of a fashion favorite. Considering that, I doubt she picked this herself. For an event this big I'm sure the GG kids who were there had stylists on hand and that's why this is a little on the ill-fitting side. You can see it goes flat where her stomach sticks out a slight and wrinkles everywhere else. That said, the thing I love about this is that it shows she actually has a stomach. She's not super skinny and you can see she eats sandwiches. And she is so photogenic, because in every shot she's glowing. And I love that she's wearing glitter eyeshadow. Dey be keepin' her yung.
All in all I think this dress/look is frigging gorgeous. In fact have only one issue with it: the shoes. I don't know what they were going for with that, or whether there was some sort of predicament wherein Blake didn't know what the hell she was going to be wearing and so went with the most neutral shoe she had, but it just doesn't work. I would have gone with either black, or maybe a royal blue. You know?
THE NOT AS UGLY (.e.g it's nice but it's got issues)
Vanessa Hudgens
Oh, bb V. I was so close to calling Not Ugly on this, because it is most definitely pretty. It's a nice sashaying length, I like the sparkly mermaid thing she's got going on, and the necklaces are EXQUIRRRSITE. They really do make this look fun, those necklaces, reminding us all that she's not one of them mid-40 movie stars but rather a young adult still deranged by Disney. The clutch is unique and lovely, too. What drags this down is the colour. If this dress had been a little more into the baby pink side of things or a little more into yellow gold territory I would have dug it way more. But as it is now - not pink, not yellow, rather a kind of bland sand beige - it blends into her skin a bit too much. I think her shoes match it too, which is a bit of overkill.
In other details of this, girl's got new hair! Did ya notice? Fun fact, I used to be really jealous of bb V's hair until I had an ANTM-inspired epiphany wherein I realized it's not her real hair. I'm certain of it with this new hair that almost screams weave. It's just too voluminous and thick and wig-like to be real.
Rumer Willis
Yeah, you're wondering why the hell she was at the Ggs, aren't you? Apparently she was Miss Golden Globe. You know, that random hot chick who stands at the side of the stage and gives the award to the presenter and is responsible for shoving the winner offstage to the press room. That was her this year. My problem with Rumer Willis is mainly the fact that I'm mean and think she has the most unfortunate face ever. She comes from two such attractive people but unfortunately this is what you get when you take Demi's chin and Bruce's head. Her face is alienesque in a bad way, not an edgy Gemma Ward way, a bad way. I am awful. Anyway, my issue here? I love the colour, but you see how it's kind of slipped down at an angle because her hand is on her hip? I bet she kept having to pull it up all night to avoid flashing the crowd. Which brings me back to: Ill. Fitting. I have no idea how celebrities, with their relatively disposable incomes making them able to hire tailors, are unable to find dresses that fit. Good lord.
Hayden Panetierre
I'm sending you straight to a make-up shot with this one because I thought it was seriously flawless. Hayden must have one of the best make up artists in the industry working on her or something because her make up is generally perfect right down to the fake lashes. Gah. Anyway, that aside, the dress is why this is in Not As Ugly territory. I think she's got that thing wherein she's dating Milo, who is a good nine years older than her, thus she feels the pressure to dress older than she is. I'm thinking back to last year's Emmys, I think it was, where she wore that fun poofy pregnancy dress, and compared to now she looks like she's aged five years. When in reality, she's younger than me and girl only has a few more poofy dress wearing years left. Milo wasn't even there!
Sidebar: look at that shot of her looking over her shoulder. Is that a tattoo? Is that even legal in the States?! Cause she's not 21!
THE UGLY
Maggie Gyllenhaal
Okay. Wow. Okay. I have really, really tried to understand this dress. Every outlet including my local paper has put this on their best dressed list for the GGs, so I've gone back and looked at this dress from every angle available and my verdict is still the same. That print. Is. AWFUL. Yes, okay, it fit. This is a good thing. The detailing and the flattering cut are even better things. But they're all negated by that print. It's like a neon blue leopard died on her. It's like a neon blue butterfly landed on her shoulder and died or something. Some animal died, that's for sure. (Not really, but you get me). Just don't wear this again, Mags, please. Even if you were able to, don't. My entire reaction to this dress can be summed up in one word: WAT.
Also, I kinda thought the make up was a bit heavy handed, but that may just be the lights. Or me.
Renee Zellweger
Okay, see. Now they're just messing with us. I feel like this dress had to be some sort of joke. Surely, you think, she couldn't have gotten into this without someone - her manager, her publicist, her limo driver - pointing out how bad it was. Unfortunately for all of us, you'd be wrong. I felt like this would have been fine if the black had continued up to her chest to end in, say, a nice sweetheart line. You know, simple, a bit clingy but nice. Instead, it becomes this weird ripped-sleeve sheer choking thing and to make it worse she sticks a nude corset thing underneath. I'd actually far more like to see whoever is standing behind her in the light pink gown because it looks very pretty compared to Renee. But then again, I seriously think Maggie's dead neon leopard looks better than this. It's just that bad. Did we accidentally teleport to 1995?
THE LULZ
The Jo Bros
Who knows why the Jonas Brothers were even at the GGs. I don't try and explain these things. What makes this incredibly LOltastic is these boys were obviously not dressed by the same stylist. What makes it CAPSLOCK-ALARIOUS is that the Jonas Brothers are in fact demonstrating the three different kinds of dress codes you may find on any given invitation - smart casual (velvet blazer over a nice shirt!), semi-formal (wear a tie over that bright shirt!), and formal (rock that bow tie!).
Seriously though they don't even look like they belong together. So this one just had to get Char's LULZ Award for Stylist Fail.
There are some pictures of other famous types in sinful_caesar's post here, and some of the Mad Men, True Blood and HBO/NBC after-parties here. And Now I'm going to go faint from tiredness. Good night!