If I were a bear
I hate winter. There I've said it. I am the Grinch who stole Christmas.
You can say what you like, but you won't persuade me otherwise. Every clear, crisp winter's day has a morning where your breath fogs around your head, crystallizing into dark clouds of lethargy that work in cahoots with the natural temptation to snuggle to make you arrive late for work with a headache grumbling at the unfairness of life. Doesn't happen to you? See, told you: life really is unfair.
Snow fights are no fun at all. They're just a method, doubtless developed by human turncoats in league with the wintersmith, of providing the cold with an even more direct route to your misery glands. Unless there's ice chunks in the snow, mind. Even I have to concede that that's pretty funny, so long as it happens to someone else.
I have even heard it said that winter is a great opportunity to wear lots of clothes. First off, I don't consider something essential to continued survival to be an opportunity. Secondly, while some people may rock the look, I resemble the Michelin man. I find it hard to walk, and I'm still cold. No, give me the balmy embrace of the heat, sandals and a bepalmtree-ed creation reminiscent of an exotic beach location.
On the other hand, though...
If I were a bear
I would not care
about the winter deep.
I'd be asleep!
You can say what you like, but you won't persuade me otherwise. Every clear, crisp winter's day has a morning where your breath fogs around your head, crystallizing into dark clouds of lethargy that work in cahoots with the natural temptation to snuggle to make you arrive late for work with a headache grumbling at the unfairness of life. Doesn't happen to you? See, told you: life really is unfair.
Snow fights are no fun at all. They're just a method, doubtless developed by human turncoats in league with the wintersmith, of providing the cold with an even more direct route to your misery glands. Unless there's ice chunks in the snow, mind. Even I have to concede that that's pretty funny, so long as it happens to someone else.
I have even heard it said that winter is a great opportunity to wear lots of clothes. First off, I don't consider something essential to continued survival to be an opportunity. Secondly, while some people may rock the look, I resemble the Michelin man. I find it hard to walk, and I'm still cold. No, give me the balmy embrace of the heat, sandals and a bepalmtree-ed creation reminiscent of an exotic beach location.
On the other hand, though...
If I were a bear
I would not care
about the winter deep.
I'd be asleep!