(no subject)
i wanna have a new year's eve party at the cottage with no heating and a small group of people. i think it would be SMASHING and a good way to overrun any memories i had there with begeny in the wintertime. yup, sounds good.
i got my haircut again today and these are the best christophe quotes i have. again, christophe is about 6' 6'', very french, very gay, very skinny, and always wears tight white pants with sleeveless shirts. he is 40 years old and loves my eyebrows.
this is as i'm looking out the window and see a woman give the car in front of her a little love tap as she's trying to parallel park:
"ai deed zat vonce. i geeve za car in front a small boomp ahnd za voman inzide, she go CRAY-ZAY! (said with big eyes and a giggle after) you know? ai deed nuzing to za car but she zay, 'ooh my beby inzide ahnd you could have hurt za beby.' she ask me for my inzurance and everyzing! ahnd i zay no. nonono. ai zay ai geev your car zat leettle boomp ahnd za beby eez fine. ai tell my inzurance coompany, 'do not geev her any money! she eez white trash ahnd smokes cloves!' what do you zink is vorse for za beby, a boomp or heez muzhar in za front zeat poofing on her cloves? ooh she was zuch white trash. za sheriff says ai zmell drugs, you have some? ahnd ai zay, 'no i have none.' vat, eef ai have za drugs i vould tell him? noh! so zen i look at her ahnd ai zay ai zink za drug zmell eez from her white trash cloves."
ok the next one im just going to describe because that was exhausting. but i refuse to not type in his actual ridiculously thick accent because that would be like ignoring the messiah.... YES IT WOULD.
so then he's talking about how he has these new wrinkles and he's NOT happy about it. he says, "zat eez eet, no more!" as if he can choose. so he says he used to go to the tanning beds, and i made some comment about how i had heard that those were worse than the sun. he agrees, but then he says he's planning on going just a few more times in the next upcoming weeks before he goes to visit france so that he's nice and tanned to see everyone. he says, "ai vill not have a what do you say... member? membercard? noh, membership. i will not have a membership after zis because eet eez zo expensive! you know? that ahnd za cancer was expensive too. thousands of dollahrs to get a tiny spot of skeen off!"
OH MY GOD.
i got my haircut again today and these are the best christophe quotes i have. again, christophe is about 6' 6'', very french, very gay, very skinny, and always wears tight white pants with sleeveless shirts. he is 40 years old and loves my eyebrows.
this is as i'm looking out the window and see a woman give the car in front of her a little love tap as she's trying to parallel park:
"ai deed zat vonce. i geeve za car in front a small boomp ahnd za voman inzide, she go CRAY-ZAY! (said with big eyes and a giggle after) you know? ai deed nuzing to za car but she zay, 'ooh my beby inzide ahnd you could have hurt za beby.' she ask me for my inzurance and everyzing! ahnd i zay no. nonono. ai zay ai geev your car zat leettle boomp ahnd za beby eez fine. ai tell my inzurance coompany, 'do not geev her any money! she eez white trash ahnd smokes cloves!' what do you zink is vorse for za beby, a boomp or heez muzhar in za front zeat poofing on her cloves? ooh she was zuch white trash. za sheriff says ai zmell drugs, you have some? ahnd ai zay, 'no i have none.' vat, eef ai have za drugs i vould tell him? noh! so zen i look at her ahnd ai zay ai zink za drug zmell eez from her white trash cloves."
ok the next one im just going to describe because that was exhausting. but i refuse to not type in his actual ridiculously thick accent because that would be like ignoring the messiah.... YES IT WOULD.
so then he's talking about how he has these new wrinkles and he's NOT happy about it. he says, "zat eez eet, no more!" as if he can choose. so he says he used to go to the tanning beds, and i made some comment about how i had heard that those were worse than the sun. he agrees, but then he says he's planning on going just a few more times in the next upcoming weeks before he goes to visit france so that he's nice and tanned to see everyone. he says, "ai vill not have a what do you say... member? membercard? noh, membership. i will not have a membership after zis because eet eez zo expensive! you know? that ahnd za cancer was expensive too. thousands of dollahrs to get a tiny spot of skeen off!"
OH MY GOD.