Fic: First Thought (one-shot)
Title: First Thought
Author: miss_peg
Rating: T
Characters: Naomi/Emily
Summary: Emily's first thought isn't I want to fuck that girl, but what is Naomi's?
Disclaimer: Me own Skins? It's been two and a half years...do you think I've finally been handed ownership?
Notes: Written for writeskins. A past piece for you all, rather random, but hopefully still enjoyable all the same. I've written this for reddawg82
‘Just so you know, my first thought when I see you isn’t I want to fuck that girl. We’ve kissed, twice; it was nice. But it’s also nice just being with you, when you’re not being a prick, that is.’
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She always wondered what it would be like to have sex. At twelve, who really knew? Apart from the sluts that had allowed the little boy dicks anywhere near them. She didn’t think about it like everyone else. She didn’t imagine hot actors fucking them. She didn’t even think of the Year Eleven boys trying to get into her knickers at parties. She thought of Emily. After they kissed she’d thought of nothing else. She didn’t know how it even worked, sex with a girl, but she imagined rolling around in a bed with Emily like everyone else does. She couldn’t help it. Her first thought whenever she saw her was her hands on Emily’s hips thrusting against her.
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In the changing rooms for swimming she tried to stand as far away from Emily and her twin sister as feasibly possibly. Or at least ensure she wasn’t facing Emily whilst getting changed. Even then she couldn’t help but sneak a glance and allow her eyes to linger for a moment too long on Emily. She was one of those coy girls who got changed under their towels, afraid of their newfound pubescent bodies. Katie, as one of the more confident girls, threw her clothes off and didn’t care who saw the reddish brown hairs starting to grow above her pubic bone. Naomi never really looked for long; it felt wrong to stare at Katie. Not that it felt any more right to look at Emily either.
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On the last day of middle school Naomi saw Emily in the corridor. It was rare that she saw her alone, not chasing her sister like a puppy. She couldn’t control the movie-style image in her head of walking over to her without saying a word. She’d wrap her hands around Emily’s head, press her lips to hers and push her against the wall. There she’d have her wicked way with her, not that she really understood what that entailed. Sex education only talked about condoms and making babies, she didn’t understand how she could possibly have sex with Emily if they didn’t have the opposite parts.
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The one thing Naomi didn’t expect when she walked into the sports hall on the first day of college was to see Emily Fitch sitting in the back corner beside her sister. Their hair had turned a brighter shade of red than she remembered, hadn’t their hair always been brown? Then her thoughts travelled to that of Katie’s pubic hair and she couldn’t help but wonder what Emily looked like, down there. Would she look the same as her sister? Would she have more hair, being older? What would it be like to place her tongue between Emily’s legs?
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Same fucking form. Same Jesus fucking form would mean seeing her every single fucking day of her fucking college life. Christ. She wasn’t sure her body could cope with seeing her all the time. She’d spent the last couple of years forgetting that she’d ever existed. Only to find her there at college; waiting for her, taunting her with her kissable lips. She’d allowed her one almost-boyfriend to attempt oral sex on her, unsuccessfully mind, but she knew now; she understood what girls would do to each other. If they wanted to. But she didn’t because she wasn’t gay.
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‘I want to kiss you now.’
Christ. How could she respond to that? She could reach out and kiss her so hard that they tumbled to the floor and couldn’t help but fuck each other very hard. But they were in the middle of a party, in public, in front of people. And she was pretty sure she’d seen Effy hanging around, probably watching whatever was going on around her like she usually did. No, she didn’t want Emily to kiss her now, or ever.
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Lips, Emily’s lips on hers, how had she let it happen? It had been nearly four years since their first and only kiss, how could she have allowed it to carry on? She wasn’t going to fuck Emily. She was sure of that. But kissing her? It didn’t matter anyway, it wasn’t the same. A kiss wasn’t serious. A kiss didn’t mean she was gay. A kiss didn’t mean she could fuck her either. No matter how much she wanted to. She’d noticed it more and more as time had gone on, the feelings bubbling in the pit of her stomach every time Emily looked at her. Then there was the kissing. Her whole body had exploded when Emily’s lips had pressed against her own, so much so that she’d barely managed to kiss her back at first.
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Emily Fitch on her bed, on her fucking bed. Fucking Emily Fitch on her fucking bed. No. What was Emily doing there? Why was she staring at her with those fuck me eyes holding up some piece of paper? Of course, she wasn’t willing to give up the idea that Naomi could be the Student President. They didn’t know each other though, what did Emily fucking know about her? She just stared at her, waiting for her to speak. She couldn’t. If she did, maybe she would have asked her for a shag or a kiss. Not that she wanted either, really.
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Waking up to Emily lying in her bed in little more than a t-shirt and her knickers sent her whole body into a complete meltdown. She wanted to reach into her underwear and settle the burning desire. But how could she do that when Emily was lying next to her? More importantly, she’d rather have reached into Emily’s underwear. She was sleeping, what would she know? Except she could wake up and she would know that Naomi Campbell wasn’t such a straight girl after all. She couldn’t stay there, in that bed, with Emily sleeping peacefully beside her. Instead she grabbed her clothes; she’d have a shower and get dressed in the bathroom. Anything to avoid Emily.
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Sex. Emily. Sex. Emily. Sex. Semily. How had it happened? She’d spent years pining after her, the girl of her nightmares. She’d spent months worrying about the hidden agenda that she couldn’t voice. She’d spent years ignoring the underlying feeling that something wasn’t right when she kissed the boys at school, not that she kissed many. Now she’d spent the fucking night with Emily, in woods. If she could step out of the equation long enough, the whole thing was rather romantic, if you were into that sort of thing. A fire, a blanket, lips and hands wandering along the edges of their skin until Emily’s lips and fingers were there, working their magic in all her virginal glory. She’d succumbed to the beast within.
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‘Just so you know, my first thought when I see you isn’t I want to fuck that girl. We’ve kissed, twice; it was nice. But it’s also nice just being with you, when you’re not being a prick, that is.’
No. Emily’s first thought wasn’t like that because Emily wasn’t like that. Naomi, on the other hand, wasn’t quite so innocent.