(no subject)
What kind of life is this…
When I thought that my family life can’t get any worse it just did. I had the biggest argument with my mom yesterday. Daniel was suppose to have a haircut at 2 in the afternoon, and then I asked my mom if we could get dropped off there early because I usually don’t go to that hair cutting place. She said that ok, we’ll go early; so I waited downstairs for her and it was around 2:15 and she and my dad had to leave to go to their concert at Casino Rama I asked her again if she can drop us off early, she told me that they couldn’t anymore because there going to be late to catch their bus, so I told her to cancel the appointment then. She went in my room with her cell phone in her hand calling the hairdresser. So I called Daniel and told him to go back home because she cancelled the appointment. Then she starts going crazy about how she’s going to look stupid, I told her to cancel it, 15 minutes before. It’s not like it’s a professional hairdresser, its just in a house. I’m like you told me you were going to cancel the appointment, so I told him to go home, it’s not my problem you didn’t call her. I didn’t care if she looked stop or if she was late for the bus. She never wants to be early for anything; she has to be that typical Filipino. So she completely flipped out about the situation and said it’s not problem, it’s not my appointment; you and your boyfriend are useless. He’s on drugs and he’s useless that really got to me, and I’m like everybody has there problems you have your own gambling problem that you just don’t want to admit. By saying that she got even more pissed off at me. She started banging at my doors calling me a stupid idiot and a worthless whore. She kept on saying that she wanted to kill me. I was in my room, holding my door shut, while she tried to push and bang it open. She threw something at my dad’s head, and he got out of the way, then she went to get the knife in the kitchen to kill me. I’m like your trying to kill me and you say that you go to church; your nothing but a hypocrite. While we were fighting my boyfriend was on the phone with me. When she was banging on the door with the knife in her hard, I told my boyfriend to come over right away. She continued calling me a good for nothing whore. She told me that she wanted me out of the house when she got home from the casino, and that she didn’t want to see Daniel in the house. I’m like too bad, I’ll be in this house and Daniel will be here. That was the last time I talked well, yelled at her and saw her. I didn’t see her today and we’re not in talking terms. My aunt told me to apologize to her, but really why should I? I didn’t start it and I’ve been hurt my whole life. I don’t know when this is going to blow over, but it doesn’t seem like it would anytime soon. My house is just a house, it not a place I can call HOME. A home is a place where someone can feel safe, where people love you, where people make you feel like you belong somewhere. I never had that sense of home with my family. My home was more a person, than a place. My home is my fiancé and will always be my boyfriend. This is when I know I’m blessed to have him and know that he was sent to me for a reason.