Here's to soaring.
I remember so vividly the day I found out I was going to be in Peter Pan. It was the day that everything changed.
It was an ordinary day, like any other. It was a Thursday, and I was at home, mindlessly roaming around the internet, when the all-too familiar ding of my Gmail notifier let me know that I had a new email. I opened the email and there was a message from my agent, simply saying "You got Peter Pan!!!! your roles are x, x and understudying x and x). Those words, mere pixels on the screen, immediately tied my stomach in a knot and caused tears to burn my eyes. For a good ten seconds I was breathless, like I'd had the wind kicked out of me, and then I caught my breath enough to take one deep inhale before starting to cry tears of joy, alone in my apartment. With a shaking hand, I called my mother's cell phone. My sister answered, and when I abruptly asked to talk to mom, my sister handed the phone to her, warning her "She sounds upset". My mom said hello and I couldn't hold it in. With a great big sob I told her "Mommy! I got it!" She started whooping with excitement and I sat, slumped in my computer chair, crying my little eyes out.
From the first of January to the 23rd, I was pretty much as low as one could get. I had nothing lined up for the year, I had a guy in my life who was constantly making me feel like there was something horribly wrong with me, and I felt like I had no reason to get up in the morning. On my birthday I refused to see anyone other than my parents (because they refused to let me be alone all day) and resented every birthday wish I got. In fewer words, I was horribly, terribly, utterly depressed. And then, six days after my Peter Pan audition (which was the most enjoyable 2 hours of the year to that point), came the email that would make me do a complete 180.
As my relationship ended and I started PP, an experience that was scary and intimidating for the first few days, I started healing. Very quickly. Being surrounded by people who were so positive and seemed to care about me and respect me and who were talented and lovely and accepting, I found my feet under me again. Within weeks, I went from hiding in my eggshell to soaring above an audience (literally!) I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Peter Pan saved me. I was transformed from a psychologically beaten down girl to a confident actor and dancer. I don't think I'd ever been that happy in my life.
So, by the end of the contract, when George was holding auditions for West Side Story, I was at the top of my game. I walked in there, talked to him for a few minutes and didn't even DO anything. He didn't make me read or sing or dance...he just said "Yeah, you could do it".
And today, just before I went to the theatre to get ready for tonight's performance of Romeo and Juliet, I got the offer for West Side.
In a year when I had no expectations and thought that I'd end up in a terrible joe job hating myself and my life more than ever, I was given the best gift I could have received - a chance. A chance to prove myself. A chance to BE. I took that chance and ran with it.
And now, 2010 will be the year I was hired for THREE mainstage shows at Neptune, spent a wonderful summer in Toronto and met more amazing, talented, inspiring people than I could have imagined.
I feel like I'm flying - and there are no wires this time.
:D
It was an ordinary day, like any other. It was a Thursday, and I was at home, mindlessly roaming around the internet, when the all-too familiar ding of my Gmail notifier let me know that I had a new email. I opened the email and there was a message from my agent, simply saying "You got Peter Pan!!!! your roles are x, x and understudying x and x). Those words, mere pixels on the screen, immediately tied my stomach in a knot and caused tears to burn my eyes. For a good ten seconds I was breathless, like I'd had the wind kicked out of me, and then I caught my breath enough to take one deep inhale before starting to cry tears of joy, alone in my apartment. With a shaking hand, I called my mother's cell phone. My sister answered, and when I abruptly asked to talk to mom, my sister handed the phone to her, warning her "She sounds upset". My mom said hello and I couldn't hold it in. With a great big sob I told her "Mommy! I got it!" She started whooping with excitement and I sat, slumped in my computer chair, crying my little eyes out.
From the first of January to the 23rd, I was pretty much as low as one could get. I had nothing lined up for the year, I had a guy in my life who was constantly making me feel like there was something horribly wrong with me, and I felt like I had no reason to get up in the morning. On my birthday I refused to see anyone other than my parents (because they refused to let me be alone all day) and resented every birthday wish I got. In fewer words, I was horribly, terribly, utterly depressed. And then, six days after my Peter Pan audition (which was the most enjoyable 2 hours of the year to that point), came the email that would make me do a complete 180.
As my relationship ended and I started PP, an experience that was scary and intimidating for the first few days, I started healing. Very quickly. Being surrounded by people who were so positive and seemed to care about me and respect me and who were talented and lovely and accepting, I found my feet under me again. Within weeks, I went from hiding in my eggshell to soaring above an audience (literally!) I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Peter Pan saved me. I was transformed from a psychologically beaten down girl to a confident actor and dancer. I don't think I'd ever been that happy in my life.
So, by the end of the contract, when George was holding auditions for West Side Story, I was at the top of my game. I walked in there, talked to him for a few minutes and didn't even DO anything. He didn't make me read or sing or dance...he just said "Yeah, you could do it".
And today, just before I went to the theatre to get ready for tonight's performance of Romeo and Juliet, I got the offer for West Side.
In a year when I had no expectations and thought that I'd end up in a terrible joe job hating myself and my life more than ever, I was given the best gift I could have received - a chance. A chance to prove myself. A chance to BE. I took that chance and ran with it.
And now, 2010 will be the year I was hired for THREE mainstage shows at Neptune, spent a wonderful summer in Toronto and met more amazing, talented, inspiring people than I could have imagined.
I feel like I'm flying - and there are no wires this time.
:D