pukefest 04'
Went downtown to chill with Donald and a few others last night. I have never seen so much vomiting in all my life. Some chick came over with three of her friends. The first one, Sara, went down for the count first. I was the one who had to carry her around the house and take care of her struck ass while she lost it in the toilet. Lemme tell yah ladies, there's nothing sexier than a chick who has her head in the toilet puking all over herself, then trying to tell you you're a nice guy and thanking you with a kiss. Needless to say, I turned her down. The next one to lose it was Tiffany. She was carrying around a bottle of rum for awhile. As she lay on the couch, in my usual sadist capacity, I asked her, "Don't you think it's kind of dangerous to get shitfaced in a strange house full of people you don't know? I mean, I ought to put you in your trunk, drive you out to the country and bury you alive." her response was: "I'm so horny. I want to have sex." at which point she rolled over and vomited up about a gallon of something that resembled wet toilet paper. I watched her lie in her own puke, and had a good chuckle, until the stench became so overwhelming, I tossed a blanket over her and her puke to make a little 'stench tent'.
As if that weren't the worst of it. Steve-O had been drinking 92 proof rum with the hopes of getting laid. As it became more apparent that every chick here was going to puke all over the place, he began to drink more heavily. As we are about to leave, Steve-O meets some random black guy on the street, and eats some of his greasy fried chicken that was offered to him. Shortly thereafter, Steve-O lost a good mix of bean and rice enchalada with fried chicken basted in a 92 proof rum stomach acid sauce in my floorboards, all over the side of my car, and into my windows. Didn't make it back till' 5:30AM, and spent the rest of my sunday morning cleaning up my car.
As if that weren't the worst of it. Steve-O had been drinking 92 proof rum with the hopes of getting laid. As it became more apparent that every chick here was going to puke all over the place, he began to drink more heavily. As we are about to leave, Steve-O meets some random black guy on the street, and eats some of his greasy fried chicken that was offered to him. Shortly thereafter, Steve-O lost a good mix of bean and rice enchalada with fried chicken basted in a 92 proof rum stomach acid sauce in my floorboards, all over the side of my car, and into my windows. Didn't make it back till' 5:30AM, and spent the rest of my sunday morning cleaning up my car.