(no subject)

[mishchaotic]

Fuck man
Im just losing it here
I miss pete so much but at the same time im trying to re-evaluate
im just so fucking depressed without him
im so freaking lonely and i try to hang out with people
and there cool
but i feel like im not even there
i have no one to talk to about it
pete makes me feel like complete shit
i just wanna be with him so bad and i would do anything to be
but he doesnt feel that way
do i really wanna be more in love with some one then they are with me
he wants to tour and i support him
but at the same time how long does he want me to wait to be together with him again
i feel like im torturing myself
I just never wanted to be attached to anyone for this reason
i never wanted to feel so much hurt and now i do all the time
and it is making me hate and lash anger more than ever

theres just nothing left in me anymore
im the lowest ive ever been