wake up, wake up
sometimes you just feel like you're incapable of being loved.
thats what i feel like right now. i'm getting kicked out next week if i dont have a job.. which i dont. wtf.
mana said i could stay with her for a while. she said i wouldnt be "imposing" but i swear i would be. i think she was just saying it to be nice. alos lindsey told buzz that ericka was "sick of my shit" and that she cant stand me. that makes me sad bc she didnt say it to my face. i feel so fucking unwanted in this house and everywhere. if my own flesh and blood doesnt love me how can anyone else?!
omfg. i hate this shit so bad. i'm glad that im not one of those suicidal people cause i'd kill myself if i was.
however, i think that suicide is stupid and selfish and i think that the people who do it need help but dont want it. therefore they think theres no help for them. they have selective hearing.
whatever.
we were driving down the road the other day and no one at all was there. it was just us and the car and the desolate streets sprawled out before us. thats what i feel like right now. desolate.
i love mana and buzz because they try and comfprt me. not to mention mana who is also wonderful. i love them. but maybe i should stop loving. i loved my mom and what does she do? she kicks me out because im a "grownup" now. fuckin i'm trying so hard to get a job. motherfucker sldkjfhljgahljsdhgf
i'm sorry if this doesnt make any sense but i'm just saying what im thinking. which i havent done in a while.
sorry.
bye.
thats what i feel like right now. i'm getting kicked out next week if i dont have a job.. which i dont. wtf.
mana said i could stay with her for a while. she said i wouldnt be "imposing" but i swear i would be. i think she was just saying it to be nice. alos lindsey told buzz that ericka was "sick of my shit" and that she cant stand me. that makes me sad bc she didnt say it to my face. i feel so fucking unwanted in this house and everywhere. if my own flesh and blood doesnt love me how can anyone else?!
omfg. i hate this shit so bad. i'm glad that im not one of those suicidal people cause i'd kill myself if i was.
however, i think that suicide is stupid and selfish and i think that the people who do it need help but dont want it. therefore they think theres no help for them. they have selective hearing.
whatever.
we were driving down the road the other day and no one at all was there. it was just us and the car and the desolate streets sprawled out before us. thats what i feel like right now. desolate.
i love mana and buzz because they try and comfprt me. not to mention mana who is also wonderful. i love them. but maybe i should stop loving. i loved my mom and what does she do? she kicks me out because im a "grownup" now. fuckin i'm trying so hard to get a job. motherfucker sldkjfhljgahljsdhgf
i'm sorry if this doesnt make any sense but i'm just saying what im thinking. which i havent done in a while.
sorry.
bye.