Fanfic; Buffy: For forgiveness?
Title: For forgiveness
Author:
miseryofdeath or
wolfoflonliness if you like. go for the same.
Fandom: Buffy the vampire slayer
Prompt: #26 writers choice
Character/Pairing: General - Buffy, Faith
Rating: none
Word Count: 846
Summary: Faith has realised all the bad things she has done, will she manage too get Buffy's forgiveness?
Authors Notes/Disclaimer: n/a
For Forgiveness?
She hated the spitfire that gleamed from the other girls eyes, hated the resentment that just flashed past and into her. The roaring flames licking up on her in hell seemed more appealing than staying and facing up too her own sins. If only she could sacrifice herself for the benefit of the humans and the survival of the world. But she wasn’t Buffy, she couldn’t be the heroine when it was needed, her addictions just made it worse. She should, her thoughts wandered too the topic of giving up her own life for the just cause, but there was no real solution in anything she could tell herself.
Her hands had never had the gift of holding still, always occupied in doing something, twirling strands of hair, sharpening stakes and putting on makeup, the shaking restlessness has settled in her whole body. A sweet sharpening taste too make her run in every possible directions at once. Different parts of her craved places at opposite poles, a carved feeling attached too this soul sliding inside her ribcage.
“I don’t deserve it” Her head hung low, as she spoke the dreaded, but too true words. Each letter shaking with sincerity,
“Hence the me not giving it too you part. Didn’t you hear me correctly?” It was spit out of her mouth, right back into her face. It was at that moment she recognized the feeling of defeat inside, of empty. Everything was on a steady downhill drive, but it had never surprised her a least bit. Since her hands first tainted by human blood, she was nothing inside. Her feelings raided and robbed away. Though the world seemed too hate her bitterly, it would never matter if she’d just earn the blond slayers forgiveness. If only she could look into Buffy’s eyes, too see nothing but love and accept. But the roaring steam of hate clouded Buffy’s eyes each time they landed on her unworthy skin.
Eventually, when it came down too it, Faith knew she had done nothing too make up for her countless horrible mistakes. Her mind pondered it time and time again, but as she knew there was nothing that could make up for almost killing the love of Buffy’s life, and actually killing her boy-toy soldier. Tracing the deep circle, she opened the memories over again; hurting worse for each time she revealed and relived them. Sinking too her knees, she could watch the sun go up and down several times as she writhed in pain.
“I’m leaving Sunnydale. So you can pick up the pieces of your life again.” Her dark hair flying scattered against her face, it was a windy day, her bag looped around her arms. She stood there awaiting some kind of reaction, the hair swept of the tears welling up in her eyes, one by one. Buffy was a stone statue, her eyes glowing with mute hatred. “I’m sorry” it was said so quietly, Buffy would never have heard it without her slayer hearing, it was better that way. Buffy could pretend she didn’t hear it, and Faith could pretend she never said it. Sorry was the hardest part of living.
It took some time, but finally Buffy composed herself enough too throw some sarcastic hurting lines back at her. “But you don’t regret it. Don’t bother if you can’t even feel the pain.” She wanted too tell Buffy there was nothing else than pain, but kept silent for once. “You’ve never been anything but a dirty slut, just like your mother, Faith. I hate you, there is no words for what you did too me. You don’t get too feel sorry. Goodbye.” With those sneering words, the blond slayer walked away, leaving a broken slayer and a delicious smell of innocence and vanilla in her trail.
A thorn left in her heart, and the knowledge of maybe some day, dulled the pain just a little bit. Her hands vibrated nervously, knowing she was about to start a new life. Fumbling with locks, knives and bodies. Her eyes needed the momentary warmth from their bodies, but she knew it was the right time too quit her addiction in order too seek her goal of regret, repenting and redemption. In the end a smile from Buffy would indeed be worth anything. It ached in her chest, knowing all the harm she’d done and even more so did the separation from her slayer sister. A priceless reward, she’d go smiling too hell for that, but the weight of herself was too heavy too smile even a second.
Her eyes glared into a darker colour, squinting her eyes too see properly in the setting darkness. Faith had been out a winters night before, and eventually she’d get through landing on her feet. Determined, she wanted too fight the numbness, and lessen the pain, there was time for learning how too feel properly feel again.
Faith, dark slayer.. Smirking, she’d prove them wrong again. Over and over, until she was back with grace from them all. The journey had already begun.
End
Author:
miseryofdeath or
wolfoflonliness if you like. go for the same.
Fandom: Buffy the vampire slayer
Prompt: #26 writers choice
Character/Pairing: General - Buffy, Faith
Rating: none
Word Count: 846
Summary: Faith has realised all the bad things she has done, will she manage too get Buffy's forgiveness?
Authors Notes/Disclaimer: n/a
For Forgiveness?
She hated the spitfire that gleamed from the other girls eyes, hated the resentment that just flashed past and into her. The roaring flames licking up on her in hell seemed more appealing than staying and facing up too her own sins. If only she could sacrifice herself for the benefit of the humans and the survival of the world. But she wasn’t Buffy, she couldn’t be the heroine when it was needed, her addictions just made it worse. She should, her thoughts wandered too the topic of giving up her own life for the just cause, but there was no real solution in anything she could tell herself.
Her hands had never had the gift of holding still, always occupied in doing something, twirling strands of hair, sharpening stakes and putting on makeup, the shaking restlessness has settled in her whole body. A sweet sharpening taste too make her run in every possible directions at once. Different parts of her craved places at opposite poles, a carved feeling attached too this soul sliding inside her ribcage.
“I don’t deserve it” Her head hung low, as she spoke the dreaded, but too true words. Each letter shaking with sincerity,
“Hence the me not giving it too you part. Didn’t you hear me correctly?” It was spit out of her mouth, right back into her face. It was at that moment she recognized the feeling of defeat inside, of empty. Everything was on a steady downhill drive, but it had never surprised her a least bit. Since her hands first tainted by human blood, she was nothing inside. Her feelings raided and robbed away. Though the world seemed too hate her bitterly, it would never matter if she’d just earn the blond slayers forgiveness. If only she could look into Buffy’s eyes, too see nothing but love and accept. But the roaring steam of hate clouded Buffy’s eyes each time they landed on her unworthy skin.
Eventually, when it came down too it, Faith knew she had done nothing too make up for her countless horrible mistakes. Her mind pondered it time and time again, but as she knew there was nothing that could make up for almost killing the love of Buffy’s life, and actually killing her boy-toy soldier. Tracing the deep circle, she opened the memories over again; hurting worse for each time she revealed and relived them. Sinking too her knees, she could watch the sun go up and down several times as she writhed in pain.
“I’m leaving Sunnydale. So you can pick up the pieces of your life again.” Her dark hair flying scattered against her face, it was a windy day, her bag looped around her arms. She stood there awaiting some kind of reaction, the hair swept of the tears welling up in her eyes, one by one. Buffy was a stone statue, her eyes glowing with mute hatred. “I’m sorry” it was said so quietly, Buffy would never have heard it without her slayer hearing, it was better that way. Buffy could pretend she didn’t hear it, and Faith could pretend she never said it. Sorry was the hardest part of living.
It took some time, but finally Buffy composed herself enough too throw some sarcastic hurting lines back at her. “But you don’t regret it. Don’t bother if you can’t even feel the pain.” She wanted too tell Buffy there was nothing else than pain, but kept silent for once. “You’ve never been anything but a dirty slut, just like your mother, Faith. I hate you, there is no words for what you did too me. You don’t get too feel sorry. Goodbye.” With those sneering words, the blond slayer walked away, leaving a broken slayer and a delicious smell of innocence and vanilla in her trail.
A thorn left in her heart, and the knowledge of maybe some day, dulled the pain just a little bit. Her hands vibrated nervously, knowing she was about to start a new life. Fumbling with locks, knives and bodies. Her eyes needed the momentary warmth from their bodies, but she knew it was the right time too quit her addiction in order too seek her goal of regret, repenting and redemption. In the end a smile from Buffy would indeed be worth anything. It ached in her chest, knowing all the harm she’d done and even more so did the separation from her slayer sister. A priceless reward, she’d go smiling too hell for that, but the weight of herself was too heavy too smile even a second.
Her eyes glared into a darker colour, squinting her eyes too see properly in the setting darkness. Faith had been out a winters night before, and eventually she’d get through landing on her feet. Determined, she wanted too fight the numbness, and lessen the pain, there was time for learning how too feel properly feel again.
Faith, dark slayer.. Smirking, she’d prove them wrong again. Over and over, until she was back with grace from them all. The journey had already begun.
End