Title: Caught Up In Circles
Author:
misachanArtist:
chosenfire28Fandom: Supernatural
Relationship(s)/Characters: Dean/Castiel/Lisa
Word Count: 2132
Rating: PG-13
Content Notes/Warnings: S6 AU; some sexual situations, a little voyeurism, rampant abuse of time travel
Summary: Five times Lisa Braeden met an angel of the Lord.
"Babe? I picked up those whole wheat rolls for dinner tonight. I know you don't like them but Ben needs to eat more..."
Lisa just barely managed to stifle the shriek when she walked into the living room and saw a trenchcoated figure perched on the edge of her coffee table, distracting her from the ongoing effort to trick Dean into eating something approaching healthy (the tipping point had come when she overheard him informing Ben that bacon and pie were two of the basic food groups and couldn't be sure he was kidding.) She put down the bag of groceries and edged around the sofa; Dean was fast asleep, his head propped up against the arm of the sofa and a half-empty glass of scotch making a ring on her coffee table. "Hello, Lisa," he said, those blue eyes not leaving Dean's face.
"Castiel," she answered, leaning against the arm of the sofa. She knew Dean called him "Cas," but she preferred his real name, the lilt at the end of it. Not that she'd gotten Dean to say either version of his name very often; after her curiosity got the better of her and she finally asked Dean just who was that friend of his she'd met that day at the bus station she'd gotten a curt story about divine intervention and the varying levels of dickery found in angels. When Lisa hadn't known how to respond to that Dean had taken it as a sign that the conversation was over and poured himself a double of whiskey, the same way he had when she'd made the mistake of mentioning Sam and his father.
And now she had an angel of the Lord sitting on her coffee table. "You look better than you did the last time I saw you."
Lisa thought the man who'd kissed her in that bus station would have smiled at that. She wondered what had happened in the months between. "That was a very difficult day." His brow furrowed just the slightest amount. "How is he?"
As if that was such a simple question. "He has nightmares. He drinks more than I'd like. He won't talk about anything that happened before he showed up at my door." He nodded once, as if that was about what he'd expected. "It's better now than it was in the first few days."
As if to prove her wrong Dean twitched in his sleep, his hand clenching into a fist as he hitched in that first, sharp breath that Lisa knew always came before the really bad ones. Before he could spiral farther Castiel pressed two fingers against his forehead and Dean quieted, sinking back into deep sleep.
"Wish you'd been around a few nights ago."
Castiel glanced up at her, giving her a good look at the circles under his eyes before going back to studying Dean like he expected to be tested on this later. "I'd hoped he would be happy here."
"I hope he can be, too. We're working on it." She sat up on the arm of the sofa and brushed her fingertips against Dean's hair. "It doesn't happen by wishing really hard, unfortunately. It would be nice, don't get me wrong, but it's usually not that easy."
"I've received several lessons in the folly of wishful thinking since meeting Dean," Castiel said, nodding again once.
Lisa stared him down until he met her gaze. "Castiel, what happened to Sam? Dean won't tell me anything."
He looked away. "Sam is lost." He let out a soft, bitter breath. "I wish Dean had told me what would happen. I might have been able to do things differently."
She wondered what it was about the two of them that made them so allergic to straight answers. "I still have your hospital bracelet," she said, choosing to lighten the mood instead of asking more questions that would only get her riddles in return. "I found it in my bag the other day."
Castiel did almost smile at that. "Because you never throw anything away. Because of your grandmother."
Lisa felt herself sit up straight; granted, that was all true but she knew they'd never had that conversation.
Or at the very least, Lisa thought to herself, they hadn't yet. "Why are you here? And don't say it's for old times' sake." He glanced up at her again, a quick, guilty look. "Don't get me wrong, I'd be more than happy to set another plate at the table but I doubt you dropped by from Heaven because you got a sudden craving for my turkey burgers."
"They are very good."
"Don't change the subject." She didn't know how her life had gotten to the point where she was sassing angels, but here she was.
At any rate, he didn't seem offended; his eyes took on a faraway look and she didn't miss the way his fingers curled tight around the edge of the table. "I've found myself at a crossroads." Lisa sat herself more comfortably on the arm of the chair, letting him find his words. "The situation in Heaven is much worse than I could have imagined. What I'd thought would be a quick conflict is on the verge of erupting into civil war and if it does I can't be sure it will end with me standing on the winning side."
"That seems pretty straightforward to me."
Castiel lowered his gaze. "I'm considering making an alliance. One that could give me the power to win the war but would require...regrettable things. Potentially many regrettable things." He looked back at Dean, his hands tight enough now on the table that Lisa could see white in his knuckles. "At the same time I've just discovered how to accomplish something I'd thought would be impossible. If I do go through with the proposed alliance that would have to be pushed back, perhaps indefinitely. Perhaps too late to do it properly. The time frame I'd need to be successful is very small."
"So it's either say yes to this alliance or do this...whatever this is you just found out you can do."
"That would be an accurate summary."
Lisa couldn't put off asking the obvious question. "Why come here and tell me all this?"
"You've given me good counsel before." For some reason that made his lip curl up."Although the choice would probably be simpler if I hadn't taken your advice then. I feel like I should be able to commit to the logical choice in front of me but something holds me back. I have very few people in my life I can trust to give me unbiased advice." He gave her an almost guilty look. "I miss the days when I was happy to have people tell me what to do."
"I think we all have those days sometimes." Lisa raked one hand through her hair; Heavenly civil wars were a higher caliber of problem than she knew what to do with; suddenly her waffling over whether to paint the living room was too petty to ever think about again. "My great uncle on my mother's side was the most pessimistic man alive. He was like if someone took one of those spoofs of fatalistic old Russians you see in movies and made them real, only with more profanity, and when I was six he sat me down and told me that if I always expected the worst from everyone and everything I'd never be disappointed."
"I take it from your tone that isn't appropriate."
"It was one of the more exciting Christmases, I'll give you that. I'm editing out some language." She'd never seen anyone turn as bright a red as her mother had when she'd repeated that sage advice over dessert, faithfully remembering every exciting R-rated word. "Anyway, he also told me that the best way to decide between two bad choices - and I'm editing there, too - was to decide which worst case scenario you hated more. So how about it?" she said, waiting for his gaze to flick back up to her. "If you don't go through with this alliance, what's the worst thing that could happen?"
"Raphael will rule Heaven and restart the Apocalypse. And if he can't manage that, he'll console himself with boiling the planet in a rain of sulfur and acid until nothing higher than bacteria can thrive here."
"Oh." She was suddenly almost overwhelmed by the need to drive down to Ben's school and hug him until he couldn't breathe. "Is...is that an unlikely worst-case---"
"No."
She was definitely signing Ben out early today. "So. If that's true why are you having such a hard time deciding?"
"I...." She saw the muscle in his jaw clench tight. "I don't understand," he said, a defeated tone creeping into his voice. "My choice should be clear. I don't know why I'm having trouble committing to the path." His lips curled into a snarl. "There are times I dearly wish I hadn't made that miscalculation and landed here. It's complicated everything."
Someday the two of them would manage to have a conversation without pieces missing. "So what's the worst case for door number two?"
His brows furrowed for a moment. "I assume you mean the other choice. Failure. Death. Quite possibly worse than death, and leaving Earth to Raphael's mercy." He let out a long breath. "But not pursuing that avenue carries its own regrets."
Lisa reached over to pull the afghan tangled around Dean's legs up over his shoulders. "Which regret is bigger? The one where you go through with it or the one where you don't?"
Lisa watched him watch Dean sleep for a few long, silent moments. "Thank you," he finally said, his voice very soft. "I hadn't considered it that way before."
There was a finality in his voice that sent alarm up Lisa's spine. "Stay for dinner," she said, the words rushing out. "Ben and Dean both eat like ravenous wolves but I'm sure we could beat them back long enough to save one burger for you."
"I don't think that's a very good idea."
"I think Dean needs every friend he can have."
"I'm not sure Dean even considers me a friend anymore."
Lisa wondered if she should say that Sam wasn't the only person Dean had nightmares about. Before she could find the right words Castiel said, "But I would like him to."
"Then stay."
"I can't."
"Why not?"
"Because I know I didn't." He looked up at her again. "This is the third time now you've shown me the means to get to where I needed to go."
Lisa only counted two, but she supposed that was something to look forward to. "I think you owe me something, don't you?"
That at least made his lips quirk up. "Fulfilling that promise before you've bound me to it would be no more valid now than it was in the bus station."
Lisa supposed that did make a certain amount of frustrating sense. "I will hold you to it, though."
He looked up at that, the intensity in those blue eyes almost pinning her down to the sofa. "Do that." Then he was off in a flutter of wings, quickly enough that Lisa barely had time to blink. She stayed still for a few seconds, as if that would call him back, fear curling in her stomach like a swarm of snakes. Then Dean began to stir and she eased herself on top of him, watching his eyes slowly blink open.
"Hey," he said, his lips curling up. "You should wake me up like this all the time."
"Don't get used to it," she said, giving him a teasing kiss anyway. "How about we pick up Ben early and we all go out to that new pizza place you wanted to try?"
"Yeah? The place you said looked like they served grease with a side order of grease?"
And the way he said it made it sound like a plus. "Yep. That one."
"Cool." He trailed his hands up her arms. "Hey, you okay? What got into you? Not that I'm complaining."
Lisa chewed the inside of her lip. Well, your angel friend came by and I think I talked him into doing something really stupid and also the world might be ending. "I just feel like all of us going out somewhere tonight."
"Sounds good by me." Dean slid his hands up under her blouse, that same sly smile that had charmed her into his car so many years ago on his face. "We gotta leave right away?" he whispered into her ear.
She returned the smile, quieting the fear by giving him a slow, lingering kiss. "I think we can work something out."
***
-On To Part 3- -Back To Masterpost -Back To Part One-