What Scientologists Really Believe. (Seriously)
Indeed, what Scientologists truly believe:
"It all began 75,000,000 years ago...
Back then, there was a galactic federation of planets which was ruled over by the evil Lord Xenu. Xenu thought his galaxy was overpopulated, and so he rounded up countless aliens from all different planets, and then had those aliens frozen with hydrogen bombs.
The frozen alien bodies were loaded onto Xenu's galactic cruisers, which look like DC-8's, except with rocket engines. The cruisers then took the frozen alien bodies to our planet, Earth, and then dumped them into the volcanoes of Hawaii. The aliens were no longer frozen: they were dead.
The souls of those aliens, however, lived on and all floated up towards the sky. But, the evil Lord Xenu had prepared for this.
Xenu didn't want those souls to return, so be built giant soul-catchers in the sky. The souls were then taken to a huge soul-brainwashing facility, which Xenu also built on Earth.
There, the souls were forced to watch days of brainwashing material, which tricked them into believing a false reality.
Xenu then released the alien souls, which roamed the Earth aimlessly in a fog of confusion.
At the dawn of Man, the souls finally found bodies which they could grab onto. They attached themselves to all Mankind, which still to this day causes all of our fears, our confusions, and our problems."
Now, as crazy as that may sound to you, think about it: this "religion" started with some person people see as a prophet. That prophet showed his public a book. After the book/commandments/testaments/sci-fi novel is widely read, people blindly follow and misconceive the big picture. Then, that group of people with their beliefs and values openly and ignorantly turn a blind eye to other groups of people and their beliefs. It's all part of the larger family that is religion...
(But in all honesty, I hope none of you are Scientologists. I'll fuckin' break your face in with one of those goddamn Thetan E-meter thingies.)
~ J
"It all began 75,000,000 years ago...
Back then, there was a galactic federation of planets which was ruled over by the evil Lord Xenu. Xenu thought his galaxy was overpopulated, and so he rounded up countless aliens from all different planets, and then had those aliens frozen with hydrogen bombs.
The frozen alien bodies were loaded onto Xenu's galactic cruisers, which look like DC-8's, except with rocket engines. The cruisers then took the frozen alien bodies to our planet, Earth, and then dumped them into the volcanoes of Hawaii. The aliens were no longer frozen: they were dead.
The souls of those aliens, however, lived on and all floated up towards the sky. But, the evil Lord Xenu had prepared for this.
Xenu didn't want those souls to return, so be built giant soul-catchers in the sky. The souls were then taken to a huge soul-brainwashing facility, which Xenu also built on Earth.
There, the souls were forced to watch days of brainwashing material, which tricked them into believing a false reality.
Xenu then released the alien souls, which roamed the Earth aimlessly in a fog of confusion.
At the dawn of Man, the souls finally found bodies which they could grab onto. They attached themselves to all Mankind, which still to this day causes all of our fears, our confusions, and our problems."
Now, as crazy as that may sound to you, think about it: this "religion" started with some person people see as a prophet. That prophet showed his public a book. After the book/commandments/testaments/sci-fi novel is widely read, people blindly follow and misconceive the big picture. Then, that group of people with their beliefs and values openly and ignorantly turn a blind eye to other groups of people and their beliefs. It's all part of the larger family that is religion...
(But in all honesty, I hope none of you are Scientologists. I'll fuckin' break your face in with one of those goddamn Thetan E-meter thingies.)
~ J